Ask the Zelda Crew
by BlindandMute
Summary: In here all you have to do is send a review telling a dare for one of the Zelda characters. If I like your review you might see it here! Also ZELDA CHARACTERS GET TORRTURED IN HERE TOO!
1. Chapter 1

Twilight: YAY!

Link: Why is she so happy?

Lk17: Because we got reviews

Midna: Oh………….joy

Zelda: Alright bring it on

Twilight: First things first do the disclaimer

Link: But I don't want to!

Twilight: (pulls out gun) I SAID DO IT!

Link: TWILIGHT DOES NOT OWN ZELDA!!

Lk17 Ok I'll read the first review it's from INUGIRL

_**HI!I GOT SOME QUESTIONS**_

FIRST QUEATION:MIDNA,WHAT WERE YOU GOING TO SAY TO LINK BEFORE YOU SMASH THE  
MIRROR?

SECOND QUESTION:LINK,HOW DID YOU FEEL WHEN MIDNA BROKE THE MIRROR?

THIRD QUESTION:LINK,WILL YOU ACKNOWLEGED MY FEELINGS FOR YOU?!I...I...L-LOVE  
YOU!I REALLY DO!I'M SERIOUS!

FOURTH QUESTION:LINK,IS IT OK IF I FALL EVEN MORE IN LOVE WITH YOU?

FIFTH QUESTION:MIDNA,WILL YOU BE RETURNING IN ANOTHER GAME SOON?

GOOD-BYE LINK-SAMA.

Midna: (blushes) Whatever I wanted to say to him was personal

Ilia: Twilight is going to kill you if you don't say the truth

Twilight: (sharpening and axe)

Midna: Ohhhh……..I was going to say he was a good friend! (hides in a corner)

Zelda: And?

Midna: (mumbles)

Link: I cant hear you

Midna: And that I would miss you

Lk17: Awwwwwwwww

Twilight: Second question

Link: Well when she broke the mirror I thought I would never see her again and that I lost a good alley

Ilia: (sniff) Beautiful

Zelda: Okkkkkk………….Third question

Link: I'm afraid to answer this question. But I always have a lot of fan girls

Twilight: (cough) No he doesn't (cough)

Link: Ummmm…………I guess you can fall more in love with me………But I'm not sure that I will love you back BECAUSE I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE!

Midna: I don't know I might return in another game to annoy the living daylights out of Link

**Twilight: Well there you have it! Thank you INUGIRL!!**

**Lk17: Next reviewer, Zelda you read it**

**Zelda: Its from Triforce of Shadow and he is asking**

_**I have question. If the only way to the Gerudo Desert is by the  
canon at the lake or by vortex then how the heck does everyone else get  
there?**_

That's all, thanks.

Twilight: I think that badly dressed guy opened it up for the public

Link: I guess

Lk17: (sigh) Don't forget to review Dares people!

Twilight: YEAH! You can review dares, Comments, or questions!

Ilia: Well that's it for now

Twilight and Lk17: WAIT!!

Everyone: WHAT! WHO DIED!?

Lk17: We have to do SOMETHING to displease you!

Midna: (sigh) Bring it on

Twilight and Lk17: (Pulls out mallet)


	2. Chapter 2

Twilight: (sleeping)

Midna: TWILIGHT!

Twilight: OH MY GOD IT'S THE BOOGIE MAN!!

Midna: Twiight it's me

Twilight: Oh geez, Midna what are you doing in my bedroom!? The show doesn't start for another 6 hours!

Midna: I know but I thought since I'm your favorite character out of the Twilight princess we should have a chapter just me and you

Twilight: Ok…..is there a reason your holding a camera?

Midna: I thought we could also make this as a chapter

Twilight: OH NO you remember what happened last time I did a chapter without Lk17

Midna: (flashes back)

_Twilight: AHHHH!! LIONS!!_

_Link: (cries under the table)_

_Ilia: (running around in circle)(power goes out)_

Midna: (Shudders)

Twilight: Hey wait a minuet is that thing on!?

Midna: (looks around) No it's not

Twilight: Then why is it pointed at me?

Midna: I thought this was a good shot of you

Twilight: No it's on

Midna: No it's not

Twilight: I can see the red light on it. It's on

Midna: No….it's uh…all in you imagination

Twilight: GIVE ME THE CAMERA!

Midna: NO!

Twilight: Midna give me the camera!

**PLEASE STAND BY **(slapping noises) OW! MIDNA GIVE ME THE CAMERA!!

(Camera comes on again)

Midna: (Hiding behind a bush) Ok Twilight wont notice me behind here

Twilight: Stupid Midna. Waking me up and 4 in the morning. Recording me on some cheap camera. Making me grumble to myself

Midna: (snickers)

Twilight: Midna is that you!?

Midna: Uhh….(in a deeper voice) No it's not

Twilight: Midna for the last time YOU DO NOT SOUND LIKE ELVIS PRESLY!!

Midna: Really? Aw man…..

Twilight: NOW STOP RECORDING ME!

Midna: But it's fun!

Twilight: Whats so "fun" about me standing?

Midna: Your in your PJ'S!

Twilight: (looks down to reveal doggie pawprint pajamas) I wants wearing this when I went to sleep!

Midna: (coughs)

Twilight: MIDNA!!

Midna: How about we read the reviews?

Twilight: One is for Link and he is sleeping

Midna: (pulls out baseball bat)

Twilight: (smiles evily) Hehe (walks into Links room)

Link: Hey

Twilight: (freezes in her place)

Link: That's my pizza (drools all over the pillow)

Twilight: (sighs) Link……Link wake up…..LINK!!(hits him with the bat)

Link: (screams like a girl)

Midna: O.O I'm just going to walk away now

Link: Twilight?! What are you doing here 4 in the moring!?

Twilight: Read and answer this review

Link: Ugh whatever I just want to go back to sleep. Oh god it's from INUGIRL again

_**T-THANK YOU FOR DOING MY REVIEW AUTHOR-SAN!AND MIDNA YOU L-LIE TO ME.I KNEW WHAT YOU WERE GOING TO SAY.YOU WERE ABOUT TO TELL LINK YOU...YOU...L-LOVE HIM,RIGHT?(BEGIN TO CRY).LINK I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!IT'S OK IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I LOOK LIKE,BUT I HAVE BROWN HAIR AND GREEN EYES.YOU CAN EVEN SAY I LOOK LIKE ZELDA A LITTLE.SORRY IF I MADE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE WITH MY QUESTIONS.I STILL HAVE SOME MORE QUESTION AUTHOR-SAN.**_

FIRST QUESTON:SHEIK SINCE YOU ARE A GIRL AND PART OF ZELDA DO YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR LINK,TOO?

SECOND QUESTION:LINK,WILL YOU...WILL YOU...PLEASE MEET WITH ME?

THIRD QUESTION:LINK,WHO DO YOU LOVE?DO YOU L-LOVE MIDNA?

BYE.

Twilight: Author San?

Link: O.O I'm officially scared. But green eyes brown hair? Nice combo.

Midna: I NEVER LOVED HIM!

Twilight: Well that was a sudden outburst. Are you sure?

Midna: Totally

Link: I'm feeling part way. Part of me wants to be nice and meet you and another part is telling me run away or something ugly will happen but what the heck I'll meet with you next chapter.

Twilight: I said twilight princess characters and since Sheik isnt in there Link cant answer it. Sorry (Twilight princess is the only Zelda game I've played XD)

Link: I DO NOT LOVE MIDNA!!

Twilight: Then who do you love?

Link: (blushes)

Midna: Well?

Link: (mumbles)

Twilight: cant hear you

Link: MY 5th GRADE TEACHER!!

Twilght and Midna: Uhh……..

Midna: I think you need a new girlfriend.

Link: (sigh) can I go to bed now?

Twilight: No there is one more review for you

Link: ARRGGGHHH!!

Midna: SHHH!! Do you want Lk17 to wake up?

Twilight; Do you remember what happen last time we did a chapter without her?

Link: (flashes back)

_Link: (crying under the table)_

Link: yeah I remember clearly.

Midna: So read the review

_**Umm link- has he ever had a girlfriend? LOL that's what i wanna ask!**_

Link: Are you people having fun by toying with my heart?

Midna: Just answer the freaking question

Link: NO! HAPPY?!

Twilight: dude chill

Link; get out of my room

Twilight: Whatever let's go Midna and for the last time SHUT THE CAMERA OFF!!

Midna: No it's mine!

Twilight: Give me the camera Midna!

Midna: NO! (Warps to another place)

Twilight: Midna? Oh well (falls asleep on the couch)

Out of no where a Twilian rock falls from the sky and hits Twilight

Twilight: MIDNA!!


	3. Chapter 3

Twilight: EEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPP!!

Link: Twilight?

Twilight: Look at all the reviews we got!

Midna: It cant be that many- whoa

Ilia: Yep that is alot.

Zelda: Now tell them the bad news

Twilight: Lk17 said she didnt want to be part of this story anymore (sniff)

Everyone: (whispering) YES!

Twilight: So that's why someone offered to take her place!

Keroanne1: Hi everyone!

Everyone: (twitching)

Keroanne1: (grins evily)

Link: (crying)

Ilia: Oh well bring it on

Twilight: Good, now lets begin

Zelda: Do we have to?

Keroanne1: Here you go Twilight

Twilight: (Takes the machine gun) You were saying?

Everyone: TWILIGHT DOES NOT OWN ZELDA!!

Twilight: Now Link you read the first review

Link: But-

Twilight: (points gun at him)

Link: Ok! Where is that review? Oh here it is it's from Jane 'O Callaghan and she is asking

_**Lol, this is hilarious! Hmm, I think I'll ask Ilia a question! I don't think anyone has asked her a question yet. Ok, Ilia, do you actually like Link, or do you just pretend to be his friend so that you can be with his horse?**_

And you said we could do dares too, right? So... I dare Link to have a tea party with Agitha, the creepy bug girl! And dress up is required, because she seems the sort of person who would enjoy forcing Link into pretty dresses! Muhahaha! (Sorry Link!)

Ilia: (blushes) I uh...

Link: This is just like that chapter in "Torrturing Link" where she asked me the same question.

Ilia: (mumbles)

Twilight: (pulls out gun) SPEAK LOUD ENOUGH SO I CAN HEAR YOU!

Ilia: YES I LIKE HIM! (I'm a LinkxIlia shipper XD)

Link: O.O (backs away)

Keroanne1: Uh... AAAAAWWWWWWW!!

Link: (re-reads the review) WHAT!? I HAVE TO GO TO A TEA PARTY!?

Midna: HAHAHAH!! Tough luck Link!

Zelda: If you want I could give you one of my dresses! (laughs)

Link: There is no WAY I will do that

Keraoanne1: (pulls out pistol)

Link: I wonder which one will go with my eyes

Midna: Uhh...I'LL RECORD IT!

Twilight: (blinks) You still have that camera?

Midna: No...(loooks around)

Zelda: Here Link wear this! (gives him a frilly dress)

Link: (takes the dress) But Agitha is not here!

Ilia: Actually she is (opens a door revealing Agitha) Twilight text messaged her earlier

Link: Text message?

Twilight: Yeah! I'm getting faster by the second!

Agitha: Wow! We are going to have soooo much fun arent we Link?

Keroanne1: Have fun you two! (snickers) Link, your underwear goes under the pantyhose (snickers)

Link: AWW!-

Midna: (slaps Link) LANGUAGE!

Link: Whatever

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**2 Hours later**

Agitha: That was far the WORST Tea party I ever been too! HMPH!

Ilia: geez what did you do?

Link: Uhh...

Midna: I'll show you what he did (plugs in camera too T.V)

_Agitha: (talking about something I do not feel like writing about)_

_Link: (asleep)_

_Agitha: Link are you listeing?_

_Link: Yes, yes I do feel like that the mosquito is related to the fly (RANDOM! XD)_

_Agitha: I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE LAW OF GRAVITY! This is the worst party I've ever been to and you are a TERRIBLE listener_

_Link: (looking at the sky) What?_

Twilight: Is the mosquito really related to the fly?

Keroanne1: Twilight focus!

Twilight: Oh right who talks about the laws of gravity?

Keroanne1: (Sighs)

Zelda: Ok. That was just plain weird. NEXT REVIEW!

Twilight: Midna You read it

Midna: Ok it's from Sargeras111 and he says

_**So... I have some questions here and as creator of the burning legion... I DEMAND ANSWERS! 1st: If Zant is around i want to ask him a question. Were you in love with Midna? 2nd: Midna since you deatroyed the mirror... How the hell did you come back? 3rd: Link do you intend to choose girl some bloody day? (Don't worry i'm a guy and i'm straight) Thank you. And remember... I created the burning legion! ( See warcraft 3 The frozen throne for details)**_

Link: Again with this question??

Midna: Zant isnt here

Twilight: I can text message him!!

Midna:?? Through another dimension?

Twilight: Dont worry I got long distance!

Midna: (collapses)

Ilia: Next question!

Midna: I got dragged over here by Twilight from my ear (stares at Twilight)

Twilight: (Watching a fly) What?

Link: Of course I intend to choose a girl!

Keroanne1: The day you choose a girl is the day I become Pyhcic

Twilight: I'm already Pyhcic! You want to see your future Link? (makes a bad imatation of Raven Baxter) I see in your future you will grow old, die alone and never get married

Everyone: (snickering)

Link: Shut up

Zant: ICE CREAM!!

Everyone: AHHH!! HE HAS COME TO KILL US!! Oh wait it's just you

Zant: Ice cream! Twilight said there was Ice cream here!

Zelda: You came all this way from the Twilight realm just for ice cream?

Zant: Yeah why?

Ilia: (sighs)

Midna: Answer this question Zant (hands him the review)

Zant: (reads the review) I never loved her BUT I"M ALWAYS OPEN!

Midna: Excuse me while I barf for a moment (gags) Dang nothing

Link: Ok Next review!

Twilight: Ok now you read it Ilia (pauses) Ilia?

Ilia: (sleeping)

Twilight: Would you do the honors Keroanne1? (hands her baseball bat)

Keroanne1: Certanly (hit Ilia square on the head)

Ilia: (falls on the floor still sleeping)

Zelda: Is she that deep?

Twilight: (Fires an air horn)

Ilia: OH MY SWEET MOTHER AND ALL THAT IS HOLY!!

Twilight: READ THE REVIEW!

Ilia: It's from marium and she is asking

_**that was funny! 1 question for Shiek: does Shiek enjoy doing the chicken dance and the can-can if so can Shiek do it please?**_

Link: Do you Zelda?

Zelda: Why are you looking at me for?

Midna: It says Sheik

Zelda: Uhh...

Keroanne1: ROLE THE FOOTAGE!

_Zelda: (Doing the chicken dance) WHEE!! (radio changes music) Ooh! It's the can-can! Can-can, Can you do the can-can? (dont know the rest of the song :P)_

Ilia: Zelda, I'm saying this because I care about you, did you ever suggest taking therapy?

Zelda: I really hate this fic

Link: Tell me about it

Midna: Well those were all the people who reviews dares and questions

Keroanne1: It went by that fast already?

Twilight: Yup

Zelda: Now what?

Twilight: Rianix! Come here boy!

Everyone: EVERYONE DUCK IN COVER!!

Keroanne1: Whose Rianix? (gets flattend by a massive black dragon)

Link: That's Rianix

Midna: Look out

Keroanne1: A little late for that dont you presume?


	4. Chapter 4

Twilight: (dancing)

Link: Uhhhhh……….?

Keroanne1: Twilight? You know the cameras on right?

Twilight: AHHHHH!! I FEEL EXPOSED TURN IT OFF!!

Midna: Sorry! I forgot the camera was on!

Zelda: Whatever just tell them the news

Twilight: WE HAVE A NEW HOST!! Shadow Archer!!

Shadow: What's up everyone?

Ilia: Now let's get to the reviews this is from-

Keroanne1: (slaps her)

Twilight: Thank you. You can read the first one Shadow

Shadow : Aww! I feel loved! It's from _**Nakori Elvenbon**_ and he is asking

_**Ok be ready for some dares Link, Zelda and Midna. but first some questions,**_

Link, Whats your favorite color? Food? And what was it like to be a wolf?

Zelda, Whats the hardestthing about being a queen? I Dare you to Kiss Ganondorf!

Midna, is it fun having hair that can strangle people? whats it like to ride Links back? I dare you to sing i'm a little tea pot while danceing to it.

Now for Links dare: I Dare you Link to be tied to Keroanne1 for a whole hour. While dressed as legolas from Lord of the rings XD

Twilight: WE CAN DO THAT!

Link: What? (thinks) NO!

Zelda; What's your favorite color?

Link: green duh

Ilia: What was it like being a wolf?

Link: (scratching his ear with is leg) What?

Midna: Favorite food?

Link: PIZZA!

Keroanne1: Ok Zelda what was the hardest thing about being a queen?

Zelda: Being captured by Ganondorf all the time

Shadow: Oh yeah the second part

Twilight: I'm on it! (presses random buttons on her cell phone)

Ilia: (sweatdrops anime style) Text message?

Twilight: You bet!

Zelda: Ok Midna Your turn!

Midna: (brushing her hair) Of course it's fun to have hair that can strangle people! (Midna's in her imp form in this fic)

Twilight, Keroanne1 Shadow: (smiles evily)

Midna: Why are you looking at me like that?

All 3 hosts: ROLL THE FOOTAGE!!

_(Midna's in her room jumping on her bed)_

_Midna: I'm bored……I know!! (plays the little teapot) I'm a little teapot short and stout here is my-_

Midna: Let me guess…..camera?

Twilight: Uhh…..(points at Shadow and runs)

Ganondorf: I'm HERE!!

Link: HE IS GOING TO KIIIIIIIIIIIIILL US!!

Keroanne1: Pipe down…..Ganondorf I think we explained everything

Ganondorf: (stares at Zelda)

Zelda: Oh geez

Ilia: Pucker up!

Midna: Shadow what are you doing?

Shadow: I'm going to take a picture of them

Zelda: (smiles) Close your eyes Gannypoo (grabs a fish)

Viewers at home: (staring at the computer drooling) RANDOM!! (I'm a random person)

Ganondorf: (closes his eyes)

Link: Ewwww………

Ganondorf: (kisses the fish Zelda has) Him…A little salty but worth it!

Zelda: (gags)

Shadow: (snaps the picture of Ganondorf kissing the fish)

Twilight: QUICK TO THE INTERNET!!

Keroanne1: (reads the review) If he gets tied to me (pulls out shotgun) And talks(cocks shotgun) He is going to get it

Link: (Ties himself to Keroanne1) Twilight does not know who "Legolas" is so I cant dress up as her SORRY!

Ilia: Oooookkaayyyy Net review! It's from _**Hakusgirl Katsuko **_and she is asking

_**LOL okay um who was Midna's first crush?**_

Midna: Don't get me started It was this DREAMY Twilian boy in high school and-

Twilight: OK! That's enough NEEEXXXXTTTTT!!

Keroanne1: I'll read it!! If fattie over here can move while I walk IT WOULD BE EASIER!

Link: Oh sorry

Keroanne1: It's from _**The Deimon Commander of Hell **_and he is asking

_**HAHAHAHA! I wanna join in, but it looks like you're full right now. If you want, I can join with my Devil's Handbook, which has blackmail information on everyone in the world (yes, including you, the author). Okay, here's my question for Link: Who do you like the most out of ALL the Zelda games (Sorry this isn't really about Twilight...)**_

Twilight: Yeah we kind of are full….sorry

Link: Doesn't everyone know who I like?? READ THE STORY A NIGHTMARE AND THEN YOU'LL FIND OUT

Navi: PEEKABOO!!

Twilight: Hi Navi!

Ilia: You invited Navi?

Shadow: Problem?

Midna: No WE HAVE ANOTHER GIRL!

Navi: Alright! I want to torture Link too!

Zelda: You do realize what you've done right?

Navi: Yes it's something I was willing to take YOU CAN REVIEW ON ME TOO NOW!

Twilight: Ok I'll read the next it's from……..? Uh…You Shadow

Shadow: Really? Read it!

_**Okay...(thinks) I know! Link, borrow the postman's suit and wear it for one day with the whole crew! That suit is so funny but so makes me want to gag at the same time! Zelda, do you like Link? (Sorry, couldn't resist.)**_

Keroanne1; I have to be tied to him while he is wearing that thing??

Navi: Basically yeah

Link: But Twilight kept on laughing everytime he gave me a letter during the game!

Twilight: (takes out mallet) Wear it

Link: I'm wearing it

Shadow: Good NEXT!

Midna: I'll read it. It's from _**Kaiser Aldamon**_

_**ok here's mine:  
Hey Link you're my favorite character so i'm not going to torture you pauses and waits for Link to either sigh of relief or bow at my feet or anything that Twilight thinks of instead i'm going to torture Midna and Zelda BWAHA i have dares not questions grins evily Zelda i dare you to go skiny dipping in front of Link, and for Midna i dare you to dress up as a penguin and go to Jamaica everyone knows they hate penguins duh**_

Link: YES! YES THANK YOU!!

Keroanne1: (hits him with a baseball bat)

Zelda: I WHAT!? Twilight You cant be serious I have to do this?

Twilight: Well a dare is a dare

Zelda: Fine (goes skinny dipping in front of Link)

Link: (staring)

Ilia: (slaps him) COVER YOUR EYES!

Shadow: Here you go Midna (gives her penguin outfit) go to Jamaica

Midna: Twwiiillligggghhhttttt

Navi: Just wear it

Midna: Your just lucky nobody reviewed anything for you

Navi: Shut up

Twilight: Go to Jamaica

MidnaL Fine but if I get eaten IT WAS ALL YOUR FAULT

Navi: AND NOW FOR THE COMMENTS!!

_**Keroanne1: YES! That was freaking awesome! I had guns!**_

_**Jane O' Callaghan: Rofl, this is just so funny! Thanks for using my review!  
I can just see Sheik doing the chicken dance, lol**_

_**Hakusgirl Katsuko: OMG GREAT CHAPTER! i was laughing so hard, great job as usual!**_

Shadow: Untill next time BYYYEEE!!

Viewers at home: (taking back to the computer like idiots)

Twilight; Rianiiiixxxx!! Here boy!

Everyone: RRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!

Navi: Whose Rianix?


	5. Chapter 5

Keroanne1: WWWWEEE'RRREEEE BACK!!

Twilight: Sorry this took so long because SOMEONE (stares at Navi)

Navi: What?

Shadow: She kept annoying Twilight so she took out a pistol and things got ugly with the Hyrule police

Link: (sighs)

Ilia: (Whispers in Twilight ears)

Twilight: What!? NO! She has to be in at least 2 chapters

Zelda: But Twiiiilllliiiiigggggghhhhttttt SHE ANNOYING!!

Navi: Hey guys! Look! Listen!! #ing! LISTEN!!

Midna: Navi! Where did you learn that word?

Keroann1: AAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNYYYYYYYYYYWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAYYYYY

Shadow: Let's start with the reviews already

Twilight: I'LL READ IT!! It's from _**Kaiser Almond**_ and she is asking

_**laughs evily that was good  
anyway got questions for Link:  
1. what does it feel like to transform into a wolf (the transformation part not actually being a wolf)  
2. what happens to your clothes when you become a wolf? seriously i've always wondered where they go when you go wolf  
3. what's it like having Midna ride you (get your mind out of the gutter people!)  
anyway dares for Zelda:  
1. grins pure evilly bear Link's child (no you can't kill it have an abortion, sell it, get rid off it etc.)  
dares for Midna:  
1. how was Jamica?  
2. kiss michael jackson  
3. throw Ilia into a wall and go Jackie Chan on her  
dares for Ilia:  
1. jump off a cliff into pointy spikes  
2. lock yourself in a room with michael jackson, barney, and the teletubbies for 1 day  
question for Navi:  
1. are you just a glowing blue ball with wings or actual fairy that just gives out a blue glow so we can't see you?  
2...do you even wear clothes?! or does the light just pretty much get rid of that need**_

Ilia: By the looks of my dares I think she hates me

Link: transforming HURTS!! Its worst then being dipped in acid!

3 hosts: (smiles evilly) Really? (pulls out transforming rock)

Navi: Yeah I want to know where your clothes go too

Link: I have no idea

Everyone: (stares at Midna)

Midna: What?

Zelda: What's it like having Midna ride on you?

Link: She kicks me every 5 seconds!

Shadow: I see

Zelda: I HAVE T BEAR HIS CHILD!?

Twilight: (throws up on Midna)

Midna: eeeeeeewwwwwwwwwww (shudders)

Keroanne1: IN THE ROOM YOU TWO GO!! (throws them into a room)

Midna: Jamaica? (shudders) THEY TRIED TO EAT ME!!

Twilight: (text messaging someone)

Ilia: Who are you talking to? (door burst open)

Michael Jackson: HELLO!!

Shadow: Ok Midna PUCKER UP!!

Michael Jackson: What!? EW!

Midna: What's so "EW" about me?

Michael Jackson: Nothing it's just……………..I'm gay

Keroanne1: (pulls out flame thrower) GET OUT!!

Midna: ooohhhh I'm going to like this (throws Ilia to a wall and does karate moves on her)

Ilia: (arm breaks) AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!

Twilight: Oh boy CODE RED! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!

Shadow: Because Ilia broke her arm she cant do her dares sorry

Navi: I'm not just a glowing ball! I'm a beautiful fairy but I use the glow so guys don't get perverted BECAUSE I DON'T WEAR CLOTHES

Midna: Well she answered your question (door opens and Link and Zelda come out)

Ilia: (vomits on Midna)

Midna: AGAIN?!

Zelda: (stomach popping out)

Keroann1: (eyes bulge out) Are you…………?

Zelda: uhh heh heh Yeah

Everyone including viewers: (barfs on Midna)

Midna: (holding an umbrella) HAH!

Twilight: (passes out)

Zelda: MY WATER BROKE!

Link: Quick to the hospital!!

Keroanne1: I'll take you!

Link: What? No! No it's ok really

Keroanne1: I'm taking you whether you like it or not!! (drives to the nearest hospital)

Twilight: (wakes up again) What did I miss?

Navi: The miracle of birth

Keroanne1: (heard all the way from the hospital) WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S A FAKE!! (explosion)

Shadow: Uuuhhhh…………..

Ilia: I'm hungry

Link Zelda Keroanne1: (comes inside the studio)

Link: Well we made it that far

Midna: (sighs) I'll read the next one. It's from _**Jane O' Callaghan**_ and she is asking

__

_**Lol, I just love this fic! Ok, I have another question for Ilia! ...Yes, she is my favorite character so I'm going to be bugging her a lot :-D Ok, Ilia, if and when you take over the mayor job from your father, what will be your first rule/order?**_

And my younger brother had a question for Midna: Midna, what is your favorite type of pet? You're my fav character by the way! :-

Ilia: My first rule would be…….To enter the village you must have a horse!

Everyone: (sweat-drops anime style)

Midna: My favorite animal? Hmmm…… They Twilian Kimikon!

Everyone: WWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT??

Navi: As much as I would love to find out what that is I'll read the next review. It's from _**nazo **_and he is asking

_**I have a question and a dare for Navi. navi do you love link and navi I dare you to kiss link. link I dare you to tern into a wolf and bite shadow and shadow I dare you to light wolf links tail on fire**_

Navi: Uuuhhhhhh?? NO I DON'T LOVE HIM!

Link: WHY WOULD I LOVE SUCH AN ANNOYING PERSON LIKE HER!!

Navi: (re reads the review) I have to what?? Oh fine! (kisses Link)

Keroanne1: I got the snapshot! Quick lets make rumors! (runs away)

Link: Ooohhh I'm going to like this! Turn me into a wolf Midna!

Midna: (turns Link into a wolf)

Wolf Link: (smiles and bites Shadow)

Shadow: Hey OW! Oh yeah? I'm REALLY going to enjoy this (lights his tail on fire)

Wolf Link: AWO AWO AWO!! (howls in pain)

Ilia: Haha now thats what I call comedy!!

Twilight: Ok Midna Turn him back

Midna: I'll read the next review it's from _**My Final Death **_and he is asking

_**Hello You may call me Sharon.**_  
_**I dare Ilia to wear stripper clothes and to wash Epona with soap suds all sexy like XD And Link has to watch. And if he has ANY reaction whatsoever, even a GRIN, Midna gets to slap him :3 **_

__

_**As for Zelda... I dare Zelda to put up Navi for a full day. XD**_

Keroanne1: Nice review but we have to change one thing

Shadow: Instead of stripper clothes………She will wear a black bikini

Ilia: WHAT!!

Link: (Grins slyly)

Midna: (slaps him) This will be fun

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**2 hours later**

Minda: My hand hurts

Link: My face hurts

Ilia: I had a good time

Navi: Wow this is the first

Zelda: There ya go folks Link had to be slap 5,000 times in these two hours

Twilight: As for the second part Heh heh Um……That person has to PM me what they mean because I don't understand

Ilia: This next one is the last review and it's from _**Nakori Elvenborn**___and SHE is asking

_**Bawahahaha, ok that was awsome. And im a she  
now for more evil things: I dare Link to wear a pink tunic and sing auqa's Barbie girl. ( i am sorry link, but i have to do this, my sisters have a wooden sword at my back as i type this.)**_

Navi: He he, wooden sword

Shadow: Zelda do you have anything pink for Link to wear?

Zelda: Sure do! (gives him a mini skirt)

Midna: Eww don't you ever shave your legs Link?

Twilight: (Takes out the master sword) SING YOU LITTLE MONKEY!!

Link: AAHH!! _Im a Barbie girl. In a Barbie world! Life in plastic, is fantastic! You can brush my hair! Undress me anywear! Imagination Life is your creation!_

Keroanne1 and Shadow: (shudders) So……Gay

Ilia: And now for the comments!

_**Shadow Archer:**_ _**That...was...SWEET! I couldn't stop laughing! Ha! I got a pic of Ganondorf kissing a fish. Ah, pure gold. Thanks a lot and it is so funny! Can't wait till next chapter!**_

_**The Deimon Commander from Hell: Rofl...no questions this time.**_

_**Keroanne1: YES! I had guns, yet again! That was so funny! And fun! -grins evilly at Link- I like this.  
-Waves to Twilight and Shadow- Hiya!**_

_**Hakusgirl Katsuko: **__**omg good chappie. I cracked up at the end! I can't think of Any dares or anything tho... sorry my brain isn't working.. good chappie tho!**_

Twilight: (sniff) I'm so proud of myself

Navi: You mean like the time you took a test thought you got a 68 and got a 69

Twilight: Shut up


	6. Chapter 6

Twilight: (playing with electrical wires)

Keroanne1: No I'm pretty sure red goes with blue.

Shadow: Your both wrong, red goes with green.

Twilight: Will you be quiet? (Does something with the wires)

Keroanne1 and Shadow: NO DON'T TOUCH THE- (explosion)

Twilight: Whoa……LET'S DO THAT AGAIN!!

Link: Are you guys finished yet?

Zelda: Yeah we have something to do ya know

Twilight: What Oh yeah! Hi everyone!

Midna: Why were you randomly playing with the electrical wires?

3 Hosts: (looks around suspiciously)

Ilia: Ready to read the reviews?

Shadow: But I don't wanna worrrrrkkkkk……………

Navi: We get to eat Ice cream later

Shadow: I'm coming!

Link: Alright here is the first review it's from-

Twilight: WAIT!!

Zelda: What!? What happened!?

Twilight: Before we start with the REAL reviews I want to show you how stupid I can be at some points…look it's from _**Kaiser Spartan**_ and look what he said

_**hand twitches...Kaiser ALMOND!...wtf i'm A GUY! I'M GOING TO SHIP YOU OFF TO CUBA IN A CRATE WITH MICHAEL JACKSON AND BARNEY!**_

Everyone except Twilight: (laughing their heads off)

Twilight: (sigh) Oh well I have an excuse I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!

Navi: Can we get to the REAL reviews now?

Keroanne1: Ok Link you read it

Link: It's from _**FallenRose19 **_and she is asking

_**ello govna ;P  
I'm reading your "story"!! I was laughing so hard I literally fell out of my  
chair...ow.  
And I wanted to send you some questions with PM instead. Not sure why but...  
Anyways, ahem...  
1 Link, you have millions of fan girls, but your "love interests" in the game  
Twilight Princess are Midna, Zelda, and Ilia. I've heard the creators saying  
that Zelda is gonna be your official love interest. Is this true? O.O  
2 Link why are you talking now when you could only grunt and yell in the  
games?  
3 Zelda, I love your new look! Who does your hair?  
4 Midna...I like you better as a little chick than a tall lady...do you look  
like that right now?  
5 Link, I dare you to sing Big Girls Don't Cry. (ug I hate that song)  
FallenRose19  
p.s. enclosed is Sonic the Hedgehog**_

Twilight: YEAH! Another fan!!

Shadow: Hey Link you really DO have a lot of fangirls. But people like Zelink better….Do you?

Link: Well I cant ask this question

Midna: Why not?

Zelda: Because if he answered it people will flame Twilight saying another couple is better.

Twilight: And I don't want FLAMES do I?

Ilia: So Link How come you're talking now but could only grunt or yell in the games?

Link: (shudders and has a flashback)

_Twilight: (in a doctors mask) Now just relax while I slit your throat open_

_Link: Ahh? AHHH!!_

_Twilight: HOLD STILL!! _

_Link: Ayai!_

_Twilight: What?_

_Link: (grunts)_

_Twilight: (stares at him blankly then takes out her "doctor things"" It's time to fix you_

Navi: Oh so that's how it happened NEXT!!

Zelda: I got this new stylist and she told me I was using too much conditioner so I-

Everyone: (snores)

Zelda: HEY!

Keroanne1: So Midna, do you like being an Imp or a human?

Midna: AN IMP IS WAY BETTER!! I can annoy Link more!!

3 hosts: (setting up singing equipment)

Ilia: What's that for?

Shadow: Well in the review it said she wanted Link to sing

Keroanne1: AND GOSH DARNIT HE'S GOING TO SING!!

Twilight: (Takes out battle axe)

Link: Umm…. Is it just me or do you girls like watching me sing?

TWILIGHT: SING DANG IT!! (takes out machine gun)

Link: Ok OK!! _ Lalalala the smell of your skin lingers on me. Your probably on your flight back to your home town. I need some shelter for my own protection baby!_

Everyone: EEWW EWW CUT IT OUT!!

Link: (stares at everyone) lalaa the smell of your skin-

Shadow and Keroanne1: (fire up a chainsaw)

Link: Ok I'll be quiet now

Navi: Thanks FallenRose19!

Ilia: Ok this next one is from _**Loyal traitor **_and he/she (not making a mistake this time HAH!) is asking

_**... Whoa... I think I'm in shock. Too much info flowing to the brainie...  
OOH, Dare time. I dare Midna to be locked up in a room with Navi for one hour and she can't kill the fairy. Also, question for, well, anyone with this ability. Where does all your equipment, weapons, **_

_**clothes, inventory go when you're not using it? I mean, c'mon Link, how do ya carry that big ball & chain in your pocket? Kinda awkward if ya ask me.**_

;)

Midna: I have to WHAT!?

Zelda: Allow me (throws them into a random room)

Twilight: (getting nervous) umm… Zelda? That's the wrong room

Zelda: Really? What room is that then?

Midna and Navi: AHHH!! HELP!! TORTURE CAMBER!! (pause) DESIGNED BY WALT DISNEY!!

Everyone even Keroann1 and Shadow: (stare at Twilight) WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?

Twilight: (evil chuckle) Take them out of that room and put them somewhere else

Ilia: Link?

Link: Yeah?

Ilia: Where does that heavy ball/chain thing go when you're done using it?

Keroanne1: I think he puts it up his-

Shadow: OK! No need to finish that idea

Zelda: Let's see how Midna and Navi doing (turns on a TV)

Navi: HeyMidnalistenigotanideaofhowwecangetoutofhereheylookapassagewayLOOKMIDNALOOK!!

Midna: (twitching) GET ME OUT OF HERE!!

Twilight: Ok next review!

Ilia: It's from _**DraeTheRaven **_and _**he/she**_ (Mwhaha) is asking

_**Okay just a few things I wanna say. That last chapter was gold, what a rush! Second, I have couple of questions and dares for some best Zelda characters ever!(other characters don't kill me!)**_

The first 2 are for anyone

1.If any had to spend 3 days locked in a closet with at least 5 friends who would they be?  
2.#2 is is the same as #1 only what 5 enemies would there be?  
3. Link, did feel after Navi kissed you (sorry I went there I had to know).  
Zelda,how was it when your soul was inside Midna?

__

_**DARES**_

Midna, dress up and act like Mini Me from Austin Powers for the rest of the chapter.  
Zelda give Link a makeover while he's sleeping.  
Link, I dare you and Zelda to sing High School Musical's 'Bop to the Top' (and yes you have to dress like Sharpay and Ryan).

That's all I got so far, see ya!

Twilight: I know who my friends would be!

Ilia: Don't say it because we know

Link: A chainsaw

Zelda: A flamethrower

Keroanne1: A shotgun

Shadow: And your Wii

Twilight: Don't forget Rianix!

Everyone: (sigh)

Zelda: I know who my 5 enemies would be. My ex-stylist, Ganondorf, Zant and clowns.

Ilia: Clowns?

Zelda: Yeah. Haven't you seen the movie "It?"

Ilia: Actually no I haven't

Shadow: Ok let's see how Midna's doing (turns on TV)

Midna: (has a paintball gun) SHUT UP!!

Navi: AHHH!! GET ME OUT!!

Link: I think we should let them out

Everyone: True

Keroanne1: (opens the door and Midna comes out)

Midna: THAT WAS MORE THAN AN HOUR!! All that time I heard this Hey! Look! Listen!

Shadow: Whatever Zelda answer your question

Zelda: Well when I was inside Midna it felt all mushy and I think I felt her stomach

Midna and Link: That was you giving me/her stomach problems??

Link: BECAUSE OF YOU MIDNA KEPT TROWING UP ON ME!

Zelda: hhehe sorry….

Navi: Twilight doesn't know who "Mini Me" is

Twilight: But I do know High school musical! (Gives Link and Zelda outfits)

Shadow: (holds up Grim reapers scythe) SING YOU OVER GROWN MONKEYS!!

Link and Zelda: (sweat drops and start singing)

Twilight: (throws a tomato) What? Sorry it's just that I don't like High school Musical

Link: How can she give me a makeover when I'm awake?

Ilia: LIKE THIS! (hits Link with a bat making him fall unconscious) Nighty-night

Midna: give him a beard!

Navi: And pimples!

Keroanne1: Make it look like you hurt him!

Zelda: Alright! Alright! (Draws on Link's face) There isn't he beautiful? (Snickers)

Link: (Wakes up and looks into the mirror) AHH! IT'S THE BOOGIE MAN!!

Ilia: Well that was pleasant NEXT!

Twilight: WAIT!

Everyone: WHAT!!

Twilight: What's that up there? Is that an anvil?

Midna: Maybe you should check and see

Twilight; (climbs up a ladder) Hey hey WHOA!! (falls off the ladder) I'm OK!! (Anvil falls on her head)

Keroanne1: Twilight?

Shadow: Are you ok?

Link: Quick, we must bury her body before we're discovered

Everyone: (Stares at Link)

Ilia: No wait she's getting up

Twilight: Ow……what happened?

Zelda: You fell off a ladder and got hit with an anvil

Twilight: Oh ok….one more question who are all you people?

Navi: haha good one Twilight now come on

Twilight: Who's Twilight?

Shadow: Umm… I think she has amnesia

Everyone: (runs around in circles)

Link: (stares into the camera) YOU! YES YOU! HELP US GET TWILIGHTS MEMORY BACK!!

Zelda: SEND IN A REVIEW THAT MIGHT HELP!!

Shadow: Wait we already have one!

Ilia: We do?

Shadow: Yeah! It's from _**keybladeboy **_and he is asking

_**Hehe, pretty good story so far. And now for the DARES! evil laugh of evilness**_

Link: I dare you to be locked up in a room with those three fangirls outside of Purlo's tent, Malo, Talo, Beth, AND the Postman!! no offense, you are one of my favorite characters Also, what is your favorite piece of equipment?

Zelda: I dare you to...JOIN ILIA IN WASHING EPONA! And repeat the process, Midna!

Twilight Yeah, Twilight: I dare you to let Midna be the author for the chapter!! Also, why is it that all authors suddenly turn into sadistic jackasses when they write these kinds of stories?

Navi: I dare you to stand in front of that wall while EVERYONE throws stuff at you and/or beats you up!! I HATE YOU FOREVER! And why are you so annoying?

Oh, one more thing. If you'd like, I can contribute some knowledge on other Zelda games, in exchange for being a part of the story.

Link: What? Three fangirls AND the postman? NOW THAT'S JUST CRUEL! TT

Keroanne1: In you go! (throws them into a room)

Link: AHHHH!! GET ME OUT OF HERE!!

Beth: Come on Link let's play rescue the princess!

Zelda: (reading the review) I have to wash Epona?

Ilia: It's not SO bad (gives her a brush)

Zelda (Sigh)

Ilia: You have to do it to Midna

Midna: (collapses)

Twilight: Who is Midna?

Midna: I'M MIDNA!!

Twilight: AAAAAHHHHHHHH!! IT'S HIDEOUS!!

Everyone except Midna: (snickers)

Midna: Oh yeah? Guess what? I'm the new author for the rest of the chapter!

Twilight: What's an author?

Keroanne1: TWILIGHT IS NOT A SADISTIC JACKASS SHE HAPPENS TO BE THIS WAY IN REAL LIFE

Twilight: Who are you little person?

Keroanne1: Now I'm starting to get annoyed

Midna: Ok Navi! Up against the wall!

Navi: What? (Gets pelted by food) HEY QUIT IT!!

Twilight: Hey this looks like fun! (grabs a tomato)

Link: Ok this next review is from _**Midna3452**_ and he/she is asking

_**Lol! This is FREAKIN' HILARIOUS! Okay, I have a dare for Link. I dare you to make out with Zant for ten minutes while wearing a pink lace bikini! (Sorry Link, i couldn't resist)**_

Link: (re-reads the review) WHAT??

Shadow: Instead of ten min it's going to be ten seconds (because that's disgusting)

Zelda: Here you go Link (gives him a pink lace bikini)

Twilight: Haha green person looks funny

Shadow: looks like she still has amnesia

Midna: (text messaging Zant) Twilight was right this is fun!

Zant: I'm here!

Twilight: OMG IT'S EVEN MORE UGLY!!

Ilia: Well you know what to do

Zelda: But to make this less disgusting can you put him in a room?

Midna: Sure (throws them into a room)

Keroanne1: And now for the countdown!

Everyone: 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 0!

Link: (bursts out of the room)

Zant: Oh come on Link! We were just staring to have some fun!

Everyone even Twilight; (stares at Zant)

Twilight: EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWW HE'S GAY!!

Ilia: can I read the next review?

Twilight: What's a review?

Navi: She's staring to get more annoying than me

Everyone: So you finally admitted it?

Ilia: It's from _**Jane O' Callaghan **_and she is asking

_**Lol! Link singing a barbie song...so funny!  
Ok, I have yet another question for Ilia! How would you punish a person that was entering the village without a horse?  
I also have a question for Midna: Is that really creepy smile you do in the game your natural smile, or are you just trying to freak Link out?  
And here's my annoying little brother again! Yay.  
Jane's annoying little brother: (glares at Jane) Hiya! I have a dare for Zelda! I dare you to turn your beautiful castle into a nice big home for all the stray cats that are in your kingdom (and that includes the ones at that old Kakariko Village). You also have to take care of them all...with no help!**_

Ilia: If they didn't have a horse I get to crucify them!

Everyone: WHAT!! (Goes and gets a horse)

Midna: (smiling)

Link: (getting freaked out)

Midna: That answer your question?

Twilight: (also getting freaked out)

Zelda: MY BEAUTIFUL CASTLE A HOME FOR PETS??

Navi: Press the eject button!

Keroanne1: (presses button)

Zelda: I CAN FLY!! Oh wait no I can't (falls right in front of her castle) Oh I'm here (sigh) HERE KITTY KITTY! (thousands of cats come)

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**3 hours later**

Zelda: (covered in fur) HAPPY?? (gags) Hairball

Midna: Eww…..NEXT REVIEW!

Twilight: What's a-

Everyone: Don't say it

Navi: It's from _**The Deimon Commander of Helland **_he is asking

_**Takes out my Devil's Handbook-  
It's time to get some more information for this book.**_

Link: WHY do you put up with Navi instead of kicking Navi out?  
Zelda: WHY do you put up with Link's stubborness?

-Holds up pencil, about to put it on paper-  
I'm waiting...

Link: Because she knows where I live and WHO KNOWS WHAT SHE'LL DO

Zelda: Because it's useless they'll make another game and I'll get stuck with him again anyway

Twilight: Awww look a puppy!!

Keroanne1: Drastic times call for drastic measures this last review is from _**Kasier Spartan**_ and HE is asking

_**alright i forgive you for thinking i was girl...but next time think about  
it...if a person laughs and enjoys torturing people and doesn't fawn over Link  
or something it's probably a guy...anyway since i can't review the same  
chapther again here's what i want you to put in the next chapther**_

Dares for Link:  
1. take out that giant spiked ball thing that you use to crush ice and all  
and swing it and try to hit Navi for an hour here's a super energy potion  
2. kill Ronald McDonald (the clown deserves to die)  
3. (note...you enjoyed the ROOM with Zelda didn't you...)

Dares for Zelda:  
1...sorry about having to be pregnant with Link's child...even though it was  
fake (coughs you enjoyed it didn't you coughs)  
2. punch Ilia in the mouth and knock out some teeth (i don't care if she's  
still wounded from earlier just do it)

Dares for Midna:  
1. sorry about the Jamaica thing...i was on evil candy holds up jar full of  
evil candy  
2. Kill Zant before he can do anything to Link you or Zelda  
3. Give an atomic wedgie to Ganadork  
4. chuckles evily blow up stone henge...in front of stone henge geeks and  
nerds you can kill them if they attack you

Dares for Ilia:  
1. Go jump in a lake  
2. Stay there as i dump piranhas and sharks in there dumps said creatures in  
3. Scream  
4. Remain calm  
5. wait for the nuclear missle to impact your spot in 2 seconds (there is a  
safe zone for the others just not Ilia)  
6...you're a dumb blonde (no offense to blonde people seeing as there are  
smart blondes)  
7. take it like a man mutters: because you are one

Dares for Twilight:  


_**  
1. invade Canada with me! (no offense to Canadians i just always wanted to  
dare someone tohat i just always wanted Canada for myself)  
2. Make out with some guy who's on the crew (not Link) i don't care if it's a  
bug or the toilet  
3. kick Ganadork right where it hurts (normally i wouldn't even consider this  
seeing as i'm also a guy but still i hate ganadork)**_

Link: heheh yessssssssss (tries to hit Navi)

Navi: Hey ow! OW OW OW OWO WOW!!

Link: (I hour later) Ahhh….i enjoyed that

Navi: (in a body cast)

Link: I get to kill a clown?! SWEET!

Zelda: YAY!

Link: (Goes to McDonalds 5 min later comes back) He umm…. How should a put it? Got a lawyer

Twilight: What's a-

Shadow: WILL YOU BE QUIET!!

Zelda: You want me to punch Ilia? Ok (turns around and punches Ilia)

Midna: Umm… Zelda?

Zelda: Yeah?

Navi: That wasn't Ilia

Zelda: it wasn't?

Keroanne1: Nope look

Twilight: (on the floor bleeding)

Link: Try changing your name and moving to Mexico……it worked for me

Zelda: She had amnesia she won't get mad

Twilight: (gets up and stares at Zelda) That wasn't very nice lady

Keroanne1 and Shadow: (dump Ilia into a lake)

Ilia: IT'S FREEZING IN HERE!!

Keroanne1 and Shadow: (dump said creatures)

Ilia: (screams at the top of her lungs)

Zelda: REMAIN CALM!!

Ilia: WHY??

Zelda: It says so in the review

Midna: Nuclear missile coming in 5 4 3 2 1 (explosion)

Ilia: (buried under sushi)

Navi: Since when do nuclear missiles have sushi?

Twilight: (eating sushi

) Yum…….

Link: Your turn Twilight (gives her gun) go invade Canada

Kasier: Hi!

Twilight: Who are you?

Kaisier: I'm only in here for one chapter LET'S GO INVADE CANADA!!

Twilight: YAYA!! (runs into Canada) DIE EVIL MOOSES!!

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**2 hour later**

Twilight: That was fun! Thank you! Now what?

Navi: Make out with some guy in the studio (cute boy walks in)

Twilight: THAT WILL WORK!! Hey you get over here! (you know what happens next)

Shadow: Wow never seen her like this

Ilia: Well she does have amnesia

Twilight: CYA CUTIE!! Now what?

Midna: Kick Ganondorf where it hurts

Twilight: Ok (walks up to some random person) HI! (kicks them in the nuts)

Everyone; (sighs)

Zelda: That's not Ganondorf

Twilight: It's not?

Keroanne1: She has amnesia what can we do?

Twilight: Hey what does this button do? (presses a button and lasers go off)

Everyone: FOR THE SAKE OF OUR HUMANITY GET HER MEMORY BACK PEOPLE!!

Midna: And now for the comments!

_**Keroanne1:**_ _**WOOT! I love my guns and I had a flamethrower and this is an awesome fanfiction. BWAHAHAHA! I LOVE TORTURRING!**_

_**Hakusgirl Katsuko: lol good chapter. (like you've ever posted a bad one LOL) though it kinda hurts to laugh... anyway good job**_

_**FallenRose19:**_ _**YOU ARE THE FUNNIEST MOST RANDOM PERSON EVA!! XD Watch out, I'ma gonna send you some questions...sinister laugh**_

Twilight: Hey what does this do? (presses a button and Lizard demons come out)

Everyone: GET HER MEMORY BACK!!


	7. Chapter 7

Shadow: Hello people

Shadow: Hello people!

Keroanne1: And other people!

Twilight: (silent)

Shadow: psst…… It's your line!

Twilight: What?

Link: Twilight still has amnesia and a FEW people tried to get her memory back

Midna: While some other wanted to torture us more

Ilia: And what better way to avoid this by doing it?

Zelda: That doesn't make sense

Navi: OMG can we PLEASE get on with it??

Twilight: WAIT!! What does this button do?

Everyone: DON'T PRESS THAT BUTTON!!

Twilight: (presses button anyway)

Speaker: This place will now self destruct

Everyone:RRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!

(camera shuts off)

(camera comes back on again)

Twilight: (strapped to a pole)

Keroanne1: DON'T LET HER NEAR BUTTONS!!

Ilia: Ok! Let's read the reviews already!

Zelda: This one is from _**Sargeras111 **_and he is asking

_**Hello it's me again! The fiery lord has returned Mua HA HA HA! Let's begin. (Twilight if you haven't seen Star wars skip the first dare.) This dare is for Link oh it's mean. Dress up in Leia's golden bikini and play winnie the pooh on violine! Now to the questions. Ganondorf: Do you have curlers in your hair? It's disgusting. Zant: What's your favourite flavor of ice-cream?  
That's everthing folks. I wish i could join you but i know you're full.**_

Twilight: Can I be untied people? This looks like fun!

Navi: Ahh let her out

Shadow: (unties Twilight) DO NOT TOUCH ANY BUTTONS

Twilight: Ok ok sheesh

Midna: (smiles evily)

Link: Midna why are you looking at me like that?

Midna: (takes out Leia's golden bikini)

Ilia: Where did you get that?

Midna: (flashes back)

_Leia: (Sitting in her bathtub sleeping)_

_Midna: (walks in) Hey this isn't the studio_

_Leia: (starts snoring) _

_Midna: AAHH!! THE DEVIL CAME TO KILL ME!! (stares at Leia bikini) Oh well.. (takes bikini)_

Zelda: ooooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyy

Link: (puts on bikini) Ok now what?

Keroanne1: Here you go! (gives him violin and takes out plasma cannon) Now start playing

Twilight: (Stares at the cannon) Can I try that?

Keroanne1: Uhhh……sure (hands her the cannon)

Ilia: I don't think that was a good idea

Keroanne1: Why?

Twilight: (fires cannon at Link and misses)

Midna: (dodges missle) GET THE GUN AWAY FROM HER!!

Link: (almost gets shot) CURSE YOU ANASTASIA!!

Everyone: (stares at Link)

Navi: (dodges flying missle) YOU IDIOT IT'S AMNESIA!!

Zelda: (takes the cannon away easily)

Shadow: How did you do that?

Twilight: (getting distracted by a piece of steak Zelda's holding)

Shadow: Ohhhhhhhhhh………..

Midna: (holds out Twilight cellphone)

Ilia: Hey can I try that? (Text message Ganondorf)

Ganondorf: WHO SAID I SLEPT WITH ZELDA??

Zelda: (passes out)

Link: Ilia? What did you text message him?

Ilia: (hands him phone)

Link: OMG!! ILIA!!

Ilia: What!? What did I do!?

Link: You spelled Zelda's name wrong! There is no 7 in her name!

Keroane1: (sigh) Do you wear curlers to bed?

Ganondorf: I umm…

Twilight: (holds out a box of curlers) HAHAH!! LOOK WHAT I FOUND!! CAN I KEEP IT??

Midna: Eww Twilight put that back whose is that anyway?

Twilight: (looks at the box) "Property of Ganondorf if lost please give it to me)

Ganondorf: (stares blankly)

Shadow: I HATE GAY MEN!!

Navi: I want to try that (text message Zant)

Zant: Ice cream, ice cream. We all scream for ice cream!

Ilia: QUICK! What's your favorite flavor ice cream??

Zant: Umm umm…. I'M NOT GOOD UNDER PRESSURE!!

Twilight: (eating chocolate ice cream)

Zant: MINE!! (tackles Twilight)

And they continue to fight over the ice cream…………….

Zelda: OOKKKKKAAAYYYYY

Ilia: This next review is from _**Deathlordalmighty **_and he is asking

_**OMG that was freakin hilarious. I had no Idea. Since people get to put dares and questions I will to.  
LINK:  
1. How come you always wear the same gay outfit every freakin game?  
2. Link it is freakin obvious that you and llia like eachother so why aren't you together?  
LINK DARE:  
1. I dare you to be handcuffed to michael jackson in nothing but your underwear and micheal jackson can ask you to do anything he wants (excluding anything sexual) for one show.  
GANADORF  
1. How did you get your triforce?  
2. Do you like zelda or something because in every game you kidnap her? Why not go for some other chicks first?  
GANADORF DARE  
1. i DARE you to dress up in a frilly pink flower dress and be that bug girl buddie for a day. You have to do whatever she says.  
LLIA ZELDA AND HUMAN MIDNA.  
1. Zelda why do you always get captured?  
2. Midna what do you like Link better as a wolf or human?  
3. Llia what did it feel like to have no memory?  
Dare  
I dare you three to put on nothing buT your underwear and wash epona. AND THEN HAVE A MUD WRESTILING MATCH. HE HE HE.  
POSTMAN  
1. WHAT IS UP WITH YOUR FACE?!  
NAVI DARE  
i DARE YOU to try to calm down catch ganadorfs monster pet (it is on the drug "Speed") in the snowy mountains with you wearing summer clothes and you have the iron boots on. Oh and the beast will eat you if you bother it.  
That is all I can come up with for now. Please take these into consideration. This is a very funny fic. Later  
-DLA**_

Link: MY OUTFIT ISN'T GAY!!

Midna: Dude you wear tights

Twilight: HAHAH!! I WIN THE ICE CREAM!! (devours bottle) Back to business LINK ISNT GAY!! HE'S HOT!! TOO BAD HE'S TAKEN!!

Everyone: WWWWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTT??

Twilight: What? What did I say?

Link: (coughs uncomfortable)

Zelda: Link and Ilia aren't together in this fic because if they were Twilight would get flaming reviews

Twilight: Hey princess person is this what you mean by flaming reviews? (lights a review on fire)

Navi: STOP DROP AND ROLL!!

Keroanne1: (bring the fire extinguisher)

Shadow: Well that was pleasant NOW GIVE ME THE PHONE!! (takes Twilight's phone and text messages Michael Jackson)

M.J: Sweet I get a guy this time!?

Link: (runs away)

Midna: Ahh let him go. Will catch him on footage in 5 4 3 2 1…..(turns on camera)

_Link: GO AWAY!! I'M TAKEN!!_

_M.J: Really? Well (sigh) fine but call me!_

_Link: (gags)_

Ilia: EW EW EW!! READ THE NEXT DARE!!

Ganondorf: Hello

Zelda: Your STILL here??

Ganondarf: I got my triforce by……

Link: (listens closely)

Ganondorf: Umm……never mind

Keroanne1: (thinks) EEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWW!!

Twilight: (throws him out) Hehe that was fun!!

Zelda: GANONDORF DOES NOT LIKE ME HE JUST KIDNAPS NE TO SEE LINK

Link: WHAT??

Ganondorf: (heard outside of the studio) WHEN DID I START WEARING THIS DRESS??

Twilight: hehe……

Midna: Hmm……..I like Link as a wolf because whenever I want to see the sky I don't see up his tunic as well

Everyone except Link: (snickering)

Ilia: What was it like having no memory? The same way Twilight is feeling right now

Twilight: (re-reads the review) Midna, turn into your human form and the rest of you strip down to you underwear and ONLY your underwear no bra

The 3 girls; WHAT??

Link: (giggling)

Keroanne1: YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO LOOK!

Link: (making puppy dog eyes) Ohh….fine

3 girls: (start washing Epona in their tighty whites)

Link: (staring and drooling)

Midna: (throws a rock at him) COVER YOUR EYES!!

Shadow: Ok your done you can come out now

Navi: HERE BEASTY BEASTY BEASTY!!

Ilia: What are you doing?

Navi: calling the beast HERE- (get's flattened by the beast)

Twilight: Well that was fun. Hehe glowing fairy got squashed

Midna: (sigh) This next review is from _**keybladeboy **_and he is asking

_**Woo, you answered my review! But my offer of more knowledge of the Zelda games still stands. NEW DARES AND STUFF!! new and improved evil laugh**_

Link: I dare you to club Twilight with your Ball and Chain until she regains her memory.

Zelda: I dare you and Link to switch roles for a new adventure.

Ilia: I dare you to kill a crippled horse! presents a crippled horse Also, I dare you to ride a donkey for the rest of the chapter. presents a donkey

Midna: I dare you to...JOIN ZELDA AND ILIA IN WASHING EPONA! I'm milking that dare for everything it's worth. Also, you have to do it in your human form. Anybody that wants to hit Link for watching can.

steals a crapload of sushi M...Anybody have any wasabi or soy sauce?

Link: (takes out ball and chain) Hey Twilight come here! I have sttteeeaaakkkkkkk

Twilight: STEAK?? WHERE!!

Link: (starts clubbing Twilight) DID YOU GET YOUR MEMORY NOW? No? HOW ABOUT NOW!!(continues to club Twilight)

Twilight: GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME!! (takes the ball and chain and hits Link)

Link: (cough) Did you get your memory back?

Zelda: Only one way to find out LOOK TWILIGHT RIANIX!!

Twilight: Whose Rianix?

Navi: Nope still didn't work and she beat the living daylights out of Link so that's over

Keroanne1: COOL! If they switched roles the new game would be called "The Legend of Link Zelda's awakening"

Ilia: I have to what!?

Shadow: (takes crippled horse from keybladeboy) Thanks!

Keybladeboy: Where am I?

Midna: He's on to us GET HIM!!

Keybladeboy: What!? (gets thrown out(no offense) What just happened?

Zelda: (gives Ilia a gun)

Twilight: (blind folds horse and gives it a cigarette)

Everyone: (stares at Twilight)

Twilight: What? They do it in Tom and Jerry.

Ilia: (points gun at crippled horse and fires)

Navi: You missed

Ilia: Really? Who did I shoot then? (they hear a scream outside the studio)

Zelda: Let's just take that gun away shall we?

Everyone: Agreed

Midna: Why do you perverted guys like watching us girls wash a horse in our underclothes??

Link: (whispers) Because you look hot

All the girls even Keroanne1 and Shadow (Not Twilight lol): (beats the crap out of Link)

Midna: Now that that's done (goes and washes Epona)

Link: (behind a fence) AW COME ON! Cant I see?

All girls: NO!

Link: (makes a peephole) Hehehe

Everyone: (gangs up on Link)

Navi: Well that was fun

Zelda: What up with the ending?

Twilight: (amazingly pulls out sauce from nowhere) Here you go!

Keybladeboy: Thanks! (steals more sushi) Umm….BYE!!

Keroanne1: Ok that was awkward

Midna: This next review is from _**toastwolf117 **_and he/she is asking

_**Hey guys, I love your story and I have questions and dares for everyone!**_

Link:  
Questions:Is it cool to be a wolf? Did you wet yourself when Midna used those shadow peices to destroy the force feild on the castle?  
Dares:Play Sonic the hedgehog(2006) For 2 hours(twilight if you dont know what it is, It is the worst sonic game ever with terrible controls, long loading screens, and increadbly frustrating stages.)  
Midna:  
Questions:How is being fused with the shadow peices?  
Dares:Tell us your deepest darkest secret.  
Zelda:  
Questions:What was it like being the Twilight Princess?  
Dares:Eat Navi!  
Lila:  
Questions:Did you actully have amneisa or were you pretending?  
Dares:Have Link badly injure you with the Master Sword.

Oh, and 1 last thing Talo and Malo are guys.(No Really!)

Link: Was it cool being a wolf? HECK YEAH!!

Midna: Of course he wet himself! He tried lying and said it was lemonade

Link: I have to play a video game? SWEET!

Shadow: Here you go Link (hands him stuff that I don't feel like writing about)

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**2 hours later**

Link: Jump! I SAID JUMP!! No no no no! NOOOOOOOO!! (attacks T.V) THIS IS TAKING FOR EVER!!

Everyone: (stares blankly at Link)

Navi: uuuuummmmmmm………….

Zelda: Link, I say this because I care. YOU'RE PATHETIC

Midna: Being fused together with the Shadow pieces made me feel sorry for the jellyfish

Ilia: What? Why?

Midna: Because I felt gooey and couldn't stand up straight. (no spine lol)

Twilight: Tell me your deepest secret Midna.

Midna: Why out of all people on earth would I tell you?

Twilight: Because Keroanne1 and Shadow said if I act evil I can have steak!

Keroanne1 and Shadow: (slap their foreheads) WHEN WILL SHE REMEMBER??

Midna: My deepest secret is that I always think monkeys are coming to get me…………..

Everyone even Twilight: (laughing their heads off)

Midna: (sighs)

Zelda: I was the Twilight Princess?

Midna: ARE YOU THAT STUPID?? THAT'S WHY I CALLED YOU THAT IN THE BEGINNING OF THE GAME!!

Twilight: (putting soy sauce on Navi) Here you go Zelda!

Zelda: What is this?

Navi: (whispering) don't eat under the lettuce………………

Zelda: (also whispering) ok…..

Link: Zelda why are you talking to your food?

Zelda: Umm…. Well because I have to get to know it before we become together

Ilia: Zelda you're eating the sandwich not marrying it.

Zelda: (eats her sandwich but not the lettuce)

Shadow: You don't like lettuce?

Zelda: No not really (puts lettuce aside)

Navi: (comes out of the bathroom)

Everyone: NAVI??

Navi: AHH! WHAT?!

Keroanne1: If that's Navi then who is………………(takes off lettuce to reveal Tingle)

Zelda: (throws up)

Shadow: Don't worry I got it. (take Rianix's whistle out and Tingle in a separate room) (blows whistle)

Tingle: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhh……………………

Shadow: And that's that

Link: If Ilia didn't really have amnesia how come she didn't fawn over Epona as much as when she DID NOT have amnesia?

Midna: That reminds me some of these reviews aren't helping Twilight

Twilight: (staring at a blinking light) hehehe blink…blink…..blink….blink…..

Ilia: Umm…………?

Link: Heheh and now for the last part….(takes out master sword and throws it at Ilia)

Ilia: You missed

Navi: What is with you people and the bad aiming?

Link: Who did I hit then?

Twilight: (2 inches under Master Sword) It's a good thing he's taller than me

Keroanne1: Thank you toastwolf117!

Zelda: Are next review is from _**Nakori Elvenborn **_and she is asking

_**runs in with a frying pan and hits Twilight Sonic on the head Remeber Dang it! ...fryingpans are how i get memories back so im not sure if it will work or not sweatdrop but any way hop T.S wont be mad at me for head trama**_

Zelda I dare you to turn into sheik and kiss Ganondorf. ) ( can't you tell i don't like zelda??)

Nakori Elvenborn: (comes out of nowhere with a frying pan and hit's Twilight on the head) Did it work!?

Twilight: (on the floor having a concussion)

Zelda: One way to find out. LOOK TWILIGHT EVIL THINGS!!

Twilight: (spits out a tooth) Yeah whatever I'm sure that's nice

Midna: Nope

Nakori Elvenborn: DANG IT!

Keroanne1: You can stay for you review

Nakori: Really? Sweet!

Shadow: (test messaging Ganondorf) Ok here should be here right about………now (door knocks)

Ganondorf: Ok I'm here! And I'm ready to kiss my hottie!

Nakori: (evil laugh)

Kerianne1: (points pistol at Zelda) Turn into Sheik.

Zelda: BUT I'M NOT GAY!!

Navi: Ganondorf isn't a girl

Zelda: HE WEARS CURLERS TO BED!!

Ganondorf: (coughs)

Zelda: Fine I'll do it (turns into Sheik)

Ganondorf: I knew you want me

Everyone: (runs into a different corner and barfs)

Zelda: There I did it!

Nakori: MWAHAH!! Got the picture! (runs away)

Ilia: ooooookkkkkkkkkkkkaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy

Link: This next review is from _**Kaiser Spartan **_and he is asking

_**heh heh pure gold anyway...**_

walks in with moose antlers on my head  
hits twilight on the head with an anvil a mallet and a washing machine before wiping her memory of it and cramming a bottle of i-remeber-who-i-am-now-and-my-amnesia-is-gone down her mouth

anyway

Dares/Favors for Link

1. i go back in time to where Link had to kiss Zant and swaps Link out and shoves Ganadork in there with Zant  
2. why didn't you kill ronald mcdonald is crying right now i don't gave a frack about lawyers takes out shotgun and sword i will kill all lawyers and ronald mcdonald my self then! leaves and comes back in 5 hours later covered in blood and fries  
3. heh heh make out with Midna (she has to turn into her normal form) and Zelda for 5 hours straight while they wear only a bikini and no they can't harm you during before or after the dare  
4. Use Navi as a baseball and the Master Sword as a bat

Dares for Zelda:  
1. Make Ilia fall into a coma!  
2(to inappropriate so I cut it out) 

_**3. Throw Ilia's coma body into a volcano!**_

Dares for Ilia:  
1...do i need to say anything just lie down and accept your fate

Dares for Midna:  
1. shoot Navi tosses her two SMGs (aka semi-automatic machine guns) no you can't shoot anyone else but Navi...and Ganadork...and Zant  
2. Kill the fangirls outside that guy who upgrades Link's quiver's tent

Dares for Navi:  
1. don't say anything and accept your fate

Dares for Twilight:  
1. That was fun invading Canada  
2. Help me invade Jamaica now!  
3. Help me kill off Zant and Ganadork!

Twilight: (on the floor bleeding)

Midna: Quick hide her body

Shadow: Twilight do you remember now?

Twilight: (wakes up) I think so

Everyone: HURRAY!!

Twilight: Wait where am I?

Everyone: (falls down anime style)

Midna and Zelda: (blushes) Umm…..we

Twilight: You have to change into a bikini and make out with Link

Keroanne1: I think she remembers a little bit

Twilight: (shoves Zelda and human Midna in another room with Link)

3 of them: (in the room giggling)

Navi: INAPPROPIATE!! SHEILD YOUR EYES!!

3 of them: (come out of the room satisfied)

Twilight: eeeeewwwwwww…………(watches a fly)

Shadow: Here you go Link. (hands him Master Sword and Navi) Have fun

Link: (runs to the baseball field)

Fangirl: (heard from the field) IT'S LINK! GET HIS SHIRT!!

Link: (runs back into the studio) Well at least I had some fun

Zelda: (chuckles evily and takes out an anchor) HI ILIA!! (hits Ilia on the head making her fall into a coma)

Midna: Good now throw her in a volcano

Zelda: (smiles) Instead of a volcano (leaves Ilia in a bar with drunken men)

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**20 minuets later**

Ilia: (runs back into the studio) I ALMOST GOT RAPED BECAUSE OF YOU!!

Zelda: Keyword ALMOST

Midna: (takes the guns) Hey Navi get over here!! (starts shooting)

Navi: AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!! (runs away) 2 hours later

Navi: (In a body cast)

Midna: And now for those other girls (goes to castle town) Hi!

Fangirl1: Hi!

Midna: Your going to die

Fangirl2: What? (gets killed)

Midna: that was fun!!

Kaiser: (walks in) Let's go to Jamaica!!

Twilight: I get to invade another country!? YES!!

Kasier: CHARGE!! (3 hours later)

Twilight: (walks in covered in blood)

Zelda: So umm……how did it go?

Twilight: hehe

Ilia: I'll take that as good

Twilight: (takes out pistol and shoots Ganondorf and Zant between the eyes)

Midna: Ooooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

Keroanne1: This next review is from ME!!

_**It is time for my dares! I'm just insane that way. Zelda, I dare you hit  
Link for the rest of the fanfiction. Um... er... Ilia! Lemme think of  
something for her real quick! Start singing It's A Small World in a really  
loud and annoying voice. Link... I dare you to cut off your own hand with a  
chainsaw! (Keroanne1 are you ok?)  
Uh, that's it.**_

Zelda: YAY!! (takes the Ball and Chain from Link and starts hitting him)

Link: HEY OW QUIT IT!!

Ilia: iiiiitttttttt'sssssss a ssssssmmmmmmmmmmaaaaaalllllllllllll wwwwwwoooooorrrrrlllllllllddddd aaaaaaaaaffffffffftttttttteeeeeeerrrrrr aaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllll

Keroanne1:AHH!! MAKE IT STOP!! OH WHY DID I REVIEW THAT!?

Link: (takes out a chainsaw and cuts off a FAKE hand)

Keroanne1: Hey I'm not stupid you know

Link: Are you sure?

Keroanne1: GET OVER HERE!! (takes out chainsaw) IF YOUR NOT CUTTING YOUR HAND OFF I AM!! (chases Link)

Link: HELP ME FANGIRLS!!

Shadow: Our next review is from _**Hakusgirl Hatsuko **_

_**DARE LINK TO SING "Bad Boy" by Cascada!! that's all i got.. it's late. good chapter as per usual. :)**_

Link: You really like watching me sing don't you? Well I do have an amazing voice

Navi: (cough) No he doesn't (cough)

Link: (ahem) Remember the feelings, remember the day. My stone heart was breaking My love ran away.

Twilight: (twitching) MAKE IT STOP!! (throws a tomato and an old shoe)

Link: Ok ok fine

Midna: This last review is from _**The Deimon Commander from Hell **_and he is asking

_**KEKEKEKE!  
Okay, here's a dare for the entire crew.  
Everyone, play a game of poker. The people who lose the game will get blackmailed to death! -Holds up Devil's Handbook- Oh, and they're going to get shot too. -Pulls out four chainguns-  
Bandgeek99: o0 Where do you keep all that stuff?  
TDCFH: I really have no idea...Anyways, the winner of the game DOESN'T get blackmailed and shot!**_

Everyone: WHAT!?

Twilight: What!? What's going on!?

Shadow: (shoves Twilight in a nearby closet)

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2 hours later

Midna: OMG this is taking forever

Navi: Well nobody wants to get shot

Zelda: Or blackmailed

Link: Don't we already get that here?

Everyone: (thinks and stares at the hosts)

3 hosts: What?

Everyone: (sigh)

Twilight: can I still keep the gun?

Everyone: NO!!

**ANNOUCEMENT Hi everyone it's me Twilight. I have a Youtube account and I would like those of you who have (and don't have) accounts to watch a video on Youtube I made. My name is DemonTwilightWolf on Youtube so just search my name. The video I want you to watch is (Twilight Princess Requiem of a Dream (Orchastrated Version)" **

**Those of you who have accounts there please leave a comment thanks. And those who don't have an account. Just watch the video. HOPE YOU ENJOY BYE!!**


	8. Chapter 8

Twilight: (crying)

Keroanne1: Twilight didn't update the story for so long because she was grounded off the computer

Twilight: I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THOSE PEOPLE!!

Shadow: Twilight those were your parents

Link: Oh this is awkward

Ilia: Shall we go on?

Zelda: This review is from………..

Midna: What?

Navi: Did the person forget to sign his name?

Zelda: Uhh…..

Link: What is it Zelda?

Zelda: ………………

Keroanne1: SHE'S UNDER THE INFLUENCE!! GET HER!!

Zelda: What? (gets hit by a frying pan)

Shadow: I don't think that was the problem

Twilight: What was the problem then?

Zelda: I cant read this word it's smudged

Ilia: Give me that. It's from………….uh….roastwolf?

Twilight: WHAT KIND OF SICK PERSON WOULD ROAST A WOLF!?

Navi: You idiot it's from _**toastwolf117 **_and he/she is asking

_**Me: Thanks for using my dares, and now time for more dares  
Everyone: NO!  
Me: And getting twilights memory back  
Everyone: YAY!  
Link: wait... GASP! That means she'll hurt me more. NO!  
Me: oh, and I got a letter for you from a character from sonic the hedgehog series.. Its short, looks like gibberish, and written in blood, but we will get to that after the dares.**_

Link...  


_**1. Have midna hit you in the pants with your ball and chain.  
2. Go on a secret agent mission with me and Shadow the hedgehog.  
3. Befreind a bug named pablo  
4. Be buried alive.  
5. Watch Dora the explorer**_

Midna...  
1. posses the cast of the fanfic  
2. befreind a twili named pablo

Zelda...  
1. Have whoever sent the letter rule hyrule for a day  
2. Befriend a hylan named pablo

Lila...  
1. Befreind a horse named pablo

Twilight...  
1. Put sonic on the fanfic

Navi...  
1. Do I need to say anything.

Me: And now for the letter

open

to twilight

Shlumpy

From tails doll

Me: Wait a minute, who wrote that letter?

(Tails Doll comes out of the letter and posseses twilight)  


_**Tails Doll: She should remember now.  
(Tails Doll then leaves.)**_

Link: It's the Tails Doll!! RUN!!

Everyone: (goes insane)

Tails Doll: MWAHAHAHAH!! AAHAH!! HAHA (cough) AHAHAH!!

Keroanne1: (pulls out chainsaw) DIE YOU BALL OF FUR!!

Tails Doll: NOOO!! (get torn to pieces)

Twilight: (dizzy)

Shadow: Do you remember now?

Twilight: All I remember is I'm obsessed with animals, fantasy, dragons and wolves

Link: It: helped a little bit

Ilia: This review is weird

Keroanne1: Here ya go Midna (hands her ball and chain)

Midna: (evil grin) Ready Link?

Link: Let me just- (gets hit)

Midna: Was that too early?

Zelda: (thinking) Why am I even here?

Ilia: (also thinking) I don't know Zelda

Zelda: (thinking) AHH!! Ilia!? How did you get here!?

Ilia: (thinking) I just don't know

Everyone: (staring at the two zoning out) Are you done?

Link: (dressed up as a spy)

Navi: Uhhhh……………?

Link: I have to go on a secret mission with tostwolf117 and Shadow the hedgehog!

Shadow: HEY! My name is Shadow but that doesn't mean I'm a hedgehog!

Midna: He wasn't talking about you

Link: And now for the secret mission!

Twilight: Ooh look a camera (evil smile) Heheh I'm going to follow him

_ShadowH: I am Shadow the Hedgehog. I'm the world's ultimate life form._

_Toastwolf117: And I'm the one that gave you the dare!_

_Link: So what the secret mission?_

_ShadowH: Steal a piece of cheese_

_Link: (falls anime style) What? From who?_

_Toastwolf117: The bug I told you to befriend, Pablo_

_Link: (sweatdrops) OK fine (approaches Pablo) Hey Pablo! Can I have some cheese? (attempts to take cheese)_

_Pablo: (roars) MY CHEESE!! (jumps into Link's pants)_

_Link: Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh HOLY COW! GET OUT OF THERE!! OW!! (wimpers) He bit me in a bad place_

_Toastwolf117: So where's Sonic?_

_ShaodwH: Nothing you can prove_

Navi: Wow that was sad

Keroanne1: Don't forget pathetic

Ilia: (brings a shovel)

Zelda: ? Ilia what's that for?

Ilia: To bury Link alive

Twilight: (playing in a sandbox) I made a circle!

Midna: (evil smile) Hey Link are you tired from all these dares?

Link: You think?

Shadow: Why don't you play with Twilight on the sandbox?

Link: Really? Yes! (jump into sandbox) Look I made a circle!

Twilight: (mumbling) Mine was better

Keroanne1: (digging a hole)

Link: What are you going to make?

Navi: A human sculpture

Link: Of who?

Midna: OF YOU! (shoves him into hole)

Ilia: QUICK BURY HIM!!

Twilight: (starts pouring sand inside)

Shadow: Well that's that

Everyone: (crying) WHAT HAVE WE DONE!?

Keroanne1: We crushed him into atoms…….

Link: (eating a banana) Hi guys

Everyone: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!! HE CAME BACK FROM THE DEAD!!

Twilight: It's a corpse! (takes a rusty anchor from out of thin air) (hit's Link) DIE ZOMBIE!!

Shadow: Link? Are you alright? (takes a stick and pokes him)

Link: Ungh where am I?

Zelda: Great now he has amnesia too!

Link: No I still remember I just lost a few IQ points is all

Twilight: Really? Whatever.

Navi: (amazingly drags a T.V outside) (flips the switch) Here ya go Link. Watch Dora

Link: But I don't wanna!!

Keroanne1: (takes out a plasma rifle) You.will.watch.it

Link: (sits and watches Dora) (shudders) So……gay

Midna: (reads review) MWhahah!! I get to posses the cast! (does a little thingie spell whatever)

Twilight: (has an oxygen mask on)

Midna: Ummm…..any reason your wearing that?

Twilight: (points up)

Everyone: (looks up) OMG!!

Dozens of Pigs: (in awkward position)

Navi: EVERY ONE HOLD YOUR NOSE!!

Random Pig: LET HER RIP!! (noise)

Everyone: (faints)

Twilight: (laughing through the oxygen mask)

Ilia: (pulls the oxygen mask off)

Twilight: AHAH!! EWWW!! (coughs) MY EYES ARE WATERING!!

Pigs: (fly away)

Link: Since when can pigs fly?

Keroanne1: In Twilights little imagination.

Shadow: Twilight said this was too long so she is going to cut some of this out.

Zelda: Sorry but we have to start with the next review

Midna: This next one is from _**Michieru Berujironu**_

_**What can I say, I'm a sucker for a good question and dares.**_

Link: Why do you wear a skirt? Yes I know it's a tunic, but it looks too much like a skirt.

Midna: You are badass! You have got to be the coolest Zelda character ever! I swear they better make another game with you in it or I'll kill Miyamoto .

I dare Zelda to go into the closet with Ganondorf for three hours without any heroes intervening points at Link That means you.

Navi: hahahah Link wears a skirt

Link: It's not a skirt! It's the royal tunic only the hero is supposed to wear!

Ilia: (whispering) It still looks like a skirt

Midna: OOoohh I got a fan, Thanks!

Zelda: A fan? Where?! It's so hot in here!

Everyone: (sweatdrops) Not that fan Zelda

Shadow: (text message)

Keroanne1: OK that's starting to get a little bit annoying.

Ganondorf: (walks in a towel) WHAT!?

Twilight: MY EYES!! MY PURE VIRGIN EYES!! (throws them in a closet)

Zelda: AAAAAAHHHHHH!! HIS TOWEL FELL OFF!!

Ilia: Poor Zelda

Navi: Link don't you have any, I don't know, urges to save Zelda?

Link: (playing Twilight Princess) No I'm saving her right now in the game

Everyone: (falls anime style)

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**1 HOUR LATER**

Zelda: (comes out of the closet twitching)

Twilight: Zelda? (pokes her)

Navi: Does anyone have any smelling salts?

Link: I have an old gym sock in my locker

Zelda: (wakes up) I'm good

Keroanne1: This next review is from _**Sky Lord 35 **_and he/she is asking

_**This is very funny and I,am new here. Well with that aside time for some dares (Smiles Evilly.)Midna I dare you to fight Rianx! Yeah that Rianx! Twilight's pet dragon! But I will allow Midna to use (but it,s still not going to make a differance.)Link as A human sheild. Zelda I dare you to 1. cut Navi's wing,s off. (Navi you are so anoying.) 2.Fire A light arrow at Ilia's Arm. Ilia I dare you to Go punch Zelda in the face. Twilight I dare you to ride and help (In any way.) Rianx while he or she,s (I don,t know if It,s a he or a she.) Fighting Midna. (Who knows rideing Rianx might get Twilight,s memory back??) See yeah! Sky Lord 35.**_

Midna: I HAVE TO WHAT!?

Everyone: HERE RIANIX!! (blows whistle)

Rianix: (crashes in from the ceiling)

Ilia: Let the battle begin!

Twilight: (gets on Rianix's back) Wow this feels so familiar. Hey I remember you! Your Rianix My dragon!

Navi: Do you remember anything else?

Twilight: No not really

Navi: (sweatdrops)

Midna: (pulls Link In front of her) BE MY SHEILD!!

Link: What?

Rianix: (breaths fire on Link and Midna)

Midna: YOU ARE THE WORST SHIELD EVER!!

Twilight: (laughing)

Zelda: (Pulls out tweezers) Come here Navi…….

Navi: What? AAHHHHHHHH!!(wings get torn off)

Zelda: Ahhh that soothed me so. And now for this (fires a light arrow at Ilia)

Ilia: AH! (ducks) Haha you missed! (gets hit by another light arrow) Hey! (puches Zelda)

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_**3 HOURS LATER**_

Shadow: Well now that your done fighting and everyone is back from the emergency room lets to the next review.

Keroanne1: We weren't even evolved in the fight (sniff)

Link: This next review is from _**keybladeboy **_and he is asking

_**Hey, saw the video, left a comment under the same name. And now...**_

Twilight- I hate Ilia and feel that she should die and that Link should hook up with RUTO. How does that make you feel? -not really, I'm just trying to jog her memory-

_**Link- I DARE YOU TO HOOK UP WITH RUTO! -I feel like being evil today-**_

Ilia: YOU SHOT ME, YOU DUMB ! I CHALLENGE YOU TO A DUEL! -grabs two duelist's pistols-

Twilight: (sniff) DIE YOU EVIL SON OF A

Midna: Twilight! Where did you learn that word!?

Shadow: (text messaging Ruto)

Link: OH no! Not that deranged Zora again!!

Ruto: LINNNNKKKK!! I LOVE YOU!! MARRY ME!!

Ilia: Challenge you? (takes a shotgun and shoots you off guard) Now I must bury his body

Keroanne1: Well that was weird. This next review is from _**choasinssbb **_and he/she is asking

_**Lets see what I can do...**_

Comes and brings sonic the hedgehog in a cage.

Link:Do a musical number with sonic chosen by Shadowpun intended, you will understand if you know the sonic characters

Zelda: defuse a time bomb while being annoyed by navi.

Navi:carry the cage sonic was in and run across hyrule.

Twilight: Hey look its Sonic! (waves hand)

Sonic: (waves back)

Midna: How do they know each other?

Zelda: It takes one idiot to know another

Link: I have to what?

Shadow and ShadowH: I'll do it! What? No you wont!

Shadow: Fine how about we both decide?

ShadowH: Caramelldansen!!

Everyone: (stares at ShadowH)

Sonic: Dude I thought you were the tough type

Link: (Starts doing the caramell dance)

Ilia: Aww! That's kind of cute!!

Navi: And creepy. Link you look gay

Link: (crying) I know

Keroanne1: OMG GUYS!!TWILIGHT JUST PLANTED A BOMB!!

Everyone: WHAT!? TWILGHT YOU IDIOT!!

Twilight: I wanted to see what would happen!!

Zelda: I'LL DO IT!!

Midna: Take Navi with you! She might be able to help!!

Zelda: (trying to defuse the bomb)

Navi: redgoeswithblueandyourdoingitwrongyouhavetodowhatisayZELDALOOKLISTNHEY!!

Zelda: Oh my lord

Navi: Did you defuse it?

Zelda: We're gonna die

Keroanne1: (downstairs) We're gonna die

Link: How can you tell?

Shadow: Because the bomb is gonna go off in T -5 seconds

Midna: WHAT!?

Shadow: 4

Ilia: MOMMY!!

Shadow: 3

Link: IM TOO YOUNG TO DIE!!

Shadow: 2

Twilight: WHOEVER LIVE TELL MY GRANDMOTHER SHE NEEDS TO LOSE SOME WEIGHT!!

Everyone: (stares blankly at Twilight)

Shadow: 1 (camera shuts off)

(camera comes back on)

Everyone: (staring at Twilight)

Zelda: TWILIGHT YOU IDIOT THAT WASN'T A BOMB!!

Twilight: It's wasn't?

Navi: Actually it was. When Twilight had her memory she stole it from the government. But they came and defused it

Ilia: Never (slap) plant (slap) a bomb (slap) in this (slap) household (slap) AGAIN! (slap)

Twilight: Ow….

Keroanne1: Ok um…. Lets do the next review

Link: It's from _**456blaa **_and he/she is asking

_**Ok this is funny. I love it and i have some dares.**_

1. Zelda a Midna (human form) go into a bed room with link and...blushes you know... o and here is a baseball bat for each of you to help with the you know (make shure to hit him hard those base ball bats were not cheep.)  
?you think im that perveted to make Zelda and Midna do it with link?  
ok dare for just link. Link become a hot guy(not that most girls don't think you are already) and do hard labor on a farms feilds (no fancy machines). O ya the girls get to watch you (this is the equivlant of the girls washing the horse)

Navi: maybe you can die down your blue light and come over to my place some time. ;) (put on a dress, my fariy guy friends is not gay and is actualy a nice guy)

O now I know somthing else to make you all do... Evil laughter that makes people scared

...

...

HAVE A PARTY!

Zelda: (takes a baseball bat and hands one to Midna) Lets go Link.

Link: What? (gets dragged in a room) Wait what are you doing? AHHH!! OW OW OW OW!! STOP IT!! I wont be able to have kids……..

Ilia: Uh………

Navi: Pathetic

Twilight: (re reads the review and smiles) Link…

Link: What? (reads review) Oh my lord

Ilia: (kicks him out in the hot sun)

Link: DAMMIT!! Oh well better put these stack of hay away. Wow its hot (takes off shirt)

All girls including me: (drooling)

Link: (Comes back in without a shirt)

Twilight: (stares) Thinking: nice abs

Navi: ?? What? Uh.. thank you I'll just stay here with my friends

Everyone: PARTY!!

Keroanne1: YAY A PARY!!

Shadow: All right! I'll get the Ice cream!!

Zelda: I'll get the soda!

Twilight: I'll get the mechanical bull!

Everyone: (stares at Twilight)

Ilia: OK! This next review is from _**UnbowedUnbroken **_and he/she is asking

_**cracks knuckles- My turn to review. -starts laughing maniacally-.  
Dares for Link:  
Walk into a biker bar with the tights on. Let the butt-kicking begin!  
Dares for Zelda: Catfight with Ilia and Midna...With Link caught in the middle. Mwuhahahahahaha!-chokes on own spit-. Well, that was embarassing.**_

Shadow: (throws Link in a biker bar)

Link: (High pitched voice) Mommy…..

Biker: Hey that dudes wearing tights! GET HIM!! (shuts off camera)

Midna: OK! No need to see what happens there.

Navi: Why?

Midna: 3……….2………..1

Link: (comes in bruised and beat up)

Midna: There you go

Link: Mmm… chocolate

Zelda Ilia and Midna: MINE!! (catfight for chocolate)

Link: ALL I WANTED WAS CHOCOLATE!!

Shadow: This next review is from _**Hakusgirl Katsuko **_and she is asking

_**LOL i dare Ilia and Midna to sing "Ready, Set, Go!" By Tokio Hotel. LOL sorry i like making them sing and Link is always getting the singing dares. GREAT JOB!**_

Link: (setting up singing equipment)

Ilia: Uh…fine come on Midna

Midna: But I want chocolate

Ilia: Midna NOW

Midna: Yes ma'am

Ilia: _We we're running through the town (I don't know the lyrics if I'm wrong correct me)_

_Midna Our senses have been drowned_

Navi: ENOUGH ALREADY!!

Zelda: (Throws tomato)

Keroanne1: This next review is from me!

_**I am messed up, aren't I?  
CRAP! I don't know how to play poker!  
-steals gun from Twilight- No guns for you.  
I'm going to look that thing up on Youtube now. I have an account!  
Now for my questions...  
Link, is green your favorite color? It would make sense as to why you always wear it.  
Navi, why are you so dang annoying!? There must be a reason!**_

Link: My favorite color is green because that's Twilights favorite color so she made me say it

Shadow: Keroanne1 Navi was BORN ANNOYING

Zelda: All our last review for today! It's from _**Nakori Elvenborn **_and she is asking

_**hm, maybe this will work.**_

Ties up illia and kicks her off a cliff

I Dare Link to help me make cookies and to share them with the cast!

Ilia: AHH!! SHARKS!!

Twilight: He he he. (and I like Ilia too)

Link: Wow cookies!!

Twilight: MY COOKIES!! (devours them all)

Everyone: TWILIGHT!!...(Ilia in the backround) Can someone get me out from the ocean?

**ATTENTION. Ok guys I know you like reviewing. But now they're too long. So do the author a favor and make'em short kay?**


	9. Chapter 9

Twilight: HI EVERYBODY!!

Fans: There she is! GET HER!!!! (brings out rusty anchor)

Keoranne1: HOLD IT!!

Shadow: Twilight couldnt continue the story before because she was grounded

Link: But she is still alive unfortunatly

Zelda: But now since we have tons of reviews we'll be able to have lots of fun.

Midna: Before Twilight got grounded

Twilight: Thats me!

Midna: (sweatdrops) Before she got grounded

Twilight: Me!

Midna: (geting aggravted) .Grounded

Twilight: MEE!!!!

Midna: (hits her with a bat) Before she got grounded she got a review that EXTREMELY LONG.

Navi: So we're gonna do it another time when we dont have alot of reviews.

Keroanne1: Now then let's start these reviews

Ilia: This one is from _**toastwolf117 **_

_**LoL, roastwolf I could not stop laughing after that! okay lets see, we got a lot more dares today, (clears throat) okay, Number 1 is to... bzt. bzt... =Transmission to Toastwolf has been lost= =incoming transmission from new user=**_

bzt.

Hello ATZC (ask the zelda crew), I want to play a game. Link and toastwolf are locked in a bathroom. They are both chained to the floor. Link has until 6:00 to kill toastwolf. if he fails I will kill zelda and lila and leave them in there to rot. Let the games begin... bzt. bzt.  
=transmission lost=

Everyone: (stares at Link) (knocking at door)

Twilight: I'll get it!

Everyone: NO!!!!

toastwolf117: Hey everyone (stares at Link) It's time

Link: (holding a pistol) I'm warning you! BACK DEMON!! (fires pistol)

toastwolf117: I'm immortal, you cant harm me

Midna and Navi: (brings popcorn)

Zelda: Ilia you do know what happens if Link loses right?

Ilia: (boarding a plane to mexico)

Shadow: sissy

Keroanne1: Alright let's watch the games in the camera (turns on security camera)

Link: (still holding the pistol) DROP DEMON!!!

toastwolf117: (brings out axe)

Link: Even though your immortal you have no fighting skill like the hero of hyrule AND Twilight accidently spilled something in your drink that made you mortal again.

toastwolf117: shit...(get killed with a bullet to the head)

Ilia: (returned from Mexico) YAY!! YOU WON!!!

Twilight: (playing with blockes)

Midna and navi; (snoring in the backround)

Shadow and Keoranne1: (fighting over whose hotter Kiba or super models from "Abrecrombie")

Yogi and someone random: (hunting for food)

Fans: OK WE GET THE POINT!!!

Midna: This next review is from _**Senom299 **_

_**YAYZ!**_

*thwacks Twilight* DO. YOU. ?!?!?!

Navi and Tingle: FIGHT TO THE DEATH(dead as in dead for two chapters*

Illia, Ganon and Welda: Do the can-can while wearing a gothic Hyrulian model wear. LINK U CAN WATCH...BUT NO SMILY!

Midna: I LUV U! Am I still in your army of fans you made in that one fanfic?

Ganon:Kick yourself.

Link: bite Illia Ganon and Welda

Princess Welda:LOL WELDA!

Twiligh: (gets thwacked) WHO DID THAT?!?!?!

Navi: FINALLY!!! I GET TO KILL THAT THING THAT WANTED TO BE A FAIRY!!

Tingle: WHY WONT YOU LOVE ME!?!? (Navi brings out a shotgun) AHH!!! (Holds a sword and navi is stupid enough to collide with it)

Shadow: Holy cow

Twilight: Cows arent holy. Well maybe to some people but- (gets thwacked)

Everyone: YES 2 CHAPTERS WITHOUT NAVI WHHOOOO!!!

Keroanne1: And to celebrate (brings Ganon"dork" ) Kick yourself

Twilight: I'll do it! (kicks him in his "ahem")

Ganondorf:: (sniff) I wont have kids now

Zelda: Please like anyone would wanna have kids with you

Shadow: NEXT REVIEW!!!

Twilight: This review is from _**insanity's child **_

_**dont shot link! Make him go out with GanonDORK**_

Link: I'D RATHER GET SHOT!!!!!

Twilight: (fires a pistol)

Link: (dodges) WHAT THE HELL IS THAT FOR!?!?

Twilight: You said you wanted to get shot. (gets thwacked) WHO KEEPS DOING THAT!?!

Keroanne1: This next review is from _**Nakori17**_

_**i had a name change...**_

I dare Ganondorf to sing im to sexy!

Ganondorf: Oh yeah! That's what im talking about! _I'm to sexy for my shirt to sexy for my shirt it hurts._

Everyone: SIKE!! YOU'RE NOT SEXY!!!

Link: This next review is from-

Zelda: NO MINE! (throws an anchor at him) This next review is from _**Ridere93 **_

_**ohh... you want it short?  
I understand  
Just do the one where Ganondorf PAWNCH Link. :)**_

Link I dare you to torture anyone of your choice by watching a 2 Hour... no wait, a month special of...DORA THE EXPLORER! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!:) I'M SO EVIL!

and link just because I'm doing a favor for you doesn't mean I'm nice though, I still think Ike is a better swordsman than you and Mario is a better person.

Link: Mario is a fat plumber and Ike can go suck Zelda's- (slap)

Zelda: PERVERT!

Link: Come to think of it I know who can go watch Dora

Mario And Ike: (chained from the ceiling) HELP WE'RE WATCHING DORA!!!

Link: Mwahaha

Shadow: You're starting to get the hang of it

Twilight: WHEE!!! (riding on an elephant)

Keroanne1: O_O Ok then I-

Ganondorf: (punches Link which sends him flying ten feet in the air) Ahhhh now that I liked

Ilia: This next review is from _**Kaiser Spartan **_

_**OMG YOU UPDATED WHO THE FRACK ARE YOU!? *faints from pure shock*  
anyway**_

Link:  
Ruto please...  
Shadow (not the hedgehog) with these two machine guns (gives Link two machine guns that are fully loaded)  
3. Eat this pie (gives Link normal apple pie)

Twilight:  
1. Eat this muffin (gives Twilight muffin that is obviously: radioactive, have cockroaches in it, glue, Barney's guts (do not ask where i got those from), crap, and other disgusting stuff that i can't write here  
2. Do not puke or get your stomach pumped

Link: YESS!!! WHOO HOO!! Oh RUTOOoooooo

Ruto: Yes my love?

Link: DIE!!! (shoots her) AHAHAMEWHAHA (coughs) AHAHAHAH!!!! And now for a celebration a pie! (starts to devour pie)

Twilight: Yaya muffin! (starts to eats muffin) Not bad the blood is the best part

Midna: I think she is getting her memory back

Ilia: (shudders)

Keroanne1: This nest review is from _**stateofmind7337**_

_**The can-can goes like this:  
Can-can can you do the can-can? Can you do the can-can? Can you do the, can you do the can-can? (repeat)  
At least that's how I learned it.  
And this really is funny. I have a dare for Link:  
I have a pet dragon named Revix and he's ferocious. And oh, yeah,  
HE HATES LINK. A LOT. He also hates frilly dreeses, Flamenco dancing, polka dots and the color pink, especially when it's put with brown. So, I dare Link to dress up in a frilly pink-and-brown polka-dotted dress and Flamenco dance in front of Revix when he's hungry. Then when Revix attacks Link the rest of them have to try and kill Revix using MARSHMALLOW GUNS!**_

And if that doesn't work, another dare:  
Tie Link to a chair and invite Ganondorf and Zant and Vaati etc. to shoot him with marshmallows coated in superglue! Then release a horde of marshmallow-obbsessed kindergarteners on him and watch him scream like a little girl!!

10/10

HT

Twilight: I like the first dare RIANIX!!!!

Everyone: DUCK IN COVER!!

Rianix: (comes through the door non-destructively)

Zelda: Well that was-

Rianix: (sneezes)

Zelda: (burned to a crisp)

Link: (in a pink and brown frilly dress and danceing the Flamenco) I could get used to this

stateofmind7337: (rides on his/her dragon) It's the fight to the death!!!!

Twilight: (on Rianix) CHARGE!!!

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**3 HOURS LATER**

(whole battle staduim on fire and coverd in blood)

Twilight: (panting) I will never give up!

Rianix: (roars and charges and Revix)

CCCCCCCCRRRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Revix: (Cries in pain of his broken leg)

stateofmind7337: You may have one this time but that battle is not over yet! (leaves)

Keroanne1 and Shadow: .AWESOME!!!

Midna: This next review is from..........Keroanne1 hmm...

_**NO! You stoled the cookies!  
Uh... now, to the point.  
I want to know... er... oh! Let's see if this helps Twilight! What is my name on Youtube?  
Link, I just have to say that you're an idiot.**_

Link:..........

Keroanne1: hehe

Twilight: What?

Keroanne1: NOOOO!!!!!!! SHE DOESNT REMEMBER!!!

Shadow: (slaps her upside the head) Get it together girl! This next review is from _**pickels **_

_**Zelda and Link- Q: do you like each other? You have to answer. Okay a dare for you two. You two have to eat a bar of Hershey's chocolate for 3 mins. using only your mouths and the author must describe and detail AND tell me Zelda and Link's new feelings... P.s. I'm female & sorry if it was long!**_

Link and Zelda: WHAT!!!!

Twilight: YAY!! And I get to describe it!!

_The warm glow from the candles in the soft small room gave it a more romantic senery. Link stared at Zelda then at the chocolate bar infront of him.  
"Zelda" he said. "Are you hungry?" Zelda looked into his eyes and smiled the warm light from the candles dimly illuminating her face.  
"I am actually" She said. They both pucked up the chocolate bar and put it infront of their face. And ate with only their mouth. Closser and closer, the chocolate bar was diminishing. Link could feel Zelda's breath on his face, with one inch of chocolate between them.......A GIANT ELEPHANT CAME TO RUIN IT ALL!!!!_

Everyone: (slaps Twilight) DO IT RIGHT!

Twilight: (sigh) fine

_..............soon their lips were about to touch and they kissed _**I AM NOT ENJOYING THIS!!! **_passion filled in their hearts it was as if a huge weight has been lifted off of Link. He enjoyed every minute of it. Zelda wrapped her arms around Link's neck and Link wrapped his around her small waist. _**HELP ME.**_ They fell onto the floor carassing each other. Link was undoing Zelda's dress massaging her soft and tender skin, Zelda was kgjdokfgspoi_

Twilight: HEY!

Zelda: (blushing) ENOUGH!

Twilight: (looks at her descriptive story) whoops got a little too far therer heh sorry!!

Link: (also blushing)

Ilia: This next review is from _**keybladeboy**_

_**Holy crap, you guys updated. Before I say my dares, I have to do this. -slaps toastwolf- WHAT THE HELL'S YOURE PROBLEM? BRINGING THE TAILS DOLL IN HERE LIKE THAT...DO YOU WANT TO DIE?**_

Ahem...Sorry. Now then,

Author: Read my Truth or Dare fic. Please.

Navi: Challenge Rianix to a battle to the fiery, gory, violent death. Author, you HAVE to give Navi a chance at a fair fight. Otherwise, all these people that have bought tickets from me are going to be very, very angry.

Author: I dare you to kill the winner of the fight.

Link: I dare you to kill yourself right in front of Twilight.

Ilia: See Link's dare.

Shadow: Navi died remember? Yeah we are gonna do this dare another time but the second part.....

Link: (Dies infront of Twilight)

Ilia: NOOOOOooooooo.......

Keroanne1: ppssssttt you're supposed to sound more dramatic..

Ilia: I'm going to Canada

Everyone: What?

Ilia: Bye. (boarding a plane to Canada)

Shadow: Well that it everyone

Keroanne1: Be sure to review

Midna: AND BRING ME COOKIES!!!

Twilight: (gets thwacked) WHAT THE (censored) All this (censored) and (censored) Is driving me (cccceeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnsssssssoooooooooooorrrrrrrreeeeeeeedddddddddddd)

Everyone: (stares at Twilight)

Link: Ummm....bye?

Twilight: ELEPHANT! (gets thwacked)

_**Hakusgirl Katsuko:OMG LOL. i especially loved this part**_

"Keroanne1: Here ya go Midna (hands her ball and chain)

Midna: (evil grin) Ready Link?

Link: Let me just- (gets hit)

Midna: Was that too early?

Zelda: (thinking) Why am I even here?"

that was so funny! ok i'm braindead and can't think of any dares or anything, so sorry i guess you'll have to rely on your other fans this time :P bye 

_**toastwolf117: HELP ME! (if you dont get the messege update faster) (liver is stabbed) (passes out)**_

_**Michiero Benrujironu: You want short? Fine. Here's the shortest review ever.**_

*shoots everyone with a plasma gun*

Isn't it obvious I am ** sending this?


	10. Chapter 10

Twilight: (milking a cow)

Keroanne1: Ok why are you milking a cow?

Twilight: Oh we're on? Ah well there goes my free time.

Shadow: You milk cows in your free time?

Twilight: Yeah so?

Keroanne1 and Shadow: (slaps her upside the head) COME ON! REMEMBER DAMMIT!

Link: Are you gonna tell them the news?

Shadow: Oh yeah! We-

Twilight: WE ARE GONNA HAVE MILK YOUR OWN COW DAY!

Everyone: (slaps Twilight)

Zelda: We THINK we might have a new host

Ilia: emphasis on the THINK

Shadow:…………….

Twilight: What's the matter?

Shadow: You were gonna kick me out

Twilight: Kick you out of what?

Link: ARE YOU THAT PATHETIC!? THE STORY YOU IMBECIL!

Twilight: (cries in a corner)

Midna: Oh now look at what you did.

Zelda: You made her cry!

Ilia: How dare you!

Keroanne1: It's ok Twilight he didn't mean it

Shadow: Yeah he did

Twilight: (magically brings out an axe) I'LL KILL HIM!!!! (chases Link)

Link: WHY!? WHY WHEN I HAVE THE COURAGE TO YELL AT TWILIGHT SHE COMES AFTER ME!?!

Midna: Err….let's just introduce the new host

Zelda: Please welcome Runo!

Runo: Hi!

Shadow:………..

Runo: What?

Shadow: nothing

Runo: Hi Twilight!

Twilight: Hi person I never met before!

Keroanne1: Ahh! I thought you were chasing Link.

Link: She was but she got distracted by steak

Midna: (sigh) What are we gonna do with her?

Ilia: Alright let's get this show on the road! Would you like to read the first review Runo?

Runo: Sure! This one is from _**toastwolf117**_

_**keybladeboy I am going to (beep) you up you (beep)er! I am sorry twighlit but this cant go unoticed! Me an keybladeboy will have a epic battle of epic proportions in an epic room with epic... EPICNESS! you and link are aloud to choose sides (you cant choose the same guy)! keybladeboy if you are reading this you son of a (beep)ing (beep)! im going to tear off your (beep) and shove it up your (beep)! (beep beep) and then (beep) so (beep) with (beep beep)! so then you'll have to (beep) sideways! (beep)!**_

Runo: er….

Link: Don't worry you'll get used to it

Shadow: Twilight where's your cell phone?

Twilight: (submerging her phone in soup)

Shadow: Twilight why did you put your cell phone in soup?

Twilight: I wanna see if it can float.

Shadow: (snatches phone from Twilight) Give me that! (text messages keybladeboy)

Blade: Hi you guys called?

Toastwolf: Well actually I did. (evil laugh)

Midna: (brings popcorn)

Ilia: (also eating popcorn)

Blade: Ok so what do you want?

Toastwolf: read the review (hands over the review)

Blade: (reads it) Ok if you wanna (walks into the "Epicness" room)

Runo: (whispers) Now what?

Link: Just watch (gunfire)

Keroanne1: DUCK IN COVER!! (dodges bullet)

Runo: (dodges bullet) This is not what I signed up for! (gunfire)

Shadow: Runo watch out!

Runo: What? (bullet flies toward her)

Twilight: I'll save you! (brings out frying pan and hits her)

Runo: (falls to the floor and bullet misses her) (explosion) (gunfire ceased)

Zelda: (thwacks Twilight) You idiot! A simple push would be enough

Twilight: Yeah but this was more fun

Runo: (angry) Ohhhh Twiliiiillllliiiigghhhhtt

Twilight: Yes?

Runo: (Hits her with a bat) NEVER DO THAT AGAIN!

Midna: Hey guys they stopped firing!

Keroanne1: Let's go see who one!

Runo: (Pulls Twilight in front of her) If we go in there Twilight in my personal shield!

Ilia: I think she's getting the hang of it.

Everyone: (walks into the "Epicness" room)

Link: You've gotta be kidding me

Shadow: Well it explains the explosion

Rianix: (sitting on top of keybladeboy and toastwolf117)

Zelda: Are they dead?

Ilia: (takes a stick and pokes them)

Midna: Ilia you gotta do it like this (brings out a bat) BAM!!

Keybladeboy and toastwolf117: (motionless)

Runo: Does this always happen?

Twilight: No not ALWAYS more like 3 times a day

Zelda: don't worry you'll get used to it

Twilight: (grabs the two bodies and feeds them to Rianix)

Everyone: TWILIGHT!!!

Twilight: What?

Everyone: (looks at keybladeboy and toastwolf117 still underneath Rianix)

Keroanne1: But if they are there then who did you feed Rianix?

Twilight: The cow I was milking earlier (gets thwacked) Not that again!

Link: Let's do the next review it's from-

Keroanne1: ME!

Link: Yeah her

_**StOp SwEaRiNg, TwIlIgHt! It NoT nIcE!  
Everyone else has a dragon. I want one. -brings out HUGE dragon- This is Fred.  
Fred: Yo.  
What do you want to do, Fred?  
Fred: Have a big dragon fight.  
And that is my dare. Fred wants to fight. And what Fred wants, he'd best get... or he might eat something that's not good for his digestive system, like rocks.  
Fred: Me want Oreos.  
Oh, yeah, Link had better get us some Oreos or we'll BOTH eat him alive in front of everyone. And they have to be made of pure gold, and have to be signed by Utada Hikaru. (A Japanese singer whom I happen to be obsessed with.)**_

Link: WHERE THE HELL AM I GONNA FIND OREOS LIKE THAT!!?

Keroanne1: I don't know

Fred: Yo

Link: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! (runs into Keroanne1's lala land to find the oreos)

Fred: Do you think he'll get 'em?

Keroanne1: No not really

Twilight: Rianix look boy!

Rianix (stares at Fred) Hi

Twilight: AHH! Since when did you learn to talk!!?

Rianix: Since I was born you just didn't notice

Twilight: TT (hugs Rianix) I have been neglecting my baby so much TT

Keroanne1: All the hosts get dragons too!

Shadow: (a huge red dragon comes near her) Whoa

Runo: (a huge blue dragon walks up to her) O_O

Twilight: YAY! What are you gonna call them? Are they a boy or girl?

Runo and Shadow: We'll decide that later

Keroanne1: DRAGON FIGHT!

Hosts: (climb there dragon) CHARGE!!!

_And the dragons fought. Fred had amazing agility while Runo's dragon had speed by its side. Shadow's dragon was capable of many combos. And Twilight's dragon had strength by its side. The continued to fight through the stadium trying to burn their opponent until Rianix had had enough. He breathed in then let out an ENORMOUS black fire ball burning everyone even the hosts._

Hosts: (just got back from the emergency room)

Runo: (thwacks Keroanne1) Brilliant Idea! Now they're gonna bill the studio!

Shadow: And you know how much the emergency room costs

Fred: (Roars) Don't yell at her!

Runo's dragon: (roars back) Don't yell at Runo either!

Twilight: OK! Er… Rianix? Why don't you show the others their room?

Rianix: Sure. Listen up! All you dragons get a cave for you and it's just as big as you are

Fred: Wait, me want oreos.

Link: (all the way back from wherever) Ok I had to go all the way to the unknown but here are those cookies you wanted

Fred and Keroanne1: Alright! (devours golden cookies)

Rianix: Boy and I thought me and Twilight were messed up.

Dragons: Go to their caves

Zelda: Well that was interesting

Midna: THAT WAS AWSOME!

Ilia: Alright! This review is from _**Servant of the Underworld **_

_**this is so funny, and it is so good keep it up**_

and i have a dares for everyone:

Link: i give you the death note and you can write anyone's name in it and they will die in the next 40 seconds unless you will write a condition

Midna: torture Zant and the ugly green monster that kidnapped poor colin

Zelda: make out with ruto

navi: squash tingle with a giant hammer each time he says his motto or the word fairy

Ganon: make out with ilia and the author

and that's all folks

Link: (receives death note) AWSOME! (writes the word "Dora" on the death note)

Dora: (On TV) Hola kids! I'm Dora! And this is my amigo (dies)

Random Kid: Mommy why is Dora having a seizure?

Link: (shudders) That felt good……(twitches)

Runo: Whose Zant?

Zant: ICE CREAM!!

Twilight: MINE!!! (tackles him)

Runo: Hmm on second thought I don't wanna know

Midna: (slaps Link) Why did you kill Dora!? I was gonna use her to torture Zant! Oh well I guess I have to use him.

Ugly green monster: (squeals like a pig)

Midna: And you too come (drags them to watch Barney)

Link: Man I should've killed him

Twilight: Hey guys wanna hear my poem on how I killed Barney?

Everyone: NO

Twilight: OK! _On top of a mountain all covered in blood_

_Is where I killed Barney with my rifle shot-gun_

_I went to his funeral _

_I went to his grave_

_Some people threw flowers_

_But I threw a grenade_

_As he rose from the dead I took my bazooka_

_And BAM! Off went his bog giant head_

Link: (Twitches)

Zelda: Why exactly did you write this?

Twilight: Because it's all true

Everyone: O_O

Midna: (walks out of the room) mwhaha they're watching Barney

Twilight: What!?

Shadow: That's why we were all scared. BARNEY ISNT REAL HE'S JUST A GUY IN A COSTUME!!

Twilight: oops

Keroanne1: Let's just read the next review

Twilight: This next review is from _**Kinkiro0013 **_she's my buddy on youtube!

_**scary music starts***_

Everyone except Twilight- *hiding behind a couch*

Link- Who's doing the dare this time?

*mysterious person lifts up couch and burns it with a flamethrower* It's...it's....

Kenkiro- I'M BAAA-AACK!! Muahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaaaaa!!! *starts burning characters except author and Midna* And you still rock, Midna! *gives her flamethrower* Happy Birthday! *gets a new couch for author and brings out list of dares* Oh, I almost forgot! *gives Twilight a closet of Final Fantasy weapons; gunblades, spears, swords, pointy things, etc* You know what to do!

Dares for everyone!!!!

-Everyone has to take a turns to read Navi's thoughts for a whole day, while navi switches off with a brick in a nuclear bomb testing area every time; that means you all are likely to hear way worse than what you hear her talk, and she gets exploded every time...Aren't I evil? *innocent-looking smile* Midna only has to hear for an hour, cuz she's awesome!

Link-

-....let me think...You are to make the goddesses extremely angry and face their punishment  
- Then to face my torture right after; -Then after that, clean out Rainix's dung without a gas mask, and you cannot stop until it's all gone! Ha!!!

-One more thing- Battle to the Death!!!! I'm happy now!

For the battle; ...5 min....

Link's limbs are gone, his spine is half-way out, his gut is gutted, his ribcage is revealed, and his head is twisted 180 degrees

Kenkiro - *covered in blood and guts* ...You're a wimp!!! I've seen wolves do better, but I'd never kill them! They are my allies!!! Which reminds me, dinner time wolfies!!! *all the wolves from wolf rain and every other anime start devouring the rest of him* Can you revive him with TWO over caffinated Navi's in his head author? I want to see if his head explodes...

----------------------------------

And I'll stop there cuz I'm on a writer's block, and the form I want you to use is the human form in the video which I'm sending you!! XD

Keroanne1: O_O wow that's long

Midna: YAY! I GOT A FLAMETHROWER!

Shadow: (takes it away) NO! You burned down our couch when you got one!

Midna: But the review gave us a new one!

Shadow: THEN YOUR GONNA BURN DOWN THE NEW ONE!!

Twilight: HEhehehehe more toys…………………….(in her happy place)

Keroanne1: Sorry Navi is dead and I don't think Twilight is bringing her back this time

Link: YOU EVIL LITTLE GIRL!!!! TT (goes to the goddesses) I THINK YOUR ALL FAT!!!

Goddesses: WHAT!!?!? (burns him with a lightning bolt)

Link: Well I thought that was gonna be much worse (gets dragged by Kinkiro) NOOO!!!!!! (gets thrown into Rianix's cave) FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODDESSES!!!

Goddesses: WE DON'T LOVE YOU!

Link: YOU GET MY POINT! (starts to choke because of the smell)

Twilight: Well that wraps up another random episode of this story

Link: Which I think will never end

Runo: Bye everyone!

Twilight: WAIT!

Keroanne1: What?

Twilight: I just want to say the Shadow changed her username to _**Lady Chrystinne HAHAH! I TOLD YOU I'D DO IT!**_


	11. Chapter 11

Twilight: SPLEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!! (running around in circles)

Keroanne1: OK WHO GAVE HER COOKIES

Link: (hit her with a mallet)

Shadow: (ahem) Well now that that's done Twilight are you ready?

Twilight: OH YEA! As you all know a lot of people want to be a host right?

Everyone: (nods head)

Twilight: Well the first person who reviews becomes a host! For one chapter at least. Oh and Runo? YOU LIED!!!! YOU DIDN'T REVIEW!!! SO YOUR NOT A HOST ANYMORE!!!! (ahem) This will happen every chapter

Midna: O….k?

Zelda: Let's get down to business shall we?

Ilia: This one is from _**Servant of the Underworld.**_

_**Yay! you put me in.**_

OKAY! Ready! more dares!

Ganondork get ready to listen to bat out of hell song I Will do anything for love but i won't do that and take over the world with Light Yagami

Link save the world from ganondork and light with the help of L then kill him afterwards

Keyblade boy and toastwolf i chanellage you guys to a dual and i pick my master arucard to fight with me

Okay writer's block and gotta catch up with my story

see ya

author put me in please cuz this is so funny.

Twilight: hehe

Link: Why are you laughing?

Twilight: Because I have no idea what this person said!

Zelda: (sweatdrops)

Link: Who the hell is "L"?

Shadow: Can your write something we can understand? But that duel is a nice choice

Keybladeboy: (magically appears in a towl) HEY! THIS ISNT MY BACKYARD!

Zelda: You go in your backyard with a towel?

Blade: yea

Midna: (collapses)

Toastwolf: (falls through the ceiling)

Twilight: THANKS RIANIX!!!

Blade and Wolf: YOU!

Blade: (Takes out a sword)

Wolf: (pull out a flamethrower)

Ilia: HOW IN THE HELL DO YOU PEOPLE TAKE THING OUT OF THE BLUE LIKE THAT

Twilight: (pulls out an elephant)

Ilia: (collapses) never mind

Keroanne1: YOU! (stares at Blade and wolf) I knew someone took my toys!

Shadow: Keroanne1 are you ok?

Keroanne1: (sprouts demon wings)

Midna: O_O

Twilight: WOW! I want to do that! (grunts) Hmmm….(grunts harder) ehhh(grunts her hardest) (crack)

Shadow: I'm surrounded by idiots

Keroanne1: (eats Wolf and Blade)

Zelda: (flicks her nose continuously) Drop it. Drop it. Drop it!

Keroanne1: (throws up)

Link: I swear this get weirder and weirder

Ilia: NEXT!

Shadow: This one is from _**linkluvr01 **_

_**omg! that is so hilarious! i have some dares for you too!**_

Link: ask zelda out, run into a wall that was randomly placed at top speed, and purposely trip over your own feet and fall on your face!

Zelda: when link asks you out, slap him (very hard) then laugh at his pain from the things above!

Midna: eat 200 pounds of chocolate and become very hyper and annoying!  
thats all for now!

Link: I SWEAR ARE ALL YOU PEOPLE ON CRACK!?!?!? (sigh and then flips his hair) So, Zelda, me you tonight at 8 and a bottle of beer? (S. L. A. P.)

Zelda: YEA RIGHT LOSER!!!! BWAHAHH!!!!!!!

Midna: And now for my favorite part!

Twilight: (gives him a magic potion that make him run as fast as Sonic the hedgehog)

Link: (runs) WHY CANT I STOP!?!?! (BOOM) Why….is there a …….brick wall…..in the…middle…of the….STUDIO!?!?!

Everyone: Twilight

Twiight: YUP! I didn't know where to put it

Link: Oh well, I guess it cant be helped. (walks then trips and falls on his face) OH COME ON!!!

Zelda: BWAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!! This is such a fun review!!!!!!

Midna: HHEEELPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MMPH!

Everyone: TWILIGHT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!?!?!

Twilight: (cramming chocolate in Midna's mouth) EAT! YOU. MUST. EAT.

Midna: (grabs Twilight with her hand/hair) Breeg breeg oout mot bal!

Link: Oh great she's talking like that again!

Shadow: Wait a minuet, you mean you never understood what she said throughout the entire game?

Link: (cleaning his teeth) Yeah why?

Keroanne1: How the hell have you managed to understand what she was saying?

Link and Zelda: We're really good at reading subtitles backwards.

Everyone: (sweatdrops)

Ilia: MOVING ON!

Midna: Eiot mea breeg dow on mowt wah

Shadow: SHUT UP!!! (hit her with an anchor)

Link: She said that the review was from Keroanne1

Keroanne1: SPLEE!!!!

_**Fred: Kero-chan, don't touch me cookies 'less ya wants die.  
... Okay, Fred. -notices everyone- Oh, right! This is the part where I tell you what sort of evil things I want to do next, isn't it?  
First of all, welcome to the group, Runo. -gives her giant Lego Indiana Jones- Merry Christmas and Happy Qwanza or however you spell that.  
Link, I DEMAND that you get me more golden Oreos because they have some sort of addictive quality about them that makes me want to eat them some more and more and more and more and... happy summer chickens!  
Ilia, join a bull fight with red clothes on.  
Midna, lick your elbow, which is impossible just in case you didn't know.  
Fred and Rianx must go have tea together in the British Queen's Palace with her. They must also where a hoop skirt and dance to the macarena.  
Zelda, go emo/gangster. Either one works.**_

Twilight: Sorry Runo died

Keroanne1: O_o What the hell am I supposed to do with this then? (holds giant Lego indiana jones)

Twilight: Hmm…I know! Let's give it to Obama! (slap) WHAT WAS THAT FOR!?

Shadow: For being an idiot why would he want it?

Obama: WEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!! I GOT THE LEGO INDIANA JONES I ALWAYS WANTED!!!! THANKS MOM!!!

Keroanne1: …….anyway! (demonic voice) LINK

Link: Dear Lord have mercy (runs back into Keroanne1's imgaingation)

Keroanne1: Dahhhh akjdhfsalkjdfh (drools)

Ilia: How in the world did I get into a red bull fighter costume? It's not even halloween yet!

Twilight and Shadow: (smiles evily)

Ilia: Guys what are you gonna do with that rope? W-wait s-s-stop! NO!!!!!!! (gets dragged to a bull fight)

Bull: Hellooooooooooo cutie! (chases her)

Ilia: WHEN THE **** IN THE WORLD DID BULLS TALK!!!

Zelda: (gaps) Ilia when did you hear that word!?

Ilia: (take a pitchfork to distract bull) From Twilight in one of the previous chapters!

Everyone: (stares at Twilight)

Twilight: What? It slipped out

Midna: Oh really so now she is gonna say "Apple farts" everytime something like that happens?

Twilight: yup

Midna: Awww man!

Shadow: What?

Midna: I got chocolate on my elbow! (tries to lick elbow)

Keroanne1: -_-" Midna?

Midna: (still trying) Yea?

Shadow: (thwacks her upside the head) IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!!!!

Zelda: (in her black cloak) Hi guys……

Ilia: (back from the bull fight) Zelda what happened to you?

Zelda: Life…….it's just a spiraling world of depression and suicide

Twilight: Aww I feel your pain (hands her razor)

Ilia: TWILIGHT! At times like this your supposed to make sure she DOESN'T do that

Twilight: Oh really? Well how the hell should I know? I still have amnesia and I only doing this damn thig out of boredom

Keroanne1 and Shadow: (sniff)

Twilight: Wait don't take it that way! UGH! Where's Link when you need her- I mean him

Link: In (Keroanne1's mind) Man what does this girl do? (opens door and blushes) Well now I know what she does in her free time. Hmm…..AHA! (finds cookies) Now how do I get out? (finds piece of paper and smiles evily) Mwahah now I know how to get her.

Keroanne1: (watching a fly) O_O laifhalshfaslkjdhf (drools)

Zelda: IN COMING!!! (ducks)

Link: (Comes in on a canible unicorn)

Shadow: KILL IT!!!! (shoots a machine gun randomly)

Twilight: OW MY EYE!

Everyone: (gasp) REALLY!?

Twilight: (blinks) oh wait that's ketchup

Link: I found your cookies

Keroanne1: YAY! Oh Freeeeeeeeeeeddddddddddddd!

Fred: Yo, where's me cookies? (devours plate)

Link: (smiles evily and shows piece of paper)

Keroanne1: O_O HOW DID YOU GET THAT!?!?!

Link: (reads paper) _My dear sweet Kevin_

Keroanne1: NO! (tries to grab Link)

Shadow: (ties her to a pole) I WANNA HEAR THIS!

Link: _My dear sweet Kevin_

_I realize that my love for you has gone._

_Our romance has split just like a pair of torn pants_

_We live in a cruel life, that will stab you like a knife_

_I wish that our relationship was easy as I feel this letter getting cheesy_

_Please stay with me because Twilight is crazy_

_My eyes are filled with tears and are getting really hazy_

_I wish you stayed with me and not left me for some *****_

_Now I can see you 2 getting hitched_

_Goodbye Kevin I hope your happy_

_Because this goodbye letter had gotten really sappy_

_Your's for never more_

_Keroanne1 (who has just commited suicide)_

Twilight: BWAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Keroanne1: (starts to cry)

Shadow: Twilight! Look what you did!

Link: (thwacks her upside the head)

Zelda: My God Twilight, that was really mean

Shadow: We're gonna cut the story short because of 2 reasons

Zelda: #1 because we have a hysterical breakdown

Keroanne1: B-but I-I-I thought h-he loved me!!! (bawls)

Midna: and 2 because Twilight has to get off the computer

Twilight: BEFORE YOU GO THIS IS A MESSAGE FOR SHADOW AND KEROANNE1. **IF YOU DO NOT REVIEW EVERY TIME I UPDATE YOU WILL NO LONGER BE A HOST!!!!!**

Shadow: And now for the comments!

_**Totochu:**_ _**RAWR! UPDATE ALREADY PLEASE ITS BEEN OVER A MONTH DARN IT! im sorry i yell a lot when im angry. JUST PLEASE UPDATE!**_

100th review :D

Twilight: Ehhhh….most of them were dares….I PROMISE NEXT CHAPTER I WILL HAVE ALL OF YOU HERE! YES THAT MEANS YOU KINKIRO


	12. Chapter 12

Keroanne1: (swinging Amy's Piko Piko hammer) I THOUGHT HE LOVED ME!!!!

Amy: Give that back you idiot!

Keroanne1: (cries hysterically)

Twilight: (shoving tissues in her ears)

Zelda: (thwacks Twilight) DO SOMETHING!

Twilight: Why me!?

Shadow: It was your fault in the first place!!!

Twilight: Keroanne1? Are you ok? (dodges knife)

Keroanne1: NO I'M NOT YOU IMBECILE!

Link: Psst, Ilia, what's an imbecile?

Ilia: I think it's a homeless guy with 3 toes

Midna: (facepalm)

Twilight: Don't worry Kero-Chan I have the perfect solution (hands her razor)

Keroanne1: (glares at Twilight) What am I going to do with this?

Twilight: Whatever you like! Ahem (scratches herself) hmmm itchy (winks) Eh? Eh?

Keroanne1: Oh I know EXACTLY what to do with it (attempts to stab Twilight)

Twilight: (runs away) TEREESA HELP ME!!!!

Zelda: Who the hell is Tereesa?

Twilight: (points to half eaten cookie) (GASP) TEREESA NO!!!!!!!!! YOUR BRAIN IS GONE!!!!

Shadow: You think…..the cookie……is alive

Twilight: Yes but not now! (holds a funeral)

Midna: You know this actually kind of smart for Twilight, remember fluffy?

Link: (shudders) How can I not forget?

Ilia: THAT WAS FRICKEN HILARIOUS

Link: NO it wasn't!

Zelda: HAH! Remember when she used him to force Link in a tutu?

Everyone: (dies laughing)

Twilight: Are you better Kero-Chan?

Keroanne1: (sniff) Yeah I think I'll be (hiccup) good

Shadow: Alrighty then ON WITH THE STORY!

Midna: Who the hell says that anymore?

Shadow: SHADDUP!

Ilia: This is a review from _**Fifie-Dauther-of-Meta-Night **_

_**OMG!HI!Okay,Midna,you can lie all you want,but everyone in America and Japan knows that you are in love with ,which generation Princess Zelda was your mother?...Oh,no wait...Twilight doesn't know about the Wind Waker and Phantom Hourglass...damn...ANYWAY...um...If Zant's there,please tell him to leave 'cause no one likes crackhead!You want people to fear you,here's a tip:DON'T START HOPPIN' AROUND THE ROOM SCREECHING LIKE A FRIGGIN' INDIAN AND BENDING YOUR SPINE LIKE SPONGEBOB!  
Okay,done going off on ,if you ever try to make a move on Link Midna and I will kill an antique ,my inspiration is gone,so I'll give you some dares when I think of them.  
Bye.  
Arigatou.  
~Fefie-Daughter-Of-Meta-Knight(yes,I'm a diehard Kirby fan. ...META KNIGHT IS SO SMEXY OMG!!)**_

Twilight: BWAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (dies laughing[I really did])

Midna: (blushes) I DON'T LIKE LINK!

Link: Then why are you blushing?

Zelda And Ilia: (getting mad)

Shadow: Mwahahah I just love romance conflicts

Keroanne1: WAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!! THEY REMIND ME OF KEVIN!!!!! (hyperventilates)

Twilight: (slaps her) HE'S NOT REAL WOMAN!

Keroanne2: (sniff) You're right. Thank you

Twilight: No thank you for letting me slap you! (giggles manically)

Shadow: Ehhh…..

Zelda: Yea too bad Twilight knows nothing about games or movies OR NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Twilight: I get mad at myself for that too. (text messages Zant)

Zant: (karate kicks the door) FEAR ME BITCHES! (slap) WAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Midna: If you want to be on overlord you can't cry

Zant: (puppy face) WHAT!?!?!?

Ilia: ANYWAY. Ahem STOP SCREECHING LIKE A FRICKEN IDIAN AND MOVING YOrU SPINE LIKE SPONGEBOB!!!!

Zant: (in a bellydancer outfit) Ohh LIiiink do you like it?

Everyone: (throws up on Midna)

Midna: OK I THOUGH WE ESTABLISHED THE IDEA OF PUKE IN YOUR OWN CORNER!!!!!

Zant: (starts bellydancing)

Midna: OMFG!!!! (runs away)

Everyone: (chases Midna full of vomit)

Midna: (in a warehouse) I think I'll be safe here

Twilight: (breaks down door)

Everyone: (vomits on Midna)

Midna: **** YOU GUYS AND ALL YOUR****** STOMACH PROBLEMS!!!!!!!

Twilight: Heheh

Shadow: Why are you laughing?

Twilight: Because she said "Apple Farts" twice!

Ilia: What do you mean "if I make a move"

Zelda: (sigh) Don't worry you'll catch on

Link: ON TO THE NEXT REVIEW!

Keroanne1: This is from _**Nakori17 **_

_**Hallo and here is my big ol' ball of insanity**_

First up is a Q for Link: what do you do in your spare time aside from fishing, ranch work and swordsmanship practice?

Next is midna's Q: Has anyone ever mistaken you for a geni and tried to put you in a bottle?

last is for Illia: how do you get your hair to stay in that hairdo of yours?!?

Now dares

Link I dare you to share an entire pizza with Twilight

Illia I dare you to give Fado a wedgie

And finally, I love this fic i give cookies to you all !

Link: The first question is easy I-

All the girl: (tackle him) SHUT UP BEFORE YOU RUIN THEIR MINDS!!!!!!

Link: (says something)

Midna: What did he say?

Link: (screams)

Shadow: I think we should get off before we damage something

Keroanne1: On second thought let's keep waiting

Link: (screams even louder)

Keroanne1: Yeah I got bored (gets off)

Link: (bent in a way that's impossible)

Twilight: Whoa! He looks like an Indian!

Ilia: Why, out of all the things you want to know, do you ask me that?

Midna: She uses toothpaste

Ilia: MIDNA!!!! (chases her)

Twilight: YAY!

Link: What?

Twilight: We get to eat a pizza! (calls pizza place) WHAT!?

Link: Something wrong?

Twilight: STUPID VERIZON! Man now I know why you don't hear the other end of the conversation in those commercials

Zelda: (sweatdrops)

Twilight: I mean seriously! Bu- it- iink- onig –unnel- (mimics static) (stares at phone) WHAT A PIECE OF SHIT!

Shadow: TWILIGHT LANGUAGE!

Keroanne1: It's the small box for you!

Twilight: NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (brings out feather)

Shadow(sweatdrop) Ok why do you have a feather?

Twilight: (whispers) Because it's DEADLY

Ilia: idiot

Fado: (walks in) (gay accent) Sorry guys whew traffic

Zelda: Psst Midna

Midna: (stuffing herself with corn) What?

Zelda: Did you invite him?

Midna: No

Shadow: So traffic got ya?

Fado: Well, like, DUH I mean it's 8 IN THE MORNING and everyone's leaving AT THE SAME DAMN TIME

Ilia: (walks behind him) Hey Faaaaddoooo

Fado: Yea baby?

Ilia: (gives him a texas wedgie) Try walking with that up your ass

Fado: O-M-G baby. Is this a new style? 'Cause I look FABULOUS!

Shadow: (kneels) When God? WHEN WILL THE WORLD MAKE SENCE?!

Link: The day Twilight becomes a wolf

Twilight: (howling)

Shadow: She already thinks she's awolf and that means the world is in MORE peril!!!

Midna: Alright! Yay! COOKIES!

Zelda: (hiss) MINE!!! (crawls in a dark corner)

Midna: Is that supposed to happen?

Keroanne1: Ehh….. I think we should continue this next review is from _**linkluver01**_

_**epona: steal links hat and run away (lets see how long it takes for him to realize its gone!)**_

link:(before you ask, yes i do get enjoyment out of torturing you.) ask zelda out again because she really likes you... (thats what he thinks! hehe), give navi back what she deserves (annoy her as much as she annoyed you in the game), and chase epona when you finally figure out that your hat is gone.

zelda: majorly reject link and pick up the randomly and conveniently placed sledge hammer and hit link in the head for once again asking you out.

ilia: why are you even here?

midna: um...heres 50 rupees, go crazy.

Twilight: DAMMIT!

Ilia: What?

Twilight: How am I supposed to contact Epona?

Link: (takes out horseweed)

Shadow: (whispers to Zelda) At least she realizes a horse doesn't own a phone

Zelda: Really? Let's see…(ahem) Hey Twilight!

Twilight: Yea?

Zelda: Why cant you contact her?

Twilight: I went over my minuets!

Shadow and Zelda: (collapse)

Epona: NEIGGGGGGGGHHH!!!!!!!!

Link: Hi girl! Are you hungry?

Epona: (stares)

Link: What are you staring at?

Epona: (hits link, steals his hat and runs)

Everyone: (laughs)

Link: GODDAMMIT! I GET BEAT UP BY MY OWN HORSE TOO!?!?!? (doesn't notice his hat is gone)

Keroanne1: You're forgetting something

Link: (re-reads review) WHAT THE -!!!!...........darn

Midna: Nice cover

Link: Yo Zelda (drags her in a corner) You wanna go out with the hottest guy ever?

Zelda: IKE!?!?! EEEEEEEEEEEPPPP!!!!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!!

Link: ???? What?

Zelda: Umm..Never mind…..(whistles)

Link: (sigh) Why me? (scratches his head) What the-? EPONA!!! GIVE ME BACK MY HAT YOU DONKEY!

Ilia: Is there really an insult for a horse?

Twilight: Beats me! All I know is when you call somebody a donkey in Arabic it's a bad insult!

Shadow: How the hell do you know this?

Twilight:……………..cuz

Zelda: Ahh yes time to do my bidding

Link: Which is?

Zelda: (picks up sledgehammer)

Link: O_O mommy…

Random Kid: (watching Dora) (static) MOMMY DORA DIED!!!!!!

Zelda: (standing with Link near a broken satellite) Ahh music to my ears

Ilia: What do you mean "Why am I even hear!?"

Midna: We needed somebody to clean up vomit

Ilia: (Attempts to murder Midna)

Midna: (gets 50 rupees) Damn. YOU CHEAPSTAKE! What the hell am I gonna do with 50 rupees?

Twilight: Nice way to say thank you

Shadow: NEXT REVIEW

Keroanne1: This is from _**The Sage of Twilight**_

_**Hey Twilight!**_

Twilight: HI!_****_

Sorry about not reviewing my damn old internet went down for a VERY LONG its better if its only 3 hosts.I'll just help you by sending dares.

To GanonDORK:  
Transform into a bunny rabbit and stay like that until Twilight says you can turn back to normal.

To Twilight:  
For the joy of it... USE BUNNY GANON AS BAIT TO FISH A RANDOM FANGIRL IN THE FANGIRL PIT AND TIE THAT FANGIRL TO LINK!MWAHAHAHAHAHHA(Just to make sure...I'm giving you this giant bazooka!SHOOT HIM IF HE EVER TRIES TO ESCAPE!!MWAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA*Coughs

HAVE A BIG GIGANTIC PIE!

~KuroiHimitsu~  
AKA RUNO

Link: All of you are on crack

Twilight: (sniffing something)

Link: I knew it

Midna: LET ME DO IT! (text messages GanonDORK)

Ganondorf: Ok how many times do I tell you STOP CALLING ME

Everyone: (snickering)

Ganondorf: (wearing barney PJ's) What?

Twilight: (brings out bazooka) TURN INTO A FLUFFY BUNNY!!!!

Ganondorf: But I thought you hated those

Twilight: ……So? DO IIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTT……………….

Ganondorf: (turns into bunny)

Ilia: Time to visit the vet!

Ganondorf: (squeak?)

Keroanne1: (pulls out needle)

Ganondorf: (SQUEAKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!) (runs to fangirls)

Fangirl: AWww!!

Link: Ganondorf come back!

Fangirl: EEEEEEEEEPPPPPP!!!! IT'S LINK!!!!!!! I WANT YOUR TIGHTS!!!

Link: Ahh Jesus (runs away)

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30 min later

Link: OH COME ON! (tied to fangirl)

Fangirl: This is just like my dream only you were naked

Link: WHAT

Shadow: YAY PIE!!! (devours everything)

Keroanne1: My God you even ate the plate

Shadow: (burp) Yup

Ilia: ANNNYYYYWWWAAAYYYYY

Midna: This review is from-

Keroanne1: (deep voice) MEEEEEEEEE

Midna: (sweatdrop) Right

_**First of all: L = awesome sugar-aholic smartypants who everyone that knows him just adores. Light = poopy-head.  
OH NOES! YOU FOUNDED OUT ABOUT KEVIN!! -sniff- He was my special fluffy pillow monkey...  
Link: For finding out about my imaginary boyfriend, I dare you to get hurt by every cruel and terrible thing that Twilight can think of. And if you don't, I WILL BE THE ONE TO CHOP YOUR FREAKING HEAD OFF, DIP!**_

Link: (Running around in circles)

Twilight: You know this is kind of fun (watches him)

Keroanne1: (brings out axe) I'M GONNA CHOP YOUR FREAKING HEAD OFF!!! OLlololololololooo

Zelda: Now that was disturbing

Shadow: What the blood on the axe

Zelda: No the creepy yell she just did

Twilight: (sneaks behind Zelda) OLOLOLOLOLOOOOLOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

Zelda: (screams and hits Twilight with a fan) OMG IM SO-! Oh wait it's just you

Twilight: (On the floor bleeding)

Keroanne1: Well now that the urge to kill Link is gone now what

Ilia: First of all what did you do to him

Link: (tied to Rianix) HELPPP!!!

Rianix: (flies away)

Link: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!

Twilight: hehe

Zelda: Next review! This is from _**Totochu **_

_**Yay! you updated!  
Ok i have some new dares:  
Link i dare you to fight Marx (this dangerously insane boss from kirby superstar that can fly, is purple, has a stupid jester hat and randomly shoop-da-whoops people) with your only weapon a giant tuna.  
Midna i dare you to video tape the above and put it on youtube  
*hits twilight on the head with king dedede's hammer* Bye now!  
I'M DANGEROUSLY INSANE!**_

Twilight: (bleeding from the head) WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!?!?!

Shadow: It said (he/she) was dangerously insane right?

Twilight: Oh really? Must have missed that

Link: (holding giant tuna) BACK DEMON!

Marx: Ok WTF why am I even here?

Link: (slaps him with the tuna)

Marx: Where the hell am I? Why is he hitting me with a tuna?

Midna: Hahahahah! (puts it on youtube) Hey guys look I already got a comment!

Everyone: (looks) (laughs)

Midna: (screaming at the computer) WELL NO ONE ASKED YOU NOOB!

Ilia: While Midna is going mentally insane-

Midna: I HEARD THAT

Ilia: This next review is from-

Twilight: My buddy! (thwack!)

Ilia: STOP INTERUPPTING ME! (ahem) This is from Kinkiro

Twilight: Oh boy

Zelda: (thwack) Be nice!

_**That one was just hilarious!!!! XD And I got even more suggestions *cue evil laugh*  
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------K- *comes back covered in soot and ashes* Woot! I came back from saving the Blind Orphans from the fire!!!!!! *holding up to 80 little kids behind***_

(Link-....you? Save children?........that's just scary....*starts walking back*)

K- Did I mention that I trained them to control killer Hollow puppets and to shoot snipers? *points at them again with giant Hollow puppets and giant guns* And they are usually 99.999999% accurate! ^^ *innocent grin* Guess who's their target parctice today?

(L- *pales* oh-sh-)

K- Fire at the man in a dress!!!!

*little children start shooting and chasing Hollow puppets after Link; gives contracts to Twilight and Midna* You guys now have rights to join them in your armies. They also are great for assassination missions. Now let's see...*brings out giant list*

-I need to send Link to the Bermuda Triangle with Iron boots to sink into the ocean.....  
-Give Midna a trip package to the newest Nickleback or Linkin Park (of their choice) concert with Twilight (me got backstage passes! XD),......  
-Send Zelda to fight every boss and mini boss in Twilight Princess all in a pit of angry killer cuccoos.....  
-teleport Zant to every kiddie show that Twilight can think of to torture him for 5 hours, as well of choice of insane people....  
-Roast Ganondork over a fire in his piggie form to test it out with Link to see if it's poisoned; if it is, he has to finish it all up, and if not, use it as a snack for Rianix and Fred......  
-and finally.....make Link insult the goddesses again, and this time try, cuz he only made them a little angry, and I put an emphasis on EXTREMELY ANGRY!!!!!! *insert demonic voice here* OR SO HELP ME GET MY NAVI MAKER 3000, AND CREATE 3000 ALL IN YOUR TINY NUTSHELL CALLED A HEAD, OVER CAFFINATED AND OVER-PIXIE SUGARED, AND RIGGED TO EXPLODE!!!!!!! THEN SEND YOU ALIVE INTO A LOCKED ROOM WITH NO WAY OUT WITH QUADRUPLE THE AMOUNT OF DARK/SHADOW LINKS TO KILL YOU AND BRING YOU BACK TO LIFE OVER AND OVER!!!!!!!

(Link- *hides behind couch*)

K-...NOW OBSERVE THE POWER OF 10 EXPLOSIVE NAVIS!!!!!! *lauches 10 atomic navis to random places across the room and destroys it to oblivion, as well as Link and the couch* *has Midna and Twilight in special anti-explosive sheild* Now allow the orphan to repair and recreate the studio while I train deaf orphans to go into field of battle and radiation. You're allowed to revive anyone anyways! And you two still rock!!! *runs off*

5 min later...

*Orphans fully repair and recreate mansion/studio, with twice the size and 10 couches nearly indestrucatble and comfy as pillows*

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And that's all I got for now! XD

Midna and Twilight: WOOT!!!!!!!!!! We love you!

Link: (whispers) I sure as hell don't

Midna: What was that!?! (send the little orphans after him)

Link: Why do you want me to go to the Bermuda triangle?

Kenkiro: Just because! (shoves him in the water)

Link: (sees Sonic swimming) Now I know the world has ended

Zelda: AHHH!!!!!!!!!! (running away from Diababa)

Ilia: HAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shadow: Where IS Zant?

Keroanne1: I don't know, he can be in hell for all I care.

Zant: Are the poopy monsters gone?

Everyone: (sigh)

Ilia: (shoves him in a "kiddie" chamber)

Zant: SQUEALL!!!!!!!!!!! You got my boyfriend here!

Midna: WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIITTTTTT!!!!!!!!!(runs to Mexico) CLEAR!

Everyone: (barfs)

Midna: (comes back) guys look what I found! (holds ancient Egyptian artifact)

Link: O_O Midna? That's not for Egypt

Midna: Whose it for then?

Goddess: WHOSE THE ***** THAT TOOK MY BOW

Midna: (throws it at Link)

Goddess: (sees Link) YOU ****** AND *** WITH **** (zap him and sends him flying to Kenkiro)

Link: Oh My Lord

Kenkiro: Mweheheheeh!!!! (drags him away)

Link: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP RAPE!

Everyone: O_O

Zelda: (ahem) Well, this review is from _**juju**_

_**Question for twilight:**_

Why don't you just slap a collar on link and make him midna's ** for a while that'll get laughs/

Midna: Sorry. He just said he was being raped at the moment

Shadow: Okkkkkkkkk The next review is from _**Micheiru Berujironu **_

_**Here we go.**_

Midna: Drag Link into the closet and... well... XD  
Zelda: Grab a chainsaw and go on a murderous rampage.  
Ilia: Anytime you see a fairy, kill it.

That is all. Sorry.

Midna: DIDN'T I JUST SAY IS BEING RAPED!?

Zelda: (chainsaw magically appears) MWAHAHAHH!!!!!! HEY MARIO COME HERE!!!

Mario: Oh-a no!

Ilia: WHAT!? After Navi left us I get this review? MAN!

Shadow: This last review is from (Drum roll) MEEEEE!!!!!!!!!

_**Ahahahaha! Yeah, its me Shadow. :D Great chapter, I shot a machine gone randomly! WHO! Hey...didn't we PM a bunch of times and I shot a machine gun? I can't remember...  
We should do it again if we didn't!! You are fun to talk to! :3**_

Twilight: Heyyyy

Shadow: What

Twilight: I like talking to you to :D

Link: (All the way back from……hmm) (panting)

Zelda: Oh look a girl finally said yes

Twilight: Hey look Nemo!

Everyone: Where?

Twilight: Hehe I don't know

Midna: (sweatdrops) She's a keeper


	13. Chapter 13

Twilight: (watching a scary movie) Don't open the closet, Don't open the closet! DON'T OPEN THE CLOSEEEETTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Keroanne1: (slaps her) Shut up!

TV: (screaming)

Twilight: You see what happens when you don't listen to Twilight?

Shadow: (sigh)

Ilia: Guys we're on

Twilight: (shoves T.V out of the way) (distant crash)

Zelda: Hello!

Link: ……………….

Midna: Psst….. say something dip wad

Link: (not enthusiastically) We are here today because-

Twilight: IT'S ALMOST OUR 1 YEAR ANNIVERSERY!

Everyone: YAY!!!!

Keroanne1: Everyone who says they want to be in the story on March 30th will be in here!

Shadow: We won't be taking reviews this chapter and the next chapter Zelda crew takes a day off!

Zelda Crew: YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Keroanne1: Now let's go on to this chapters reviews

Link: DANG IT!

Twilight: ARE YOU DEFYING ME!?!?! IT'S THE THERAPY CLOSET FOR YOU!

Link: What's a therapy closet?

Shadow: (shoves him) This is the therapy closet

Some guy that looks like Einstein: (with his accent) Good now let's see what is going on in your brain

Link: (pulls out master sword) LEAVE ME ALONE YOU FREAK!!!!

Guy: I'm not a freak!

Link: Dude you're dressed up and Einstein and trying to talk like him!

Guy: So?

Link: You're in high school (pause) Are you a loner?

Ilia: Hehehe

Midna: That guy is pathetic

Shadow: ON WITH THE-

Midna: Don't even say it

Zelda: This review is from _**CrimsonDarkness **_

Twilight: a.k.a KINKIRO!

_**LOL! XD BUAHAHAHAHAHA! Brilliant! BRILLIANT! But I will send me suggstions through PM because they are very long and tortureous *points at Link* And I'm going to enjoy every bit..and NO RAPE! I HATE GUYS! WHY ELSE DO YOU THINK I TORTURE THEM?!??!?! *launches sniper rifle filled with atomic, over-caffinated, over-pixie sugared Navis, with high pitched frequency; 5 in each present male's head, rigged to explode on your command* Note, I will return!...Hopefully in the same chapter! XD**_

Everyone: WHAT THE HELL

Twilight: Kinkiro are you high?

Shadow: What do you think?

Keroanne1: T his NEXT review is from _**MidnalovesLinktotheendoftime**_

Midna: I DO NOT!

_**LMAO Midna is good. And aw she doesn't sound like Elivis. That sad...lol. POOR LINK GETS BEATEN WITH A BASEBALL BAT! No she loved him (duh my username states this with lyrics from Stuck On You by Paramore) And lol I've played OOT and MM when I was younger but TP's the only thing I BEAT in the LOZ series. Lol 5th grade teacher.  
LMAO MIDNA THAT WAS EVIL!**_

Ilia: Is she referring to chapter 3?

Link: Yup……(thinking) Stupid reviewers

Midna: Twilight! How come you won't let me sound like Elvis?

_**  
**_Twilight: (annoying giggle) I don't know!

Zelda: Ok this is the next REAL review……I hope

Midna: It's from ……_**MidnalovesLinktotheendoftime **_(thinking) Ugh I do not

Link: Again?

Ilia: This isn't a review is it?

Keroanne1: Let's hope

_**Lmao you are evil! And YAY MIDNA! (hugs Midna, TP Link, and Zelda) Screw Illia. SHOOT HER SHOOT HER!  
I must read more before I ask!**_

Ilia: ??????????????????

Twilight: (snickers)

Ilia: (hits her with an anvil) Shut up Baka

Shadow: She used a Japanese word!

Twilight: (scratches head) Up?

Shadow: (sigh)

Zelda: You know this reviewer does seem kind of smart right, Link?

Link: How the hell should I know? They all seem as dumb as crap

Reviewers: (lip tremble) (bawls) WAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LINK NO LOVE US!!!

Link: (hears crying and looks around) ……………I'm gonna say 1 word. Twilight?

Keroanne1: Yup

Twilight: (hops on her back) KE-RO-CHAN!

Keroanne1: (having breathing problems) Whhaa….tt?

Twilight: Why is your user name Keroanne1? Is there a Keroanne2?

Keroanne1: (smiles) Twilight

Twilight: Yes?

Keroanne1: (still smiling) Stop talking before you get hurt

Midna: This is the NEX REAL REVIEW

Everyone: WE HOPE

Twilight: This is from _**xXRemantofChaosXx**_

_**Dares for the gang:  
Link: Dress up as Zelda, go on a date with a deranged Zelda Fanboy, and let him get to second base. (Dark: Are you trying to mentally scar me?! He's my light half!)  
Midna: Spend seven minutes in a closet with Zant and a chainsaw!  
Zelda: Spend ten minutes in a closet with the aforementioned deranged Zelda Fanboy and a flamethrower.  
Ilia: ...Go on a sugar rush.  
Twilight: Stop stealing Ganondork! I'm trying to hold him for a ransom of ten pounds of lime starbursts! I'll share, but I won't ever get my ransom if he's running off every five freaking minutes! Also, help me take over the Moon before my chinese neighbor does! The moon belong to me, Kai... and Twilight!**_

Twilight: Yay! I knew being half wolf would do me some good (howls to [now her own] moon)

Ilia: (facepalm)

Link: Dark is right. ARE YOU TRYING TO MENTALLY SCAR ME!?!?!?!

Zelda: (giggle) Liiiiiiink if you do it I'll give you it.

Link: O_O really?

Zelda: (sexy nod)

Link: I'll do it (does said things)

Midna: When you said "Give you it" what did you mean?

Zelda: (looks around)

Ilia: O_O You don't mean (points down)

Zelda: NO YOU IDIOT!

Shadow: Then what did you mean?

Link: (burst through the door panting) HE TRIED TO RAPE ME!!!

Zelda: Yay! I knew that was going to happen

Link: Alright give me it

Zelda: (takes him in a closet)

Link: THANK YOU FINALLY!

Everyone: O_o

Midna: I wonder

Link and Zelda: (walks out all happy)

Keroanne1: What did you do

Zelda: (holds flamethrower)

Shadow: OOOHHH! The review!

Midna: Hehe (holds chainsaw) I had fun too

Ilia: WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (runs back and forth)

Twilight: (trying to hit her with a hammer) STOP. YOU. DAMN. IDIOT!

Link: Next review! This is from-

Keroanne1: (shoves him) MEE!!!!!!!!!!!

_**I'm too lazy to log in right now... soory.**_

I want to get Link a cool outfit for no reason... den buwn id in hish fash! BWA HA HA HA HA!  
Can we have a party? I wanna cookie... -_-

I also vote that we play Super Smash Bros. Brawl!! Pleasee? I give you chip!

Well, I'd like to smash Navi again. C'mere, you annoyin' piece of bleep...

Twilight: Aww! Anything for you!

Keroanne1: Really!?

Twilight: But we do it NEXT chapter on the anniversary!

Keroanne1: (collapses) ok…

Shadow: This next review is from _**linkluvr01 **_

_**hahaha! this story always makes me lol! heres more dares.**_

midna: tell link off because he is trying to hook you up with zant. (yuck!) btw, you can do a lot with 50 rupees! would you rather get nothing? there are starving children and you are complaining that 50 rupees is cheap??! i cant believe you people! so selfish!

link: run from midna and run into zelda and knock her over.

zelda: when link runs into you, apologize to link because you feel bad that you treated him that way when he tried to ask you out. then tell him how you really feel about him.

thats all i got for now!

Midna: We are the most famous story in all of fairytale land and we can make WAY more money then 50 FRICKEN RUPEES! (slap) HEY!

Ilia: Be nice!

Midna: LINK YOU (censored) SON OF A (censored)!!! I OUGHTA KICK YOUR (censored) (censored). AND WHILE YOU'RE TRYING TO WALK WITH THAT UP YOUR (censored) YOU CAN GO KISS THAT (censored) (censored) (censored) ZANT! I MEAN WHAT THE (cccccccceeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnsssssssssssssoooooooorrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeddddddddd)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone: O-o (backs away)

Midna: (smiling) That felt good….

Link: (runs away and crashes into Zelda) (covers face) SORRY ZELDA!

Zelda: It's ok Link I'm the one who should be sorry…..

Link: What why?

Twilight: And now for the sappy romance!

_They walk out of the noisy studio into the quite of the night. Link looks at Zelda face and give her hand an affectionate squeeze. Zelda smiled at the boy in front of her._

"_Link, I'm sorry for all those nasty words I said about you. You see the truth is that I…I….l-love you" _** (THERE YOU GO ZELINK FANS) **_Link smiled and hugged her while mumbling into her hair those same exact words. They held onto each other forever never wanting to part…….Until Twilight just had to type something stupid and ruin it all._

"_Link, I'm sorry I don't love you" Zelda said letting go of him. The green clad looked at her confused._

"_What?" He said_

"_The truth is I'm in love with Dark Link!" Link collapsed_

"_WHAT!?" Zelda looked at him with chibi eyes_

"_He's such a bad-ass sexy player!" _

Everyone except Zelda and Link: BWAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (dies laughing)

Zelda: I can't believe she made me say that!

Keroanne1: She's Twilight what are you gonna do?

Twilight: Hehehe (playing with glue) GLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUE! GLUUUUUUUUUUUUE!!!!!!!!!!!

Ilia: (facepalm)

Shadow: OOH OOH! MY TURN! This review is from me!

_**Haha!! Great chapter! :3**_

*Hands Twilight chocolate bar* Have fun with that! Anyway, we should start PMing again, that was so fun!

Link: Hey Twilight can I have some-

Twilight: (devours everything, wrapper and all)

Link: O_O

Twilight: You're right! We should start PMing!

Shadow: YAY!

Ilia: This is our last review of the day! It's from _**Nakori17**_

_**Hm toothpaste...who knew...**_

anyway, more from me!

To link, Would it be ok if i glomp ,AkA Super hug, you?

Can i push Zant into a pit of flesh eating scarab beetels?

Twilight...What do you think of Tacos?

Link: NO YOU MAY NOT

Keroanne1: Too late (opens door to reveal Nakori)

Nakori: (glomps him) I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!

Link: (flesh is burning) HELP!!!!!!!!! It's buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrnnnnnnnnnnnsssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Twilight: **NOW REMEMBER! THE DEAD LINE IS THE 30****TH****!!!! I WILL CHOOSE 4 PEOPLE TO REPLACE THE ZELDA CREW FOR A FUN CHAPTER! YOU GOTTA BE QUICK! AND WHEN YOU REVIEW TO BE IN THE STORY TELL ME THE NAME YOU WANT ME TO USE!!! BYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!**

**Shadow and Keroanne1 you're already in the story so don't bother say ME! I WANNA BE IN! Ok? **

**(falls asleep with a frozen chicken) **


	14. Chapter 14

Twilight: HI!!!!!

Kero-chan: WELCOME TO THE 1 YEAR ANIVERSERY!

Shadow: And here are our lucky contestants!

**ZeldaObsessesd!(nickname: Kaimai) xXRemnantofChaosXx! (nickname: Aaron) and CrimsonDarkness! (a.k.a Kenkiro) **

Twilight: And since I didn't find 4 good hosts I will make up one please welcome COOKIE! (shows anime style blond 6-year-old)

Cookie: HI!

Twilight: ARE YOU READY TO PARTY!

Kaimai: Yeah!

Aaron: This will be cool!

Kenkiro: WHOO HOO!

Cookie: WE'RE GONNA DIEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone: (Stares at Cookie)

Cookie: What? Wasn't I supposed to say that?

Everyone: (shakes head)

Shadow: Let's play SSBB!

Kero-chan: (glomps Twilight) I KNEW YOU WOULD FORGET!

Twilight: GET HER OFF!!! It bbbbbbbuuuuuuuurrrrrnnnnnnnnnssssssss

Cookie: (uses fire extinguisher)

Kenkiro: Why did you do that?

Cookie: She said she was burning

Aaron: Yup we're gonna have fun

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**1 hour later**

Everyone: HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!?!?!?!

Cookie: Hehe

Shadow: We lost……..to a six year old

Kaimai: Twilight did you teach her?

Twilight: Yes. It was either that or tuba

Cookie: (shudders)

Kero-chan: I know let's watch a scary movie!

Cookie: I don't know……

Twilight: It's okay I'm sure it's not that scary

Cookie and Twilight: (clinging to each other) Don't go in the house Don't go in the house DON'T GO IN THE HOUSE!!!!!................AHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (runs out of the house)

Shadow: (sigh) I'll get them (goes out) (indistinctive yelling)(car alarm) (gunshots) (light pole falling) (brick flies through window) (Cookie screaming for Bob)

Everyone: O_o Who's Bob?

Aaron: Why did a brick fly through the window?

Kenkiro: Because this is Twilight's studio. (giggle) I STILL CANT BELIEVE IT!!

Kaimai: Wow you don't get out much do you?

Kenkiro: (maniacal face) WHAT DO YO MEAN!?!?!? (eye twitch)

Aaron and Kaimai: (nervous laugh)

Cookie and Twilight: WE'RE BAAAAAAAACK!

Everyone: (non-enthusiastically) Yay…..

Shadow: (Sigh) Twilight? Cookie?

Both: Yes?

Everyone: (nods head)

Shadow: We have to take you to the doctor

Cookie: For a checkup!

Kero-chan: Uhh sure….

Aaron: (Takes them to mental hospital) (thinking) Why do I have to take them?

Cookie: (playing with the blocks)

Twilight: (staring at display fish) (gasp) COOKIE LOOK NEMO!

Cookie: Really!? Where?! (shoves Twilight) NEMO!!!!!!!

Aaron: Guys that fish is blue

Both: (pause) DORY!!!!!!!

Aaron:…………….

Boy: (runny nose) Hi! (sssssnnnnnnniiiiiiiiiiffffffff) Wanna play?

Both: SURE!

Aaron: (hold doctor mask, gloves and disinfectant spray) HISSSSSSSSS BACK AWAY!!!! (sprays the kids eyes)

Boy: AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!! (runs away and into a wall)

Nurse: The doctor will see Cookie and Twilight now

Both: YAY!!

Aaron: (thinking) Why couldn't Kaimai do this?

Doctor: (stares at Cookie) Hi there what's your name?

Cookie: Cookie!

Doctor: O_O no, what's your NAME

Cookie: Coo-kie

Doctor: I'll give you a cookie after you tell me your-

Aaron: HER NAME IS FRICKEN COOKIE!

Doctor: Oh…….Well (ahem) (points at Twilight) Do you live with her?

Cookie: Yup!

Doctor: Do you have a mom?

Cookie: Yeah! (points at Aaron)

Aaron: HEY!

Doctor: Uhh hmm… what's your hobby?

Twilight: When I had my memory she told me we had a lot of fun running from the police!

Doctor: O_o

Aaron: (coughs)

Doctor: You knew about that?

Aaron: Well I read the story so……

Doctor: Ok well I have a diagnosis

Aaron: Really?

Doctor: Yes. You will need to see me 2 a week for mental therapy

Aaron: WHAT!?!!? ARE YOU DUMB IN THE NOODLE!?

Doctor: Hmm. Make that 3 times a week

Aaron: (takes a deep breath)

Cookie and Twilight: WAAIIIT!!!!!! (puts hands over ears) OK!

Aaron: (yells all curses known to man [and 7 known to monkeys] at the doctor)

Doctor: (mouth hanging open)

Aaron: (drives back to the studio) (sits in on the couch grouchy)

Kaimai: Did it go well?

Aaron: (stares at Kaimai) next time YOU take them

Shadow: O…..k then

Cookie: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone: WHAT!? WHAT HAPPENED!?

Cookie: NEMO DIED!!!

Aaron: You took the fish with you……

Cookie: (sniff)……..

Kero-chan: (stares) That fish is blue

Cookie: DDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!

Kenkiro: --__--"

Twilight: The doctor also said that Aaron had to visit him 3 times a week!

Everyone: (busts out laughing)

Kaimai: (sees a ladybug) Ooh…. (puts in on finger) You're pretty (ladybug flies away) IT WAS A COMPLIMENT!

Kenkiro: I think I'm surrounded by idiots

Kero-chan: You calling me an idiot?

Kenkiro: Maybe (gets hit with a shovel)

Kero-chan: Baka-ero

Twilight: Kero-chan you remember what the doctor prescribed you!

Kero-chan: (sigh) (sits in a corner with dark aura surrounding her)

Shadow: Twilight what did the doctor prescribe her?

Twilight: Beats me she killed him before I could ask!

Shadow: O_O

Cookie: (tugs on Kenkiro's sleeve) Can you drive me somewhere?

Kenkiro: Aww sure where?

Cookie: Just get in

Kenkiro: (hops in car) Where too?

Cookie: (hops in her lap and stomps on gas)

Kenkiro: HEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kaimai: (hears car screeching) OMG WHAT HAPPENED!?

Kenkiro: She drove me (twitches)

Twilight: Tsk tsk. You should have read her manual (hands her 2,000 pound manual)

Kekiro: This all just says don't feed her coffee

Kero-chan: O_O (backs away nervous)

Shadow: Kero-chan?

Kero-chan: Yes?

Shadow: Did you give her coffee?

Kero-chan: How come when something goes wrong you always blame me?

Shadow: Did you?

Kero-chan: Yes.

Kaimai: (hits her with a bat) BAKA! You could've killed her!

Kenkiro: (smiles)

Kaimai: She's just a small 6-year-old!

Kenkiro: --__--"

Aaron: guys the police are here

Twilight: BLAST!

Shadow: (shakes Twilight) WHAT DID YOU DO!?!?!?!

Twilight: I STOLE ALL THEIR PENS!!!

Everyone: ???????????????????????????

Aaron: Oh false alarm it's not the cops

Twilight: WHAT!? YOU MADE ME BLURT OUT ME SECRET FOR NO REASON!?!?!? (blows whistle)

Kero-chan: RUN!!!!!!!!!! (Rianix comes)

Rianix: (roars)

Aaron: (gulp) I-I mean i-I was t-the ice-cream guy

Rianix and Twilight: (run outside) ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!

Rianix: I want chocolate!

Twilight: Me too!

Rianix and Twilight: YOU UNDERSTAND ME SO MUCH! (hugs each other)

Cookie: Aww! What a cute little puppy! (stares) Guys?

Everyone: What?

Cookie: Where do babies come from?

Everyone: (shoves Kaimai in front)

Kaimai: WHAT!? ME!? (stares at Cookie) Oh uh well…..You see

Twilight: Boys have a carrot and girls have a rabbits mouth! The carrot goes in the rabbits mouth to eat then she poops out seeds which then grow up into other baby carrots!

Cookie: And meat will rule all!

Everyone: (twitches)

Shadow: What kind of a sick way did you explain it!?

Kero-chan: That's Twilight for you

Twilight: Everyone gather around! We need to exchange gifts!

Everyone: WHOO HOO!

Twilight: I'll give mine first. This is for you Rianix! (hands him plump cow)

Rianix: (roars thanks)

Twilight: This is for you Kero-chan! (hands her high-speed connection laptop with all the anime downloaded)

Kero-chan: AWSOME!

Twilight: Shadow I got you this! (hands her 62 inch plasma screen TV with high definition)

Twilight: Kaimai I don't know you well so since your username is ZeldaObsessed I got you this! (all Zelda games)

Twilight: Aaron, you left me some hints you I got you this! (gives Aaron Dark Links clothes)

Aaron: WOW! Wait how did you get this?

Twilight: Resources. ANYWAY! Kenkiro this is for you! (hands her all government weapons) I also used a cloning machine to have some for myself!

Kenkiro: OMG! YES MORE TOYS!!!

Twilight: And lastly this is for you Cookie! (gives her the deed to Six Flags) '

Cookie: AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU'RE SO AWSOME!!!!!

Twilight: I hope you all liked you gifts now time for cake! (shoves cake in the nearest persons mouth) CAKE WAR!

Shadow: What kind of cake is it?

Rianix: Chocolate

Shadow: AWSOME!!!

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**3 hours later**

Twilight: HAHA!

Cookie: That was fun!

Rianix: Everyone! On my back! This is our last farewell!

Everyone: (gets on Rianix and flies away)

Twilight: You guys can review now!

Everyone: HAPPY ANNIVERSERY!!!!!!!!!!!


	15. Chapter 15

Twilight: (running around in circles)

Keroanne1: Is she okay?

Shadow: (sigh) She was watching anime again

Keroanne1: (suddenly interested) Which one!?

Twilight: Elfen Lied!

Link: THAT one? Out of all of them you choose THAT

Twilight: What?

Midna: It's depressing as hell!

Zelda: Not to mention creepy

Ilia: Who enjoys watching people get their head torn off!?!?!?

Twilight and Keroanne1: WE DO!

Shadow: That's expected

Zelda: I'm a little bit disappointed

Link: Why so?

Keroanne1: Most of these dares are just rambling nonsense

Twilight: (gasp) Really?

Midna: Yeah why?

Twilight: (fires up a chainsaw)

Ilia: (sweatdrop) Now, now. No need for anything like that

Twilight: (serious face) Right! (gets a team of vicious dogs)

Zelda: (bangs her head on a pole)

Shadow: (tries to hold her back) WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!?!?!?!?

Zelda: If I lose my memory maybe all will be well

Everyone: (thinks)

Twilight: (whispers) Keroanne1 what are we doing?

Keroanne1: Focusing

Twilight: On?

Keroanne1: ……………..Focus on the thought of Links nightgown

Twilight: Pbbhhhhtttt………

Link: What are you guys laughing at?

Keroanne1: PPBBHHHHTT!!!.....

Zelda: (bangs head once again)

Shadow: How about we just read the reviews?

Twilight: Pbbhhttt…

Midna: (shakes head)

Keroanne1: It's from me!

_**YAY!! Happy anniversery! Or however you spell it!**_

Thanks for the awesomeness laptop! Have a cyber cake. And... don't worry. It's not poisoned.

:3

Zelda cast: (devours cake)

Keroanne1: It's a cyber cake

Midna: So?

Shadow: How did you eat it?

Zelda: (burps up a mouse)

Hosts: (stares at it dumbly)

Shadow: This next review is from _**ZeldaObsessed! **_

_**LOL! Thanks for putting me in! too bad i cant have all the Zelda games for real... that would be awesome! *mutters* stupid tiny allowance. oh, by the way,i Love the nickname you gave me! Wait! does this mean the A. T. Z. C is over?!?!?! NOES!**_

Twilight: A. T. Z. C. IS OVER!!!!?!?!?!? (sulks in an emo corner)

Link: Since when did she have an emo corner?

Ilia: SINCE THE BEGINNING OF TIME…..

Everyone: (stares)

Twilight: Yeah um… this is from my little apprentice _**narutofan12345678! **_

_**hey twilight! i just wanna say your story ROX! i have 2 questions, 1 for u and 1 for link.  
1st question is: can i PLEASE be in the story? i dont care if im a host or a person you can torture, just as long as im in it. I would do ANYTHING to get in it.  
ok, question 2 is for link. does midna annoy you in your wolf form?  
oh ya, i have a dare. since link is my fav character, it benifits you. i dare zelda, llia, and midna to wash epona. the catch? no clothes. seriously. not even the skins on your back. and link CAN, no HAS to watch, and you cant do anything to stop him. actually, he has to wash it with you, same thing naked, bare naked. link, you better thank me. a LOT. and you all have to stay naked for the rest of the chappie. link feel free to, ahem, "play" with them. mwa ha ha ha HA HA HA HA HA!  
luv ur story twilight. its really funny.**_

Everyone even readers: EHHHHH!!!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!? (faints)

Twilight: (slaps everyone awake)

Link: That's just too much!

Keroanne1: Really that is too much

Twilight: But we CAN do somethings

Everyone: 0_o

Link: (stripped down to his underwear)

Zelda cast: (In bikinis)

Hosts: (also in a swimsuit)

Keroanne1: WHAT THE HELL!!

Shadow: (stands un comfortable)

Twilight: WHO HOO!!! (thwack)

Shadow: Hmph (snaps her fingers and everything goes back to normal

Twilight: (hisses) You ruined my fun!

Zelda cast: (praying Thanks to God)

Twilight: Well!

Keroanne1: This is from _**ElementUchihaMaster **_

_**happy anniversary! (spelling?)**_

Twilight: HAPPY ANNIVERSAR- OW!!!!

Shadow: onanokowa (means "girl" in Japanese)

Twilight: Hai?

Midna: BAKA-ERO

Twilight: IEAA!!!!!!!!!!!! (means "no")

Link: Wait! Since when can we speak Japanese!!?!?

Twilight: Ookami genki des! (I like wolves)

Zelda: I think we should stop

Twilight: IEA!!!!

Ilia: For the rest of this chapter there will be Japanese terms

Midna: And there is a dictionary at the bottom for those who need it

Zelda: Shadow would you do the honors?

Shadow: Wakkata. This is from _**Kina Kalamari**_

_**(sigh) I guess I did get in too late...Anyway, interesting chapter, but I honestly thought they were funnier with Link, Zelda, etc. in them. So, can't wait for next chapter.**_

Link: Well DUH

Zelda: That's not nice :(

Twilight: I'll fix it! (let's go of pitbull)

Link: KWUAIYO! KWUAIYO!

Midna: Hehe

Ilia: What's so funny?

Midna: He's panicking on how we can speak Japanese but he's doing it himself

Ilia: Bakamanodomo

_**Kenkiro**_

_**SWET! XD YAY GOV'T WEAPONS I HAVE NO USE FOR EXCEPT THE ATOMIC MICROWAVE BECAUSE OF THE ULTIMATE ABILITIES OF AUTHOR POWERS! XD I don't mind getting hit by the shovel, but I wish I could've talked to Rianix T_T oh well :D Happy Anniversary, and thank you for putting me in this chapter! I cannot wait to inflict more pain on Link in the future chapters XD I wouldn't mind if you read and review my fanfiction of Bloodstained Dusk though ^^**_

I'm going to have me request from me last review for next chapter right? PLZ! :D Oh, and aftermath of chocolate cake war

Out in Asia/Japan...

BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! FEAR ME FOR I AM THE CRIMSON DARKNESS! RULER OF ASIA AND JAPAN AND ALL OF ITS FINAL FANTASY, KINGDAOM HEARTS AND LEGEND OF ZELDA GAMES! *destroying everything but the ramen sops, mangas, and video game companies and houses related to them while playing Spirit Tracks for the DS*

PS- NEVER GIVE ME CHOCOLATE OR CAKE, OR BOTH, UNLESS YOU WANT ME TO DESTROY THE EARTH FOREVER XD ME SUGAR SENSITIVE! *gets a piece of cake and ends up like Hammy from Over the Hedge going so fast, its making the world slow down*

Shadow: Hmm Interesting

Everyone: (asleep)

Shadow: This is so not my day…..

Twilight: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KWUAIYO!!! (hides)

Keroanne1: I think she had a nightmare

Shadow: (sigh) Wolfie-chan?

Twilight: (sniff) Hai?

Shadow: (hits her with a mallet) BAKA!

Twilight: EETEEAY!!!

Link: Oooookkkkaaaaayyyyyyyy

Zelda: This looks like a special Japanese chapter

Ilia: I wonder why

Twilight: (watching Elfen Lied) DAISKEYO!!!!

Everyone: (sweatdrops)

Ilia: This is from _**xXPrincess-of-RaNdOmNeSsXx**_

_**'is currently wearing Dark's clothes' Yayz! Thanx for inviting me. By the way, I'm a girl and am currently on my OTHER account. I love me some chocolate cake.**_

Hey, can me and Dark come help you host this story? I'll give you a lifetime supply of chocolate.

UPDATE OR FEAR THE WRATH OF MAH FISH! ~ Kai

Keroanne1: Wolfie-chan?

Twilight: Hai?

Keroanne1: How come everyone is now writing really retarted things just to make you laugh when you really aren't?

Twilight: How the hell should I know? I lost my memory right?

Link: Oh yeaaaah

Zelda: I like Wolfie-chan better when she's like this

Everyone: (stares)

Twilight: (chocking on chocolate milk) IEAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_**Nakori17**_

_**^_^ awsome, hm... a question...hm must think of a good one...**_

Link do you ever wash your hair?

Link: NANI!?!?!?!?!?!

Everyone: BWAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Link: OF COURSE I DO!

Midna: Iea

Link: HAI!

Midna: IEA!

Shadow: OOROOSEH!!!! (fires up a chainsaw)

Twilight: Shadow-chan! (giggle) Your face is red again!

_**IcefyrBlizzard.**_

_**Why is the master sword purple? why not white? Or green?  
Plus Twilight i give you my Shiny gem of hypnotism, just hold it in the light nad chant "pretty pretty, shiny shiny" and instruct them on what to do *gives gem" My cat used on me so i took it away.  
He's at my back with a shotgun so could I borrow ur dragon  
Please i'm scared...**_

Twilight: HAI! (hands Rianix) Have him back by tomorrow!

Keroanne1: (sulking)

Ilia: Doshiteh?

Keroanne1: All this time I could have rented Rianix

Link: AHHH!!!!! THE MASTER SWORD IS PURPLE!

Zelda: I think it's infected

Everyone: (stares) Nani?

Zelda: Well yeah I mean everything turns into a weird color when it's sick

Everyone: (collapses)

Twilight: Well that's it for today!

Everyone: SAYONARA!!!

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**Translations**

**HAI= yes**

**IEA= no**

**Onnanokowa **_**(oh-nah-no-ko-wah)**_**= girl**

**Baka-ero **_**(bah-kah-eh-roh)**_** = dumbass**

**Baka **_**(bah-kah)**_** = fool/idiot**

**Ookami genki des (**_**oo-kah-mee/ gen-key/ des)**_**= I like wolves**

**Wakkata (**_**Wah-kat-ah)**_**= understood/ I understand**

**Bakamanodomo (**_**bah-kah-mah-no-doh-moh) **_**= (not really sure, but it has something to do with a major idiot)**

**Kwuaiyo **_**(koo-aye-yoh)**_**= Scary**

**Eeteeay **_**(ee-tee-eh)=**_** it hurts**

**Daiskeyo **_**(dais-key-yoh)**_**= I love you/ I'll love you forever**

**Nani **_**(nah-nee**_**)= what**

**Oorooseh **_**(oo-roo-seh)**_** = shut up**

**Doshiteh **_**(dough- shteh**_**)= what's the matter?**

**Sayonara **_**(sah-yoh-nah-rah**_**)= goodbye!**


	16. Chapter 16

Twilight: (hyperventilating)

Link: Umm Twilight are you o-

Twilight: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!! (cries hysterically)

Shadow: You see Keroanne1? This is what happens when you watch too much anime

Keroanne1: (also crying)

Zelda: Which one did you watch?

Twilight: (sniff) Well it was recommended by Kenkiro

Midna: That explains everything

Ilia: Um I'm really bored

Twilight: (Thwacks her) NO ONE CARES!!!

Shadow: O_O ok calm down. Which one did you watch?

Keroanne1: HIGURASHI NO NAKU KORO NI!!

Link: English?

Twilight: WHEN THE CICADAS CRY!!!

Zelda: Why cant you watch anything normal?

Ilia: You're not normal either Zelda, remember the princess channel?

Zelda: SHUT UP!

Link: (shudders) Don't EVER make me watch that again!

Zelda: Lighten up! It wasn't that bad!

Midna: You forced him to have sex with you

Everyone: O_O

Shadow: Did you?

Link: She almost had me until Keroanne1 came in with Fred and broke the wall

Keroanne1: Yeah he needs to work on his skills

Twilight: (painting)

Shadow: O_o when did that get there?

Twilight: Look! I made a circle!

Ilia: (pause) that's a triangle……

Twilight: hmmm……….

Zelda: QUICK GET A REVIEW BEFORE SHE THINKS TOO DEEPLY!!!

Link: What happens if she thinks deeply?

Twilight: blood, evil, demons, sissy Link. MUST KILL ZELDA CAST

Everyone: O_o GET THE REVIEWS

Viewers: (eye twitch) What the hell is this!?

Link: This is from _**Twili-Wolfboy **_and he says ( I know it's a he because it says boy HAH!)

_**(Sweat drops anime style) Midna you are by far the most beautiful nintendo character i have ever seen... and Daiskeyo! Nothing changes that.**_

anyway i think Illia is a baka... and i have a dare for her.

Illia has to... go out with zant on a date! :D

Midna: Do I…… know you?

Wolfboy: T_T

Ilia: Pbbhht….

Twilight: Hey everyone it's the Chubacabra! QUICK HIDE THE GOATS!

Ilia: (gasp) (runs in a dark cellar)

Shadow: Is there really a chubacabra?

Keroanne1: Or did you mistake it for a coat hanger again?

Twilight: 3… 2… 1…

Ilia: (screams) GET OFF ME ZANT!

Twilight: (demented face)

Link: Next review?

Midna: Anything to get him off me T_T

Wolfboy: Oh Midna! Please marry me!

Midna: (Tiger knees him in the face)

Zelda: WOOT! Go Japanese all up on his ass!

Everyone: (stares blankly)

Zelda: What? Can I be a gangster for a few minuets?

Everyone: (shakes head slowly)

Ilia: This is next review is from-

Shadow: AHHH!!!!!!

Ilia: (drops papers all over in shock) WHAT!?

Shadow: How'd you get here!?!!?

Ilia: (evil face)

Link: Whatever you do, do not ask after that face has been shown.

Midna: This is from (gets hit with a bat)

Ilia: (ahem) This is from _**narutofan12345678 **_and he says

_**Hi! Sweet chappie. Now onto the dares.  
Midna: Heres the pencil you had in my story "the legend of zelda: the truths and the dares". Go crazy.  
Link: You ROCK! HIGH FIVE! AND YOUR TUNIC ISNT GAY! IT ROCKS!  
Zelda: You save Link this time. See how YOU like it.  
Ilia: Eh, wash epona normally for all I care. You...sorta rock. Low five.  
Twilight: Either you put me in the story, or strip in front of the zelda crew. No weaseling your way outta this one.  
Gannon: Dont really like you. So youll get tortured the most! 1st: BE TRAPPED IN A ROOM FOR 5 YEARS WITH NAVI AFTER SHE HAS DRANK 1O4350185729 ZILLION ENERGY DRINKS! 2nd: After that, shove a rabid squirrel down your underwear. 3rd: after that get Dark link to go SABBY-STABBY-RIPPY-STAB on you. Im loving this.  
Saria: Flash link (show him your...area)  
Everyone: A cookie for all of you, and a trip to Japan!**_

Twilight: (eye twitch)

Shadow: You're gonna strip?

Naruto: Maybe…. If I'm in

Keroanne1: (nods to the other hosts)

Twilight: (gives him a bear hug) WELCOME!

Naruto: Really?

Shadow: I guess….. if your not much trouble

Twilight: I'm only doing this because you made me a host in your story!

Keroanne1: (silly face)

Link: (bows to his feet) THANK YOU. FINALLY SOMEONE THINKS MY TUNIC ISNT GAY

Ilia: (picks him up) That's enough your embarrassing him

Twilight: (swings a giant hatchet around) LINK!!! MWAHAHAH!!! (demented face)

Link: OMFG!!!! (runs away) ZELDA HELP!

Zelda: (filing her nails) Ugh… but I don't wanna!

Link: GET YOU ASS OVER HERE DAMMIT!

Zelda: (sigh) finnneeee (holds up steak) Twiiilliiighhhtt (throws it in a cage)

Twilight: (drops hatchet and runs in the cage) (devours steak)

Naruto: (Pokes a stick through the cage)

Twilight: (bites it in half) MY STEAK!

Everyone: O_o

Midna: The next part says Ilia has to wash Epona

Ilia: (shudders) I'm just glad he didn't strip

Naruto: Oh come on! My stuffs pretty good! (sly grin) Wanna see?

Twilight: HELL NO! (hits him with a bat)

Keroanne1: HOW'D YOU GET HERE!?!?

Twilight: O_O umm… (tries to hide the now broken cage)

Naruto: ……….T_T that hurts………

Twilight: Narutooooooooo

Naruto: What?

Twilight: I'm too lazy to write about Ganon torture…..

Keroanne1: Next review pwease!

Shadow: Kero-chan remember what the doctor told you about not to talking like that anymore?

Keroanne1: (eye twitch)

Shadow: Umm you ok?

Keroanne1: (eats Shadow)

Everyone: O_O

Midna: WTF!?!?

Zelda: (flicks her nose) DROP IT! DROP IT! DROP IT!!!!!

Keroanne1: (barfs back Shadow)

Shadow: (is clean)

Link: The one mystery the world will never know

Zelda: (text messaging someone)

Link: Umm….

Saria: (breaks the door in) LINK!!!!!! (flashes him)

Link: YOU IDIOT!! HE MEANT SHOW ME YOUR PARTS! NOT WITH A BLINDING LIGHT!

Saria: OH!

Keroanne1: Baka….. this review is from me! (cheesy smile)

_**It's okay. I promise.**_

:D

Did you notice something, though? I'M THE 150TH REVIEW!! HOORAY!

Domo arigatou. *bows* Now let me borrow Rianix. He's AWESOME.

Twilight: What exactly do you promise?

Keroanne1: Umm that I wont eat anybody?

Everyone except Twilight: Liar….

Twilight: Here you go Kero-chan! (gives her Rianix's whistle) have him back in a week!

Rianix: Sayonara Wolfie-chan!

Twilight: Bye bye!

Link: This next review is from (stares) HAHAHAHH!!!!!!!!!

Zelda: What? (looks) HAHAH!!!

Naruto: Ok why they hell are you (looks) HAHAH!

Twilight: IT'S FROM MY MOTHER!?!?!?

Keroanne1: But you dont have a mother

Twilight: Must you all break my heart!? (bawls)

Shadow: SHAME ON YOU REVIEWER!

Midna: You brought back bad memories!

Naruto: Oh geez I'm sorry

Twilight: Just read it

_**hello dear! I was snooping onyour computer like I do every wendsday at 1PM when I saw this delightful- what was it zepda fanfiction? Anyway I wanted to try it.**_

Lark: Take of that hat it ruins your hair!  
Zepda: When you get captured by Garpinsdorf you should kick him in the teeth!  
Mifna: Take of that hideous mask, you would look so beutiful without it.  
Garpinsdorf: sit up straight and eat your vegtibles!  
Lila: You should go out with Lark, hes a really nice boy.

Goodby Twilight honey.

Twilight: ……….

Link: Umm.. ok (takes off his hat)

Zelda: ….(thinking: ZEPDA!?) Yeah sure I'll kick him….. in the teeth

Midna: (Takes off her mask and thousands of guys come) Gee thanks

Gannon: (in his room) AH! NIGHTMARE! For a second there I thought someone told me to eat vegetables

Ilia: …………… Link wanna go out?

Link: No

Ilia: Ok

Twilight:……………..

Keroanne1: It's ok we'll find the imposter!

Shadow: Here Twilight! This one is from me!

_**Sweet! I speak Japanese!!**_

...Nice!!

Great chapter!

Twilight: That's ALL you wrote?

Shadow: Umm yeah I was in a hurry.

Twilight: Domo arigato

Link: This is from…. O_O KENKIRO!!! (hides)

_**YAY! XD I enjoy being in this series! Speaking of which, yay for Elfen Lied and limb ripping! If you like that series, go for the Higurashi- When they Cry series (or the full translation of Higurashi no Naku Koro ni) cuz it boody as hell XD!**_

In fact, I want Link to be in the situation that Shion is in getting her fingernails ripped off  
XD only ALL of Link's fingernails AND toenails have to be ripped off!! Muhahahahaha! And right after, he has to be in Rika's situation when she stabs herself or in the situation of Satoko being stabbed to death by crazy Shion!! *everyone backs away from me and tries to call an asylum* ...What? If I like Elfen Lied, this is a piece of cake to handle ^^

Zelda, you are to be put in the situation of Nana when she first meets Lucy and have all your limbs torn and sliced to bits by Lucy!! ^^ Good luck with that!

Ganondorf, you're to be in place of Tipei Houjou, the abusive uncle about to be smashed into a pulp by Keichi and his borrowed metal bat for 72 hours, and no can't defend yourself or theorphan assassin will send you right into your worst, unescapeable nightmare...

Midna and Twilight...You guys still rock! but I'm running out of presents to give...hm...Well, don't forget the orphans and their awesome skills of doom! XD *gives you Fluffy on a leash (read me Bloodstained Dusk, chapter 2-3)* This one makes messes on people if you want ^^ I need him back soon though so enjoy his presence for the current chapter.

That's all I got, but I gotta get back to writing me fanfic! Later! *runs off being chased by nice men with white suits and needles and straitjackets*

Twilight: HIUGRASHI!!! I LOVED IT!

Keroanne1: BUT THE LAST EPISODE DOESNT COME OUT UNTIL AUGUST!!

Shadow: Ah crap here it comes

Twilight: ROOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!

Naruto: Twilight seems too lazy to write all this down so um yeah.

Kenkiro. Keroanne1 and Twilight: (watching Higurashi) MWAHAH!! BLOODY GOODNESS!

Kenkiro: Well bye! (runs away being chased by said people)

Ilia: This next review is from _**Kina Kalamari**_

_**Wow. I didn't expect you to use my review. (does happy dance) And I liked all the Japanese. Very cool language. Italian's cooler though.**_

Anyway, question for Midna: How come you don't like it when Wolf-Link dashes? Wouldn't it be fun to go faster? Or are you scared you're going to fall off?

Arrividerci! (good-bye in Italian, for those who don't know)  
~Kina

Naruto: (holding Twilight back by chains)

Twilight: L:KHDSF:LIH!!!!!!!!

Midna: O_O so this is what happens when you diss Japanese

Shadow: (takes a step back)

Midna: Link dashes only so I bump up and down on his back! You can figure out the rest….

Link: (Sly grin)

Naruto: That concludes today's reviews!

Twilight: Hey Naruto!

Naruto: Yeah?

Twilight: NO! I REALLY mean Naruto!

Naruto: (turns around to see the orange ninja) (bows to the hosts) I LOVE IT HERE!

Hosts: (silly face)


	17. Chapter 17

Keroanne1: Hello everyone….

Naruto: Hey why you look so down?

Shadow: There was an accident

Link: Really what happened?

Keroanne1: Twilight is in the hospital……

Zelda: Oh my God! How?

Shadow: Someone broke into her neighbors house and-

Naruto: Wait! Instead of doing it like that why not write it as a story?

Keroanne1: whatever

_Twilight was in the comfort of her house when a shriek of help caught her ear. Being curious she brought a bat with her and headed to the source of the yell. Twilight looked around and saw her neighbors lights on and wondered what they could be doing so late at night. It took a lot of courage for her to go inside and see what's wrong. Her cousin, Noah, (who is actually writing this chapter) tried to convince her with all her might not to go inside the house. But Twilight was always one step ahead. She told Noah to go call the police and stay on guard incase anything happened. (now from a different point of view) _

_Twilight walked into the house with her bat over her head (the neighbor told me everything) She looked around cautiously; she is really good when it comes to fighting so I really wasn't that worried. Twilight looked around fully alert when she heard a soft muffled noise. Twilight opened a room and found her neighbors and their kids tied at her feet. She ran back to the kitchen to get a knife and cut them free, but as she did this the robber came from behind his hiding place and hit her in the back of her head with his knife. _

_Twilight lost her balance for a moment but regained it and raised her bat. The robber was a little bit shocked that she didn't fall unconscious but pulled out his knife. He swung at Twilight but missed and Twilight hit him in the head with her bat……. Hard. He walked around like a drunk and Twilight gave him another hit with her bat in the face knocking him out cold. And this all happened in front of her neighbors. She opened them up with the robber's knife and set them free. She realized that their little girl was missing. She looked around and saw her being chocked to death by the robber. He said if she came closer he would kill her, but Twilight was too smart. She stalled him by saying weird stuff in some other language, luck was her side because as she talked in this weird language the winds howled in rage. (The wind sounded like that for half hour before this happened) Being aware of what was going on he threw the girl toward her and ran out the house. Or so Twilight thought._

_He actually made it look like he ran but he came back running towards them with his knife raised at the little girl. They only thing Twilight could think of was throwing herself in front of the girl taking the stab. Her wound was gruesome and terrible that the knife cut through her whole body and came out the other side! After waiting all I could I decided to go check up on Twilight. When I got there and saw her body on the floor I scream liked there was no tomorrow. Fortunately the police arrived and arrested the man. _

_But as her cousin I really don't give a fuck what happened to that little piece of shit. All I cared about was Twilight. She was placed on the stretcher and taken to a nearby hospital. _

Noah: And now we wait to she if she lives or dies.

Link: Wow that's….. that's really bad dude

Zelda: Like what are we going to do now? Twilight's the only one who can write this story

Ilia: I guess, like, we have to improvise.

Midna: How the hell are we gonna "Improvise"

Naruto: didn't you read the latest chapters? Why don't you, like, try and do what Twilight does from reading the other chapters

Keroanne1: Well it's not like Noah's funny

Noah: (slap) Bitch

Shadow: And she curses too much

Noah: (punch) whore

Link: And I think she is a LIIITTTLLE bit emo

Noah: (cutting herself) What of it?

Naruto: Should we stop?

Noah: Nah nigga! We gonna do this for Twilight! (I'm a girl btw)

**Nichelle M**

_**Well its been a bit since i last reviewd * was Nakori17 but changed her name.***_

Link I Dare you to Kiss Ganondorf!

*laughs manicly*

Doctor:...Sorry about her she has been up really late working on Doctor who fan fics... * drags me out as i still laugh like a mad person*

Noah: does this weird shit always happen?

Link: btw how did you get into Twilight's fanfiction account?

Noah: She wrote it on a piece of paper so she didn't forget.

Keroanne1: …………..

Noah: Who is Ganondorf?

Shadow: I think this person (opens door)

Ganondorf: (giggle) Oh Liiinnnnk! (is ganondorf a girl?)

Link: Ah geez another fan girl (runs away)

Naruto: I'M gonna read this one retards

_**Twili**_

_**-sighs- oh how I love this fanfiction  
DAREZZ!! YAYZ!! -is hyper from lack of sleep and too much manga and anime-**_

Midna, you have to go on a date with... -dun dun dun- ... Zant!

Zant, i have the videos proving you got high off of pixiesticks, if you would, do that again and give us all blessed entertainment!

READ INUYASHA!  
BESTEST MANGA EVERZ!  
OSUWARI! OSUWARI! OSUWARI!

Noah: Ok I might be mean for saying this but do you have a life?

Everyone: (beats the shit out of Noah)

Shadow: Anime is the shit!

Keroanne1: It's the thing that made Twilight write this in the first place!

Ilia: I'm guessing we have to call this "Zant" person

Noah: Oh my fucking God I went on the internet to see who Ganondorf is and BOY was I wrong

Midna: Did you research Zant?

Naruto: Hell yeah nigga and she gonna make you go out with his ass

Midna: ……………..

Zelda: NEXT!

_**EpicWyndfyer**_

_**Aw. No Zant. Ah, but...**_

I dare Zant to appear for one chapter. Or perhaps part of a chapter. Whichever would provide more lulz.

...and tell Link that he was featured in Out, a gay magazine. They're lovin' the dress, Skirt-Boy!

Noah: (laughing her ass off) Man you idiots sure know how to make a person laugh!

Link: Yeah but I sure as hell ain't laughing!

Ilia: I WILL KICK ZANT IN THE BAWLZ

Midna: But telling Link he featured in a gay magazine is nice

Zelda: I already told him

Keroanne1: How'd he take it?

Link: (having a seizure)

Naruto: I swear, this shit story keeps getting weirder

Noah: (crying) I MISS MY COUSIN!!!!

Naruto: This next one is from me!

_**Okay, this is the best christmas-in-May present EVER!! only...its not christmas...and its not May...still, this rocks! Im still kinda depressed only a few people read my story...And I wanna throw a party in my becoming of a host!  
Everyone: Im sad. GROUP HUG!  
Zelda: Bake a cake for the party.  
Link: Help me with the dacorations.  
Hosts Excluding me: I bought you all first class trips to...**_

(wait for it, wait for it)

JAPAN! Go wild there while we have a party here. We'll save you some cake.

All Zelda characters: Give me presents.

When party is over and the hosts come back, the real torture begins.

Zelda: youre a fat sack-o-sh(bleep)t Have Itachi (he's from Naruto the show and he can put people in transes to make them see the most horrifying things for 3 days strait) put you in a trans for 3 days. what is the trans, you ask? In the trans you will see zant doing the chicken dance. naked.

Link: you still rock. no dares for you.

Ilia: I dont really like you today. Link gets to go STABBY-STABBY-RIPPY-STAB on you if he wants to.

Saria: Go on a date with me (dont worry, I dont try to get a "happy ending" with you after 5 seconds)

Gannon: Im gonna kill you by kicking you in the balls 89345567676575634992304583496456458935694964 times.

Ahh...Imma go watch Naruto now. Lates.

Naruto: WOOOOOOT

Noah: Nigga that shit long

Link: Seriously man

Shadow: We cant do any of this without Twilight!

Keroanne1: We'll do all this when Twilight gets better ok?

Naruto: Okkkkkk……………

_**Twili-Wolfboy**_

_**What the freak?! I never asked her to marry me! I know it might be weird that I love Midna, but COME ON! Good story but... Kinda weird...**_

Okay this dare is for Zelda, She had to dress up in leather, get on a motorcycle, and go on a date with Cloud Strife from final fantasy...

Noah: Eh.....

Keroanne1: Must you comment on every review?

Noah: Hellz yeah

Naruto: (tackles Zelda and forces her in leather get up)

Midna: Now ride off into the sunset and kiss passionately!

Everyone: What you talking about fool?

Midna: I was just joking…..

Keroanne1: This is from me

_**HOW DID YOU KNOW I LOVE HIGURASHI?!? I love Hanyu! 3 3 3 3 3 And Mion and Shion and Rena and Keiichi and Rika and Satoko and... EVERYONE EXCEPT TAKANO AND OOISHI (Sometimes).**_

So... anyway, I guess I'll go bomb Link now... or something along those lines, anyway. *shoves bomb down Link's skirt*

Well, that was fun. And Rianix had a good time terrorizing near-by villages around my house.

So... now I dare Ilia to eat poopy! Yay! 8D And then let me take an ax to your neck! Because I love violence! 3

Anyway, I suppose that's it for now. Bai bai! lol

Noah: NO!!!! NOT YOU TOO!!!!! _

Keroanne1: Why?

Noah: Twilight's been bugging me forever to watch it! She's like blood this gore that. And I'm like OH MY GOD!!! SHUT UP!!

Shadow: It IS a good anime……...

Naruto: Is there a reason you want Ilia to eat shit?

Keroanne1: Hellz yeah. I was bored as fuck

Naruto: O_o

Ilia: (boarding a plane to Singapore)

_**Zelda Obsessed! **_

_**hey twilight,will you let me help host the next chappie? please! do it! or i wont give you this cake *holds out cake*! please! pretty please with Rainix on top?? PLEASE!**_

Shadow: Oh great here come the water works.

Noah: TTWWWWWWWWWWWIIIIILLLLIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHTTTTTT!!!!!

Zelda: (takes off ear plugs) Is she done being retarded?

Naruto: Twilight will answer that later

Keroanne1: I MISS MAH ANIME BUDDY!

_**CrimsonDarkness 0013**_

_**If you liked Higurashi, you'll be glad to see it's even bloodier counterpart XD Umineko No Naku Koro Ni XD Translation; When the Gulls Cry, like seagulls? Just as insanely bloody when you read it! Anyways, more dares!**_

Link-...have your face smashed in like it was done in the manga, which is SO detailed XD with very painful objects

Zelda- You too

Ganondorf- Yeppers

Zant- Yup, you too.

Midna- Hell noes! You gonna see them having their faces smashed in with me :D

Twilight- Read Midna's condition! XD

Yes, Japanese rocks, though I speak Spanish...weird huh, but I'm practicing with Japanese right now XD Sayonara Twilight-Sama! Midna-Sama! *looks at Link* Link-baka! XD *runs away from even more men in white suits with straitjackets and 

_**needles***_

_**Holy!! I almost forgot! I need to torture Ilia too!! XD LEt's see...*injects her with Hinamizawa syndrome* Buaha! Okay, now I gotta keep runnin'! Laters! *runs off***_

Noah: OH MY FUCKING GOD!!! YOU TOO!?!?!

Keroanne1: hehe

Shadow: Allow me to smash in your faces (takes out a bat)

Link: (runs for his life) [I'm not a fan of blood and violence]

Zelda, Ganondorf, and Zant: (try to call a magical cow to take them away)

Noah: Now it took me a while to find out what "Hinamizawa syndrome" was but I found it

Ilia: O_O what are all these maggots in my body? HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!! (kills a nearby person) YOUR WERE GONNA KILL ME HUH!??! (claws at her throat) so itttccchhyyyy……. AAAAAHH!!! (claws open her throat and dies)

Everyone: …………..

Noah: Well that's it for this chapter. But please if you want Twilight's return keep her in your prayers tonight.

Everyone: Bye!


	18. Chapter 18

Keroanne1: YAY!!!

Twilight: Ok guys no rough housing

Everyone: (glomps her)

Twilight: (twitches)

Link: (pats her back) Nice to have you buddy!

Twilight: STOP!!

Everyone: O_o

Twilight: Noah sounded like a gangster in the other chapter so everyone might be confused. I just wanna say we aren't those kind of people.

Link: She's white

Twilight: Hey! Don't be racist!

Shadow: T__T I thought you were gonna die

Twilight: I'm just a stain that's to hard to remove (silly face)

Keroanne1: WE THOUGHT YOU WENT TO THE BIG LIVINGROOM IN THE SKY!!

Zelda: Why living room?

Twilight: Because that's where I watch my anime :P

Ilia: Uh huh thought so

Twilight: I just wanna say that all of you reading this are awesome, especially my hard core fans. I love you all

Midna: Aww how touching

Twilight: Now to beat the crap out of Noah yay!

Keroanne1: Same as usual…..

Shadow: We don't even know what to do this chapter

Link: Do do do do do do

Twilight: (slap) I (slap) wanted (slap) to (slap) do (slap) this (slap) for (slap) a (slap) long (slap) time!!! (SLAP)

Link: _ good to have you back buddy….

Twilight: Well guys I'm really tired and cant continue writing this since my chest hurts so much. But be sure to check out my Deviant art profile "TwilightWolf18" now I know I'm crappy at drawing I just like to show them :D


	19. Chapter 19

Twilight: (casually walks into the studio) Wow... it's completely deserted

Link: Well that's what you get for leaving and not coming back

Zelda: (looks around) Holy crap, who died?

Ilia: I feel...that someone... NO IT CANT BE

Twilight: ewe YES, I AM BACK BABY... AND PROPBABLY HAVE NO MORE VIEWERS

Mida: ... I swear you're such an idiot

Twilight: (slaps) NO BACK TALK

Mida: I wanst eve-

Twilight: (slaps again)

Midna: ...

Twilight: OH IT'S GOOD TO BE HOME

Link: (slowly sobs in his corner)

Ilia: Hey! I remember that corner! It's Link's emo corner!

Zelda: o_o Link has an emo corner?

Midna: Well now he does

Link: (still sobbing)

Twilight: I think we should start fresh again! No more hosts, new review-

Navi: I FOUND YOUUUUU 8DDD

Everyone: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHY!

Twilight: (grabs Link's collar) Didnt I tell you to get rid of her!

Link: I did! But SHE NEVER DIES

Navi: (giggles innocently)

Midna: (facepalms)

Twilight: OH! I just want to say I DIDNT DIE...I JUST...FORGOT ABOUT YOU

Viewers: ...

Twilight: Eheh...

Ilia: they're not gonna buy it.

Zelda: (filing her nails)

Twilight: (snatches the nail filer and tosses it over her shoulder) THEN WE MUST WIN THEM BACK

Zelda: ...why the hell did you do that?

Twilight: I!... have no idea

Midna: Dum dum...

Twilight: no YOU'RE a dum dum

Midna: I wanst... nevermind

Navi: Hey! Hey! Hey! HEY!

Twilight: (twitches)

Navi: LOOK!

Twilight: WHAT!

Viewer: o.o...

Ilia: ewe we have a viewer~

Twilight: o_o... (ties him to a chair) Well! You know what to do! Review and stuff and yeah I'm tired

Link: I swear all these comments are gonna be about ME getting tortured, cant any of you be creative?

(crickets chirp)

Ilia: Guess that's a no

Twilight: baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaai~


	20. Chapter 20

Twilight: OH HELLO MY LOVELY CHEELDREN!

Link: (snoring on a couch with bunny pajamas on)

Ilia: (taking pictures)

Midna: (watching T.V)

Zelda: (filing her nails) Hey Twilight~

Navi: (somewhere being annoying)

Twilight: What the hell guys? I told you we got a review!

Midna: Yeah but only one…

Twilight: Oh shut up and be grateful :c Besides! It's from out buddyyyyyyy

Link: (snorts and wipes drool)

Ilia: (rolls her eyes and kicks Link)

Link: NO I SWEAR ZELDA I DIDN'T SLEEP WITH RUTO

Everyone: o_O…..

Link: (coughs)

Twilight: …. Okay then… FFF I FEEL SO ALONE!

Midna: This is from _**CrimsonDarkness0013 **_and she said

_**-glomp- Gore-buddy! 8D Midna-sama! Link-baka! How I missed messing with idiots and giving gifts to all you so! XD Because I was counting down everyday you were gone! And no Link, don't walk out that door. *throws ice keese at him to stop him from escaping* Hehe. I got plans for you all I've been waiting to do, but since I need to find that list again...**_

Rianix, here's your welcome back dinner -claps twice brings in a thousand paid chefs with every luxurous food known to dragons-

Midna and Twilight, I"m running out of ideas what to gives you and your awesomeness D8...so I think I'll just give you these backstage VIP passes to the next E3 and Comic-con XD

Navi- ...*grabs her in fist and sends her to Chuck Norris, putting on the box- You know what to do Norris-sama* There, no more Navi xD for now...

Link, you have an all freee, paid-expense trip the the majical land of...

*dramatic pause*

Silent Hill! 8D Say hi to the Pyramid heads for me! *kicks him through portal to SH* Haha, too bad he's never gonna get out until the end of the chappie or under Twilight-sama's awesome author powers, but moving on.

And I gotz Kingodm Hearts; Birth by Sleep on the PSP 8D *happy indeed* Happy times indeed! I shall find my list soon enough for mega-bloody-painful torture soon enough! XD Be prepared! And Link, I do have enough creativity to spare and because you're so wiling, you'll be the one to try out my latest ones XD Buahahaha!

Link: WHAT THE HELL IS THIS CRAP?

Twilight: FFFF I LOVE YOU **SO MUCH**

Link: WELL I SURE AS HELL DON'T

Midna: (cuddles the backstage passes)

Twilight: (reaches for one)

Midna: (barks and snaps at her hand)

Twilight: GAH (runs around in circles) MIDNA GET OFF!

Midna: (growls like a Chihuahua)

Ilia: (taps her foot)

Link: What?

Ilia: I AM PISSED THAT NO ONE LIKES ME

Zelda: I'm sure it's not your fault (makes a mocking hand behind her back)

Twilight: RIANIX! GET YOUR SCALEY BUTT HERE!

Rianix: Yo, thanks for the food (eats the chefs)

Twilight: What the hell Rianix!

Rianix: …..OH SHIT THAT WASN'T FOR ME?

Navi: (face palm)

Zelda: (catches her in a bottle and throws her to Kinkiro)

Kinkiro: OH YES BABY (runs away with Navi) (foams at mouth)

Navi: HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY

Chuck Norris : What the hell?

Navi: HEY

Chuck: …

Navi: LOOK

Chuck: …

Navi: LISTEN!

Chuck: (has a mental break down)

Midna: (pokes him with a stick) o.O

Twilight: OH FUCK SHE CAN DO THAT NOW?

Link: (slowly crawls to him emo corner)

Twilight: NO YOU'RE NOT!

Link: DDDx I DUN WANNAAAAAA

Twilight: FFFF (ties him and drags him to silent hill)

Link: (rocking back and forth) …

Twilight: (looks around) Hm… not bad… HOLY FUCK A PYRAMID

Link: WHERE!

Twilight: AHAHA (snaps picture) ewe

Link: …

Ilia: Um… what the hell was that?

Navi: 8D

Midna: What are you smiling about?

Navi: 8D

Midna: …

Navi: 8D

Midna: (hits her with a bat)

Zelda: (sigh) This review is from _**Kreite **_and he says

_**alright you don't know me but I have been reading your fic for a while and I can't belive you tied me to a chair "struggles"**_

...

well I guess I have no choice alright heres a dare for you all

Link: you have to not talk for the an entire chapter then you have to wait for everyone to buch togeither when the're not thinking about it and yell right next to them "THIS WAS A DARE BITCHES!"

Zelda; I've read a few fanfics of TLOZ and I'm tired of zelink so heres a gears of war lancer and some extra ammo clips to fend of those rabid fans should they advance on you again (bare in mind this is only its official purpose I'm sre you an up with a more "creative" use being the wise one and such)

Ilia: inhale a dangurous amount of helium (I don't hate you I just want so see you speak even higher than foamy the squrrel)

Navi

I'll take care of you personally my treat to the cast, "burns through ropes with spooky powers holds navi and takes her out of the studio"

Navi:!

"long silence"

me:done

cast:O-O

END

before you make the mistake you have read the review of a british male in his mid teens speking of which

"pours boiling hot tea all over twilight"

Twilight: (runs around in circles) WHAT THE HELL MAN!

Kreite: What? D8 Don't you English bloke like tea?

Twilight: NOT ON MY FUCKING HEAD

Link: (laughing)

Twilight: or you're a dead man

Link: ewe (cannot speak)

Zelda: (stares at all the weapons) o-o….(crawls into her happy corner)

Ilia: I thought her happy corner was her vibra-

Zelda: ILIA!

Midna: o_o (sniff…) I'm so happy…

Link: (draws question mark in the air)

Midna: (stares at him blankly) NAVI IS GONE

Twilight: Gone? No I think she went to the bathroom (walks in) OMFG WTH WHAT IS THIS CRAP!

Midna: …..it's crap Twilight

Twilight: Dx….

Zelda: hehe…

Ilia: OKAY! I got the balloon 8D (sucks in helium)

Zelda: Well?

Ilia: (in a deep man voice) LAAA…O_O

Twilight: (laughing so hard tears are coming out) IT SOUNDS LIKE CHUBACA!

Link: D8

Twilight: (gathers herself) Okay, this last review is from _**ZeldaObsessed**_ and she said

_**OH MY GOSH! YOU UPDATED! I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD! I LOVE YOUUUUU! Wanna make me a Co-Host? ;)**_

Twilight: :I

Zelda: Guess that's a no

Midna: (brushing her teeth) Buf wai?

Ilia: (in her deep man voice) Why are you brushing your teeth?

Midna: (chokes on her toothbrush) WHAT THE HELL!

Twilight: BAHA!

Link: THIS WAS A DARE BITCHES

Kreite: (in his happy place)


	21. Chapter 21

Twilight: (walks in eating a hamburger) Dun dun dun CANT TOUCH THIS (echoes) this this this…

Link: (stretches) Yes, it has been that long that there is an echo

Twilight: D: ….we must fix that!

Zelda: You're bored aren't you?

Twilight: Sadly yes, so let's begin! (laaaaaaa!~)

_**My original name was that 'Twiliwolfboy' but I change it. And lo and behold, I laughed when I saw that review. I put it up as a joke if I remember correctly, so Midna stop killing me in my dreams. You can't kill a Demon... er- Half-Demon.**_

Speaking of 'Half-Demon', I've got something to tell you Link. You're the Son of Sparda, and the brother of Dante and Vergil. That's why you can't die, because you CAN'T. Ilia, go to Hell so Vergil can have a little 'Playmate'. And when Dante arrives, have him shoot Navi. Midna, even though Link might be dumb at times, he loves you. You love him, don't deny it, because the 'Flinch in your eye calls your bluff'. And protecting you gives Link the power to unleash his demon side to protect you at all costs.

Sweet dreams! Awesome story so far!

Twilight: DANTE'S INFERNO! YOU'RE MY NEW BESTEST FRIEND (glomps)

Link: (gulp) Waaaait, I'm a dead guy? HOW DID I DIE!

Ilia: (whistling)

Link: NOOOOOOOOO! (falls to knees) WHA-HA-HA-HHHHHHIIII?

Vergil: 8D Sup gurl (drags Ilia)

Ilia: WAIT STOP HELP MEEEEEEEEE!

Link: Bitch _

Dante: Don't think you're out of this one

Link: But I'm loved in this one D:

Dante: Oh God Lord… Where's my scythe? BEATRICE WHERE THE F*CK IS MY SCYTHE!

Beatrice: Honestly I don't know why I put up with you…(hands him the scythe)

Dante: Thank you, by the way the slave girl was better looking (Hacks away at Navi)

Midna: While he's doing that and Ilia is being raped by a ghost-

Ilia: (Muffles scream)

Midn: I don't love Link, you think I'd love that loser who shoves IRON BALLS UP HIS BU-

Twilight: OKAY! Well, I love that post :F noooow for the next one

Zelda: When did you get so normal?

Twilight: (taps her chin) I don't knoooww….

Link: (dryly) this review is from- (gets smacked)

Twilight: ARE YOU SPEAKING BORINGLY ON MY SHOW! Do I need to bring out "The Man" here again?

Link: No…(ahem) And this review is from _**dare-to-dream**_

_**Thanks for updating, Twilight :D.**_

Twilight: No problem! 8DDD

Zelda: (whacks) Shhh!

_**alrighy, for the first time ever, i have a dare *evil grin* . Link, i date you to join a body building course for a month, then walk into a large crowd of rabit fangirls...shirtless :D. i'm in an evil mood today :D**_

Link: But but but!

Twilight: No butts! Now go and tone yours! Let us wait c:

Ilia: For a month?

Twilight: Yes and WAIT HOW'D YOU GET HERE!

Ilia: I'll never tell

Minda: Okaaay….

_**1 month later**_

Everyone except Twilight: (dying of starvation)

Twilight: c:

Ilia: WHERE THE HELL IS THAT BOY!

Link: (comes in looking orgasmic)

Zelda: Finally…now gimmie your shirt and get out!

Link: At least let me! (gets kicked out)

Girl: THERE IS ISSSH! GET HISH BODY!

Fan girls: (attack him)

Link: (yelps) I'm not supposed to be bitten there!

Midna: PHAAAAHAHAH!

Zelda: Told ya she didn't love him

Ilia: Where's Navi?

Twilight: (mimicking) I'll never teeeeell

Zelda: this review is from _**linkluvr01**_ Link lover? Pshhh yeah right….

_**Yay! You updated! I is happy again! **_

Twilight: I KNOW ME TOO

Zelda: (whacks again) Cut that out!

_**Ok, I has some things that Link needs to do...**_

Link, you must go 12 hours without talking or making any sound at all. :D good luck with that...

oh and Twilight, please take Link's hat away from him for the entire 12 hours. Have fun! lol

Twilight: (whining) But he's being maaaaaauled Dx

Midna: Shoot and I thought this one was going to be fun (snaps)

Link: (from outside) WILL NO ONE HELP ME!

Twilight: (throws a chicken bone out the window)

Fangirls: CHICKEN! (runs after)

Link: (has bite marks in several places) (pantng) all this time…they were hungry!

Twilight: Well duh I haven't fed them in days

Zelda: (blinks) You…keep them as pets?

Twilight: Sure do! Oh (snatches Links hat) yay!

Link: TRAAH!

Zelda: That grunting thing sounds like you have something shoved up your-

Midna: Zelda! Remember we're not allowed to say such profanity!

Zelda:…..what? WHAT? You guys wanna know what she does after the show! SHE-

Midna: (tackles her) SHHHHHHH!

Zelda: That's what I thought _

Ilia: This next review is from _**Kina Kalamari**_

_**The dare I have for you is something that I'm not even completely sure you can pull off. In fact, I'm willing to bet a family size bag of pretzels (my absolute favorite snack food) and a box of powdered donuts that you can't. Here it is:**_

I dare you ALL to act like civilized people for a bit. You have to be nice to each other, you have to not throw temper tantrums, you have to avoid murdering anyone, etc. And you have to not use any expletives worse than "Gosh darn!" or "Confound it!"

So, think you can handle it? When I've read the chapter with this dare in it, I'll decide how well you did and judge in my next review. If you somehow manage it, I'll (twitch) fork over the snacks. If you fall short, though, you'd better have gone shopping recently.

Good luck! (evil smile)

Twilight: (twitch twitch)

Midna: (twitch twitch)

Link: hehe….

Twilight: (stabs him) NO TALKING YOU HOG MONKEY

Zelda: Aaaaand we failed

Ilia: It was known we weren't gonna pass it anyway

Link: (dying)

Twilight: (ahem) This next review is from (gasp) MY FAVORTIST PERSON EVAR!

Midna: Where does she come up with these words?

Ilia: I dunno but she sounds stupid

_**CrimsonDarkness 0013**_

_**Alright alright, onto the real deal XD lol...**_

Link, you never cease to amaze me when you're hurt or in extreme suffering...which is why you shall be stuck in a room hearing... *room goes dak and lightly flashes in the background* Justin Bieber songs for hours end O_O *lightning crash* Bye 8D

*kicks him into room welding it shut and holding no means of escape as he's left to suffer from such torture*

Ilia- Of course I don't like you 8D It only makes as much sense as a Shion senselessly stabbing Satako on a torturing cross over and over. Speaking of, role playing! *switches scene to Ilia being in Satako's place* Who want's to be Shion and do the honors? XD

Zelda- Why should the game be named after you? I know Legend of Link doesn't sound that great but you don't do crap. Wear ameat suit around a dog pound and we'll see how it goes.

Midna- You video tape so we can send the video on youtube XD

Zant- *shrinks him to the size of a dart with his helmet on and shoots him into a corner with a pile of cobwebs from the cleaning up the studio needs, black widows quickly surrounding him* That was needed.

Twilight- Hm...what's your choice anime or video game you can think of at the moment? XD

That's all for now folks XD *off to conitnue playing BBS*

Twilight: (jaw drops)

Link: ever notice how her reviews are always long and end up torturing me?

Midna: (stabs) NO TALKING

Link: (does his famous scream as he flies into the room and cries from Justin Bieber) SHE'S TOO MUUUCH

Zelda: It's a guy

Link: (screams louder and claws and bangs at the door)

Twilight: OH OH OH! I WANNA BE SHION!

Ilia: WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE ME!

Twilight: I dunno, in real life I loved you D: but here? Meeeeh (stabs over and over)

Midna: While Twilight is creating a horrifying scene over there

Ilia: (screaming)

Midna: (Shoves Zelda in a meat suit) OFF TO THE POUND! (drags her there)

Zelda: (shivers and looks around) H-hi dogs….and…much larger dogs…behind cages HAH, suckkerrrsss

Midna: MAN! And I'm on probation so I cant do anything…sorry youtube!

Twilight: (comes back and sighs in content) Aaaahh… here's the last review from mah buddeh _**Keroanne **_

_**HAY**_

I WANNA MAKE LINK EAT PICKLED PEARS

AND THEN I IS GUNNA STAB HIM

8)

Twilight: Be our guest! We already stabbed him multiple times today 8D

Keroanne: Hehe…wait heeeeeell no I'm not going in there with Justina Bieber!

Zelda: (sigh) (opens the door and Link comes flying out and running into Keroanne's knife)

Keroanne: HAH! (shoves pickles pears down his throat) SUCK IT BITCH

Midna: How come she gets to say profanity!

Keroanne: Because….I'm awesome (poofs)

Twilight: WHAT! HOW SHE GETS TO POOF AND I DO- oooooh yeah. I can poof ewe hehe

Zelda: O.o uh, here's that one review that was just a compliment

_**TheSageOfHyrule**_

Twilight: (gaaaaaaasp) YOU'RE A SAGE!

_**i think i just died laughing**_

This is so good!

-TheSageOfHyrule


	22. Chapter 22

Twilight: Yoooo!

Ilia: Shut up e.e

Twilight: What's wroooong?

Ilia: Oh the fact that I'm stuck in a story that never seems to end.

Midna: You sound emo

Twilight: I WANNA START THE STORY

_**ok i've got a question for link did midan brake your heart when she broke the mirror of twilight and left you ok dare time link and midan in human form have s** in the bedroom that's all :) p.s i've beaten legend of zelda twilight princess and twilight you the hottest person besides midan human and you should go on a date with midan in human and i'm a boy and i'm 13 years old**_

Everyone: (blankly stares)

Twilight: Did I just read what I thought I did?

Link: HAH! (points and laughs) AHAHAHAHA

Twilight: (sucker punches him) YOU BASTARD (bites) HOW DARE YOU CALL ME NOT PRETTY

Link: (chokes and wiggles) HELP MEEE

Zelda: (laughing her ass off)

Midna: And this kid's 13! Hitting on a 19 year old!

Link: (clears throat) um…about the first dare…

Twilight and Midna: NO

Link: Right…

Zelda: This one is from _**Latias Hylian Wolf**_

_**Yay,I got dares!And yes I AM a girl. *does cute anime pose***_

Link: I turn you into a fairy.

Tingle: Rape Fairy Link.

Midna: Attempt to do plastic surgery on Zant

_**Zant: Accept your fate. *evil twili smile***_

Ilia: Marry Epona. X3

Ganon: I get to torture you for an hour. With my sub machine gun.

Great going, Twilight!

___**Latias**_

Tingle: ARE YOU SERIOUS! (Chases Link with his pants off)

Link: (tries to fly with one wing) Why one wing!

Twilight: Because…I have….THE POWER!

Midna: (holds up doctors equipment) what am I supposed to give him?

Zant: Oh oh! I know! (whispers in her ear)

Midna: (cracks up) Alright! And you'll have to keep your end of the deal if I do

Zant: Oh I wiiiillll ewe

Midna: ONTO THE OPERATING TABLE MY EXPERIMENT!

(half hour later)

Zant: (caresses his double D chest) Oh LIiiink! Am I sexy for you now!

Link: o_o….uh…

Zant: (glomps him) RUB CHESTS WITH ME!

Link: NO NO RAAAAAAPE! (cries hysterically)

Zant: (drags him away)

Twilight: CAN I BE A PREACHER FOR ILIA!

Zelda: Wont you help Link?

Link: (muffled scream from the bedroom)

Twilight: hm…..nah. ANYWAY! ILIAAAA!

Ilia: I'm already married to Epona

Twilight: o-O whaaat? Who married you?

Ilia: WHY DOES EVERYONE ASK THAT

Zelda: o_o and did Epona agree

Ilia: (says really fast) SHEDIDNTHAVETOO

Midna: freak…

Ilia: Our babies will be beautiful

Twilight: Wait..did you?

Ilia: yes ewe

Zelda: I feel bad for Epona

Midna: (smacks her) I forbid bestiality! BEGONE SINNER

Ilia: Next review e.e

Zelda: This is by _**TheOracleofTIme**_

_**Okay I dare Link to sing it's friday by rebecca black! Midna you rock so...yeah. Ilia you have to watch (on youtube) TheMetroidBrother's (my channel) let's play of ocarina of time! Thats it! Thanks for updateing twilight! Heres a cookie! (bomb)**_

Twilight: Link is being raped by Zant, sorry

Midna: Ff, I know I rock you loser

Zelda: That's not nice!

Midna: (deep voice) I'm not nice (dramatic face)

Ilia: Will I find animal porn on there?

Twilight: You watch animal porn?

Ilia: ….maybe

Twilight: o: !

Zelda: Twilight, that's not so surprising

Twilight: Not that, dipwad, I got a cookie! (attacks it)

(cookie explodes)

Twilight: MOTHER FU-

Midna: Okay! Next review is-

Link: (bursts from the room and runs away crying)

Ilia: I found Link! 8D

Everyone: (Stares blankly)

Zant: (stands all sexy by the door) Oh man, that was AWESOME

Zelda: O_O YOU GAVE HIM A SEX CHANGE!

Midna: yes I diiiiid ewe

Zelda: …that is the best thing that ever happened here

Midna: Better than the time two chicks took you to-

Zelda: (punches her) SHUT UP!

Twilight: Anywaaaaay, since my cookie blew up in my face (Stares blankly at reviewer) the next one is from….what the hell?

Link: (back from therapy) what?

Twilight: There's like 7 reviews but it all looks like it came from the same person! I'm not doing thiiiis I hate bad grammar. (no offense Dx)

Zelda: Then the next one is from _**FoxPilot**_

Twilight: LIKE FOX McCLOUD! ?

Zelda: …..

_**...How is it that I haven't been reading this? No seriously, ToD-style things are fun!**_

Twilight: I dunno, the economy, the weather the-

Midna: (smack)_****_

Truth:

Link-can you stab people with your gravity-defying hat?

Dare:

Ilia-I don't hate you for some odd reason (don't tell my friends...oh, wait...(bleep)!). So instead, Tingle gets froxen in carbonite and used as a pinata at the Four Giants' birthday party.  


_**Do you know the muffin man? The muffin man? The muffin man! Do you know the muffin man, who lives on Drewy(?) Lane?**_

Link: o_o….(stabs FoxPilot)

Fox: WHAT THE HELL MAN! ? NOT ME!

Link: But you were the only person allowed that I could stab Dx

Twilight: Eh….I'm too lazy to do the other one.

Ilia: Because it has me in it?

Twilight: Pretty much

Midna: (mutters) I know the muffin man e.e

_**megzarie**_

_**Hey sup! Long time no see? ;)anyway,let's get started with the dares!:**_

Link: you gets to have a get of dare free ! You must take your shirt off and keep it off the whole chapter. Have fun!

Zelda:visit the land of Oz and bring back a souvenir!

Midna: I dare you to have a tomato fight with Zant. Loser gets to wear a clown suit.

Zant:see the above dare

Twilight: I give you an ak-47. feel free to kill anyone in the crew.

random julian in castltown# 5: did you know that shoes will be the death you?

Happy daring!, megzarie :')

Link: FUCK YEAH (takes off shirt and chills)

Zelda: lucky bastard….

Zant: (massaging his boobs) EXCUSE ME, I HAVE BOOBS NOW YOU CANT TELL ME TO DO ANYTHING WITH THESE KNOCKERS

Midna: (throws a tomato at him)

Twilight: (hugs gun) ewe…..

Everyone: DUCK!

Twilight: (goes all gun happy and accidentally shoots the camera

**1 hour later**

Twilight: (has a bandaid over her nose and is reading an apology card) (reading dully) And I promise not to shoot any civilians or worry the viewers of any- THIS IS BULLSPIT, WHO WROTE IT! ?

Link: (whistles)

Zelda: (comes back with tattered clothing and cuts and bruises) WHAT THE HELL MAN!

Twilight: What? D8

Zelda: Oz… I thought it was a happy little place, OH NO, it's horrible! Flying monkeys! HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE! ?

Midna: Did you bring me something?

Zelda: (throws the pelt of a flying monkey)

Ilia: This is from _**KinaKalamari**_

_**Heh, miserable failures, the lot of you. I want my pretzels.**_

Twilight: (Throws them at you) bitch e.e_****_

Okay, soooooo... A new dare thingy. Hmmm. -hands over a herd of elephants- You all have to work around them for an hour without getting trampled. And then...-dumps professional torturer in-...you have to deal with HIM! His specialties are nail removal (fingers AND toes), the acid-poured-into-your-unmentionables technique, and the lovely practice of racking and quartering. I'm sure he has a few other tricks up his sleeve as well. And you're stuck with him for two hours. Enjoy your gifts!

Twilight: (glomps the torturer) HEY

Torture: (shoves her off and punches her face)

Everyone: o_o ooooooh shit

Twilight: (foams at the mouth and stabs him repeatedly) YOU MOTHER FU-

Midna: (strangles her with her hair)

Twilight: (chocking) How can you do that! ?

Elephants: (trumpets)

Ilia: We're so gonna get evicted

Link: thanks for your 'gifts'

_**BlackXII**_

_**LOL, guess I was cut off on a short notice for the ToD's update. So Im gonna try and tone this one down a bit, so I can try harder to get my dares on the show! . unless you don't want my dares.**_

Oy Link. come over here. *Hands him a Rope that he has Tied 10 dozen fangirls with but Link doesn't know* hold onto this will you buddy? Thank you.

Zelda... Im going to go easy on you... hmmm Bearer of Triforce of Wisdom... How to torture? oh yeah *hands Twilight a Dunce hat* you know what to do. ;)

Zant... I despise the cracking noises... Stand perfectly still with no cracking of any part of your body! oh yeah and if you lose... well you can get eaten by Rianix...unless he's on a diet.  
Now then, Ilia. You, meet Balrog. *Causes a Balrog to Appear*

That wraps my time up good luck in your next update!

Link: I'm not holding that because I don't trust you!

Midna: Must I do everything? (pushes him in the crowd and watches him get mauled)

Twilight: (bows to the Dunce hat and pokes Zelda in the eye with it)

Zelda: YOU IDIOT, THAT'S NOT HOW A DUNCE HAT WORKS

Zant: ….who wants to crack their spine when I got DOUBLE D's BABY (buries face in boobs)

Ilia: Er….well that wraps up this chapter

Twilight: Aaaaaaaand for those who are curious, my picture's on my page~ YOU GET TO SEE YOUR CRAZY AUTHOR 8DDD

Link: Like anyone would like to see that (is shot with a gun)

Twilight: Bye ewe


	23. Chapter 23

Twilight: EVERYBODY CLAP YOUR HANDS

Link: No :I

Twilight: Aw why?

Link: Because you clap when you're happy or cheering, I am not happy

Twilight: Cuz you're with me? 8D

Link: Exactly e.e

Ilia: Let's just start the damn story

Twilight: (smacks) I FORBID YOU TO CUSS

Ilia: what I've been doing it this whole fricken time!

Twilight: NONE SHALL CUSS WHIE I AM THE ALMIGHTY

Zelda: If you were the almighty then we'd all be screwed

Twilight: (Roasting a cockroach) why?

_***Laughs* I saw the last review reply thing you did for my review. I should've specified. I meant 'Devil May Cry' Dante, but what you did still works. To reply to your 'Best Friend thing' YOU'RE MY NEW BESTEST FRIEND TOO!**_

O.o Link, I was right, you are dumb. At times. You're not dead! Your father was a demon and your mother was a human, simple as that. You're a hybrid between a demon and a human. YOU ARE NOT A DEAD PERSON! It's just that injuries that would normally kill a human, DON'T kill you.

Midna, seriously? Exactly how do you know Link does what you say he does? Do you part take in an activity such as that? Maybe he 'helps' you out with that and you two are 'intimate' on that kind of level? Very interesting... You do love him, despite whatever you say. I know.

Ilia... I could care less about what happens to you, so you lose your voice from screaming so much from 'playing' with Vergil. Twilight... I give you... A WEAPONS LOCKER!

And for Twilight, you are an awesome writer. Anyone with your talent for comedy has a sure fire way to get ahead in life. I congratulate you on that. Thank you for writing such an awesome story, keep it up!

Twilight: (bottom lip trembles) But… I WANTED DANTE'S INFERNOOOO (bawls)

Midna: (hands her an xbox360, T.V and a remote)

Twilight: WOOT (starts to play)

Zelda: What about the review?

Twilight: DO IT YOURSELF, PANSY ASS

Zelda: …..e.e

Link: OOoooh, so THAT explains why every time Twilight stabs me I live

Midna: yes….I love Link

Zelda: HOLY SHIT A BREAKTHROUGH

Twilight: (Slaps) NO CUSSING

Zelda: BUT YOU JUST CALLED ME A PANSY ASS!

Twilight: (dramatic chipmunk face)

Link: You….love me?

Midna: Yeah….when you fall flat on your face while running away

Ilia: Figures

Midna: Hey you're the one who steals his boxers and sells them on eBay!

Twilight: I don't want Ilia to lose her voice! It'll be less funny that way!

Ilia: Bitch…

Twilight: Aw! You're so sweet Shadow Wolfboy 3 (strangling Ilia) Wait…I have a weapon locker!

Ilia: (foaming at the mouth) help…me

Zelda: Uh O.o next review!

Midna: _**linkuvr01**_ said

Wow lol. Awesome.

_**Ok, so I just thought of this awesome way to keep Link from bugging you guys for a while. *Grabs Link's hat and hangs it from the ceiling, then takes away all of his items so he can't get to the hat in any way***_

There. That should keep him out of the way for a while.

Oh and here Twilight. You can have all of his weapons. Have fun!

-linkluvr01

Link: HEY!

Zelda: You forgot that Link will scale the wall to get it

Link: Traaah! (starts climbing and grabs the hat then slips and falls on his face)

Midna: (laughing her ass off) I love you Link!

Twilight: GAAAAAAAAAAASP since when! ? (I have to put a space between the exclamation point and question mark for it to show)

Midna: ….. why are you even here?

Twilight: :3

Ilia: She has enough weapons! STOP IT

Twilight: (Strangles) I DON'T HAVE CHUCK NORRIS

Zelda: This next review is from _**BlackXII**_

_**First off, LOL, Secondly I was actually curious on what you looked like in RL. Nice to have a mental image. Anyway DARING TIME!**_

ok we'll start off with a truth.

So this is just a big question Link but, why do you like the girls you work with, and dislike fangirls, are they like your weakness or something?

Now for my dares.

Link. Regardless of how you answer the question above...well... *Pushes him into a random Fangirl pit* They'll come get you in an Hour!

Hey Midna... beat the crap out of Zant for me. *Hands her assorted stuff to use* use whatever.

Zelda shoot a couple of light arrows at Ganon just to be random about it.

and that's all for now. Black XII out.

Link: I'm here because if we walk out the door without authorization we get tazed

All (even Twilight): (nods head)

Ilia: Why are you nodding your head?

Twilight: I forgot to give myself authorization and got tazed ewe….then loved the feel and kept doing it

Midna: Woooow and she's our dictator

Twilight: (flossing her teeth)

Link: (hugging his hat and rocking back and forth)

Zelda: Riiight, anyway this next review is from _**midanlover01**_

Midna: YOU SPELLED MY NAME WRONG

_**ok i'm sorry for what i said ok and i didn't know that you were 19 ok sorry i'm 13 i really didn't know ok and twilight and midan your both the hottest people on the cast.(cracks neck and fingers in cool way) Also I want to kill link for laughing at me and twilight(grabs dual m-16) p.s if zelda punches me she will die to with twilight,midan your both good girls ok by see you in hell link and zelda.**_

Everyone: o_o the fuck?

Twilight: You knooooow I think I'll just skip this

Everyone: (Murmuring in agreement)

Twilight: (Fires her m-16) NO GROUP MURMURING

_**Kina Kalamari**_

_**I will freely admit that Zant getting a sex change may just be the most disturbing thing I've heard this week. Well, there was that one thing concerning RuneScape and the Sims... No, the Zant thing is creepier.**_

So, being on vacation at a water park myself, I think I'll be nice to you all for once and give you a free vacation at a similar water park. Tube slides, wave pools, and hot tubs galore. Also, many many many chances to try to drown each other, which seems like it might just be up your alley.

And, if memory serves, Navi used to be in this. I believe she died, but I also thought she was supposed to be coming back. I don't much care for her, in fact she annoys the hell out of me like I'm sure she does most people, but annoying people are interesting in fics like this. Is she coming back, by any chance?

Twilight: WATER PAAAAAAAAAAARK GET YOUR SWIMMIES ON

Midna: Yes! (dives in a pool)

Link: o.o…(looks around)

Twilight: ewe….

Zant: (fondling his boobs) You wish you had my rack (snaps fingers)

Zelda: (face palms) Ugh…(sun tans in her bikini)

Midna: Navi? Oh right….man where did I shove that girl?

Twilight: When we find Navi we might bring her back…(on a giant floatie)

_**FoxPilot**_

_**Curses, Link! It's not deep as a well nor wide as a church door, but it'll do. *Dies.***_

*Comes back* death's boring. I have a much increased load today!

Truths:

Argarok and Vovlagia-are either of you related to Trogdor?

Bo-why can't you control your freak of a child?

Keaton-can I have a Keaton mask?

Dares:

Twilight-yes, like Fox McCloud. But that's -not- the inspiration! Anyway, force a character of your choice to fly through Area 6 from Star Fox 64 or have them die trying.

Midna-tell me the location of the muffin man! He owes me money!

I regret monkies!

Link: …can you teach me how to come back to life that fast?

Argarok: What the hell is wrong with you man! ?

Vovlagia: Do you really think we're related to that thing! ?

Argarok: No, wait we are

Vovlagia: Oh yeah….that's disappointing…

Bo: My freak child? Well she WAS dropped on her head multiple times, thought she was a boy AND made love to a horse. Do you think you can control that?

Ilia: (making out with Epona)

Bo: Ilia! Stop that you'll get the swine flu!

Zelda: (pulls down her sunglasses and stares) You get that from kissing a pig

Ilia: (hisses and dry humps Epona's leg)

Bo: !#$3! ? YOU SEE!

Twilight: (slaps) NO CUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSING!

Bo: That's it, I'm leaving (walks out the door and gets tazed)

Twilight: BWAHAAHA- (coughs) Oh shit I think he's having a seizure. And Area 6? Yes…yes indeed ewe…

Midna: (trying to fly an Arwing) WHAT THE (censored) I MEAN COME ON DO YOU THINK I CAN (beep) THIS THING! ? LOOK AT ME. LOOK AT ME (beep beep) THE ROAD RIGHT NOW. YOU THINK I'M DOING A GOOD JOB! ? MOTHER (beep) (beep) YOU TWILIGHT AND YOU'RE (beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep )

Twilight: My day is now completed. Oh Midna where's the muffin man!

Midna: YOU'RE (beep) (beep) (beep) and (beep) HAPPY! ?

Twilight: Did you get all that? 8D

Keaton: No you can't have a Keaton mask :I It's too fricken awesome for you

Hey everyone! Just wanna thank you all for liking, reviewing and being a part of this whole thing. Soooo as a reward I made a little website if any of you want to join 8D! I wiil be there _almost_ everyday! I might miss a day here or there but it's really cool :3. Hope you all can join~ The website is called www. Unholylust. proboards. com and there are no spaces of course~


	24. Chapter 24

Twilight: (rubs face, scratched chin and yawns)

Link: (watching porn with a blank expression)

Zelda: (watching it with him with the same expression)

Ilia: (talking on her phone) And she was all like NUH and I was all like NUH HUUUUH

Midna: (walks past her and punches her face as she nibbles a piece of toast)

Twilight: Oh hey…(yawns and sips coffee)

Link: (still watching porn his eyes going wide)

Zelda: (eyes go wide too)

Link: Pff, I can do that

(lady on the computer starts to scream)

Link: ….maybe not that

Ilia: Ooowww-uh! Minda! Like, why would you do that-uh!

Everyone: (stares at Ilia)

Twilight: (walks up to her) ….Who were you talking too?

Ilia: (holds the phone behind her back) No one!

Twilight: Give me the phone (holds hand out)

Ilia: (hisses) NEVAH

Twilight: (tackles her to the ground) GIVE ME THE GOD DAMN PHONE (bites hand and steals it) HELLO! ?

Zant: (rubbing his tits) Like, who is this?

Twilight: (death stare) DON'T CALL HERE AGAIN! (hangs up)

Midna: (with a full mouth) Let's begin the story!

_**Radius Flame**_

_**You're seriously ending this? It's too awesome to end! Can you do one more chapter? If you can pm me and I'll send you a dare and a couple of truths.**_

Twilight: Who said we were ending this! ? NEXT

_**godly345**_

_***hags from ceilling***_

Me- All right what is the big idea? Well since I'm here time for pay back.

Twilight:* shoots her with chiansaw lanser then burns all she owns* thats for messing with cousin Link !#+_"?^&#^#!

Midna and Zelda: I can see you are crazy for Link. I can smell your affection for him.*shows everyone videos that would mafe the fic rated M of what they do to Link when he is asleep* Some cultures say guys can have more than one wife.

Zant: ...*zaps him to oblivian*

Illia:* holds her upside down over lava* GIVE ME BACK MY DAMB STUFF BACK OR TO HADES YOU GO TO!

Goddesses: You are weak.* looks at them which turn them to stone* ! See?

Link: Here is Gonondork. He has no brain and is your slave for 12 chapters. If you get hurt from a dare or not the mindless puppet will take the blow for you.

Me- There you got yet another reviwer know LET ME OUT!

Twilight: … What the hell? Are you guys all high?

Link: (still watching the porn tape) D:

Zelda: =.= (smacks him)

_**CrazyZeldaFreak**_

_**Ilia: What in the world is so great about horses? Dare for Ilia: Go jump in a shark tank with fish blood all over you.**_

Link: What does it feel like to have faries heal you after you have died? What do potions taste like? Dare for Link:Dress like a ballerina and go to a popular area, then dance around.

Ilia: HORSES ARE THE BEST THING EVER. I LOVE THEM. Especially Epone (winks and blows a kiss to her)

Epona: (neighs)

ILIA: OH BABY (wraps herself around Epona and makes out with her, dry humping as well)

Twilight: (pulls a curtain over them that says CENSORED)

Link: When fairies heal me? Oh oh! It feels like I'm dancing with unicorns and butterflies! (makes a drooly face) And potions! Well…they kinda taste like shit despite their appearances

Twilight: WELL HOW ABOUT WE FEED IT TO YOU THE OTHER WAY

Midna: (eyes go wide) OH PLEASE LET ME HELP!

Everyone: (stares at Midna) o-o

Midna: ….what?

_**Molsdfsjdn something Lord**_

_**I was laughing so hard,well done Twilight**_

Twilight: Oh why thank you ewe

Zelda: (thwacks her) Shhhhhh

_**Just as I said before,I'll give the crew some questions and IT GOES!:**_

Link:would you make out with a fangirl?

Link: Like hell I would! Those things are infested like parasites!

_**Midna:Did you ever tried to...hmmm...how to say it?...get REALLY close to Link(for any reason)?  
**_

Midna: Yes, I have gotten close to Link. At night when I was shoving a hungry squirrel down his pants

Link: THAT WAS YOU!

_**Zelda:what's the best of being you?**_

Zelda: Who wouldn't want to me me? I'm the complete package. Fame, fortune, beauty, intellige- (gets smacked)

Twilight: (whiney voice) shut uuuup_****_

Ilia:How many kids are you gonna have?

Ilia: (stroking Epona's neck with her finger) How many should w have? Six! SEVEN! 8D

Epona: (softly cries)

Ilia: LOOK! TEARS OF JOY!_****_

Twilight:does it feels good to be almighty?  


Twilight: Hell yeah it does ewe_**  
**_

_**Now,for the dares:**_

Link:Use Midna as an ingredient for a chocolate cake,but you must keep her ALIVE and safe at the same share it with others so all of you can TRY to eat it.

Link: (tries to serve a midna cake) Enjoy!

Zelda: (licking her fingers) Cool what's in it?

Midna: my shit ewe

Zelda: (holds her throat and then throws up) WHAT THE FUCK! ?_****_

Midna:You're awesome(but don't even think about saying I'm a loser,because otherwise I'll go EXTREMELY hard on you with my dares,I'm serious),nonetheless,here is the Link is done baking you in the cake(which means,you're not allowed to do anything against that)you have to either,get the hell out of there as soon as you can OR slap(very hard)in the face anyone trying to eat you along with the cake during a full you succeed at the first option you can ask Twilight for cookies,but,if you succeed at the second option,I'll grant you the chance to avenge yourself from any reviewer(if you wanna avenge from me,I warn you,I'm armed with high-quality cakes to throw at your face,so don't even try).

Midna: We made a Midna shit cake instead! (jumps up and down in joy) :D_****_

Ilia:I've seen way too many people already tortured you,thus,just because I feel in a good mood(No,I don't like you) you can have this book about horses*hands her a horse book*it contains everything known about horses until the I dare you to take a look at the chapter about horse cruelty throughout the story and NOT to cry(,please headshot Ilia if she does).

Ilia: (straddling Epona) It's okay (eyes water up) we'll get through this together!

Epona: (noose tied around her neck)

Twilight: (stares at the noose) Did….did anyone do this?

Everyone: (shakes head)

Twilight: o-o_****_

Twilight:I dare you to bring Navi back to life and put up with her annoying squeaks for a whole day(then you can kill her again).

Twilight: OH HELL NAW (snaps fingers and shoot Mosifhosdf something Lord IN THE HEAD)

Ilia: YES NOW SHOVE SOMETHING IN HIS ASS

Everyone: (stares)

Link: …is that like the topic of the day or something?

Zelda: Don't give the idea in Twilight's head.

Twilight: WHO SAID MY NAME! ?

Midna: Uh….It was Ganondorf!

Twilight: (points at him) YOU FUCKER (tackles him to the ground and growls like a rabid Chihuahua and bites him)

_**KirisameLen**_

OMG nice chapter!

Now for some Dares/questions!

Link:

1. Why is it in every game your surrounded by girls but your still single?

you Gay Link? if your not gay then you have to kiss Ganondorf! if you are then can Zelda,Midna, and Ilia be a part of my harem please? :)(what it's such a waste to leave them with link!)

Ilia/Link:

I dare Link to dress up as a horse and have Ilia ride him all the way to.. well where ever Twilight wants them to go.

Zelda:

my friend wants to say some stuff to you:

you marry me Zelda? *get down on knees a presents ring*

2. i love you Zelda! i'm your biggest fan! i have a plushie of you!

3. will you bare my childr- okay i stopped him there...

thx and keep up the good work!

-Len

Link: (does a hair flip) I'm too freaking awesome

Twilight: HE HAS A SMALL PENIS

Link: WHY DID YOU HAVE TO TELL THEM THAT! ?

Twilight: You do D:

Link: I hate you all

Twilight: Love you too Link ewe which is why! (stuffs him in a horse costume)

Ilia: (foams at the mouth and jumps on him, smacking his ass) HYAH!

Link: (muffled sobs are heard through the mask as he crawls away)

Zelda: (stares at ring, takes it and bites it) (licks lips) Pfft. 14 k gold? NO. NO I WONT TA- yeah I'll take the plushie BUT NO I WONT BEAR YOUR CHILDREN

_**TheOracleofTime**_

_**OMG SOOOOOOO FUNNY MY HEAD IS GONNA EXPLOAD!Oh wait a sec thats just the voices in my head...anyways I dare Midna To go to JB's Never Say Never in 3D and stay the whole time! Oh and a question for midna as well why ru soooooooo smexy? Okay i Dare ilia to kiss midna! (yes im evil) Oh and here is some crack, a machine gun and some midna is soooooo smexy t-shirts for Twilight! (Bwahahahaha) (Cough) (Need) (Water) (Faints)**_

Twilight: Seriously….what's with all my viewers? Did my scitzophernia rub off on you? (yes… I have it ewe)

_**BlackXII**_

_**WOW! nice chapter! now THIS time Im gonna get serious with these dares! so you better be READY!**_

Midna- You're cool so High fives to you. *High Fives*

Link- Wow. I dare you to try and flirt with Zelda or Midna.

Zelda or Midna- Reject him in an orderly fashion.

Well thats all I have for now, see you next update!

Midna: Damn right I am (scoffs at your high five)

Link: NO. I WONT. Everytime a dare tells me to I get hurt!

Twilight: Do it

Link: okay (walks up to Zelda) so….Zelda…you look sexy in your..(stares) thing…

Zelda: It's a dress (rolls eyes)

Link: Go out with me?

Zelda: (begins to giggle) Oh you were serious? Naw

Link: Kay (walks back)

Twilight: That was boring Dx

THAT'S IT FOR TODAY. I'm tired as fuck and it's really hot. I hate summer e.e


	25. Chapter 25

Twilight: HELLO EVERYONE

Link: (quietly playing in the corner with dolls)

Twilight: I have come to-! (stares at Link with a blank face) The fuck are you doing?

Link: It's okay Polly Prissy Pants. (whispers) that bitch cant get us

Twilight: ….(pulls curtains over camera and beats the absolute shit out of Link)

Midna: (laughing her ass off) Man! One whole year and I missed all of this! Your humor got a bit nasty hasn't it?

Twilight: Oh stop it you~ Anyway! I have been getting comments and private emails asking me what's been going on. It's simple really I—

Zelda: She's been having bowel problems

Twilights: (pulls curtains again and beats the shit out of Zelda) No, I have NOT. But come on! Work, college, life, video games and drawing on deviantart I simply just…forgot about you guys ewe;;

Link: (wearing a neck brace) Why…oh God why has she remembered us? (stares at camera) IT'S YOU. YOU BASTARDS MADE HER REMEMBER I'LL FUCKING- (goes to attack screen and error message shows)

Midna: Sorry about that folks. Link thought he could break the camera but he ended up dislocating his shoulder.

Zelda (lowers head and shakes it)

Twilight: I also have a new heartfelt connection to that free online game called Ib. IT'S SO SAD. AIOGFHJEDOiJFOETRF

Midna: (pats her head) Garry is fine

Twilight: (swats her hand away) NO BITCH IT ISNT. GARRY DIIIIIIEEEED AND IT'S MARY'S FAULT. I'LL KILL HER

Zelda: I don't think you can harm a painting.

Twilight: Ib did….anyway. I have time for one review! And…I'm tired of having my name after a crappy book series that ALSO INSPIRED A PORNO BOOK CALLED 50 SHADES OF GREY. So tell me your name suggestions!

Link: NO. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NO.

Twilight: This is from _**TheOracleofTime**_

_**WHOA! Twilight! Guess What? U R Awesome! Now That We Got The Obvious Out Of The Way...**_

DARES!

Ilia: Search Up Furries On Google Images! U'll Like It...

Midna: Make A Movie!

Twilight: Sing Never Gonna Give You Up By Rick Astley!

PLEASE USE THIS REVIEW!

Here Take This Game Boy Advance!  
  
_**Purr...**_

Twilight: This is my favorite one. ILIA TO THE INTERNET.

Ilia: The last time I googled something it ruined my eye virginity.

Midna: (wiggles brows)

Ilia: (types up furries and stares) but….but they're not even…touching each other. It's like..nutered humping. People get turned on by this? OH GOD NO WHAT ARE THEY DOING. NO THAT GIRL DOESN'T BEND THAT WAY.

Twilight: (panting behind her)

Everyone: (Stares)

Twilight: What? It's 106 degrees where I live!

Midna: OH FUCK YES I WAS DYING FOR THIS CHANCE. (puts on French berate and picks up cone) LIGHTS! Okay Link, you are playing as—

Twilight: (attacks Midna) DO AN IB MOVIEEEE DO IIIIIIIT.

Midna: (shoves her off) Bitch this is my movie!

Twilight: DO IT OR SO HELP ME GOD I WILL CUT YOU (demented face)

Midna: o-o;;….Ib movie it is! LINK. YOU PLAY AS GARY. ILIA GO GET A 9 YEAR OLD GIRL

Ilia: (shoves a little Chinese girl in) Her name is Jinny.

Midna: ….ACTION!

Link: Wait…wait. Arent we supposed to be sent through like a twisted painting univers—

Twilight: (shoves him into the painting)

Link: FUCK YOUUUUUUuuuuuuuuu (voice fades)

Link and JInny: (land in a dark empty art gallery) Okay…from watching her play the game…we open this door? (opens door and gets chased by a headless mannequin)

Jinny: (calmly eating candy and watching) Nǐ zhège shǎguā. Jíshǐ wǒ zhīdào nà shì zǒu cuòle mén. Zuòwéi hòuguǒ, nǐ huì sǐ de guāngróng! (pulls out blade and chases Link to stab him)

Midna: (stares) This isn't even how it went.

Twilight: (sniffling) MARY YOU HEARTLESS BITCH

Link: (clinging to the painting from the inside of it) HELP ME PLEAAAAAASE

Twilight: Quick grab my hand! (reaches out to him)

Link: (tries to reach hand)

Twilight: (yanks hand away as they were about to touch) NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP, NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN, NEVER GONNA RUN AROUND AND HURT YOU.

Midna: Rickrolled bitch!

Zelda: (playing on the Gameboy) the fuck is a Crash Bandicoot?

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX**

Thanks to all who were concered about me and the story. It's still alive! You just gotta remind me! MY HEAD IS SO FULL OF FUCK I CANT REMEMBER WHAT I ATE FOR DINNER YOU PIECES OF SHITS!


	26. I MESSED UP THE CHAPTERS SORRY

Twilight: (yawning loudly) Hello fuckers!

Midna: (shakes her head) You cant great them like that

Twilight: Why not? It's perfect!

Zelda: Because they'll get angry and unfollow you

Twilight: Well fuck! HELLO MY LOVELY ANGELS

Link: Can we hurry this up? Oprah will be on soon

Everyone: (stares)

Twilight: On a side note, I did look up Link and Midna on rule 34. So. Fucking. Sexy.

Midna: What? What's rule 34?

Link: (googles them on it and hides in shame)

Midna: WHO THE HELL DRAWS PORN OF US. (points at Twilight) AND WHY WOULD YOU WATCH IT!?

Twilight: (shrugs) I was bored. And at least I didn't fap to it! I did search Ilia though, it was her mostly getting raped by her dad or being hairy.

Ilia: I'm not that hairy….

Zelda: What about me?

Twilight: You? I don't even want to talk about it.

Ilia: Can we just to the reviews already?

_**OcarinaOracle **_

_**Hi evreyone! The internet is so much fun! **_

Twilight: YOU BET YOUR ASS IT IS

Midna: (smacks)

_**Evreyone is insane like me! My first dare is...(someone wispering in my ear) what? Realy? Well, my atorny just informed me that the first few dares on my list a illegal in many states, So i'll skip those  
Link: you are awsome! but you still have to make a tuna do the macarana.  
Zelda: you have to help the crazy chicken lady from oot get her chickens back.  
Ilia: give zant and/or ganon a sponge bath.  
Midna: make a bunch of "chocolate chip" cookies, and be nice to your fans!  
Zant: DON'T BE SO CREEPY! YOU SCARE ME!  
Twillite: your so much fun! Have some penut butter fuge!  
**__**Your all awsome! See yah! :-}**_

Twilight: YOU SPELLED MY NAME WRONG YOU BASTARD AND OR BITCH

Link: I'm not doing that dare, my dignity is already ashes as it is

Midna: (climbs ontop of Link and crams tuna down his throat) .

Zelda: What do you mean I have to help the chicken lady? You didn't hear the news?

Ilia: What news?

Zelda: She's in the mental institute for trying to bomb a KFC for chicken rights

Link: (hacking up tuna) But…I always eat there…

Chicken Lady: (bursts through the door) YOU SON OF A BITCH (flying tackles him to the ground)

Twilight: How did she get in here?

Midna: Let's just walk away…slowly… AND FUCK YOU, YOU DON'T DESERVE COOKIES

Zelda: That's not being nice to your fans, Midna

Midna: (glares and foams at mouth)

Zant: Yay! (boobs bounce and jumps in tub) I haven't bathed in AGES

Ilia: :U….(stares at sponge and slowly rubs back)

Zant: No no no (leans back against tub and lifts leg into the air) You wash my legs up first

Ilia: (whispers to Midna) Did you give him a vagina too?

Midna: (nods slowly)

Ilia: Damnit…. (scrubs)

Zant: (leaning head back) This will be AWESOME

Link: He's not going to stop being creepy. Never. Ever.

Twilight: 8D

Link: Neither will she….

Twilight: well it's late here and I'm going to bed. GOODNIGHT BITCHES

Midna: Again, you cant call them that.

Twilight: Oh yeah! GOOD NIGHT MY LITTLE FUCKFACES

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXX**

_Hello everyone! I'm here to make a small announcement. Nothing bad of course! I would like your support on my other story "Forbidden Love" It would mean a lot if you could review and favorite it for me. DO IT OR I WILL NEVER UPDATE AGAIN. Kidding, kidding. But do support it c: _


	27. AUTHOR'S NOTE

Hey Everyone! I thought you all might want to know why this story hasn't been updated.

Midna: (throws tomato at) you're cancelling it aren't you!?

MIDNA CALM YOUR SHIT DOWN. IT'S NOT BEING CANCELLED.

I am actually in the process of writing my own book! I might publish it c: It's based off my story "Forbidden Love" Of course without all the Zelda stuff in it. Forbidden Love will be updated more frequently while I put this one a little to the side. So please read my other story and support me for my novel! Thank you!


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